Empire of Our Own
by TheSnarkMaster
Summary: AU. 'The 100' experiment never needed to happen because 20 years before it was due to go into effect, the Ark and all of its people were able to land safely on Earth. Fast forward and Arkadia is under the totalitarian rule of Charles Pike. What can Clarke and her group of survivors do to restore balance and democracy back on Earth among all of the colonies? (Better summary inside.)
1. Fallen

**Author's Note: Hello viewers! Here's a 'The 100' story for you all. I wish FanFiction would give more room to put up a formal summary, but I'll just give you more insight on it now.**

 **The story will not be linear - I am starting in the middle of the group's journey and there will be flashbacks with a different backstory for each of the main characters - Clarke, Bellamy and Octavia, Jasper, Monty and his father. Yes, that's the zinger of this piece! I am writing Monty's father into the mix and it should be interesting. Their characters and how they all meet is very AU. With this story, I want to have a good mix of romance, adventure, and even politics (Just like the show!). The story will mostly feature and be seen through the eyes of Clarke and Bellamy. The experience will be a bit confusing at first, but stick with it and you won't be disappointed!**

 **I actually wrote this story involving other made up characters and was going to delete it. Then, I realized that it has potential! :) The first couple chapters got fixed up, and here we are!**

 **I love reviews/follows/favorites of all sorts! Please send me your comments on this story and chapter! What would you like to see in the future? What would you like to see happen in season 4? Anything nice or constructive you have to say, I want to hear it! :)**

 **Enjoy reading you guys!**

 _Chapter 1: Fallen_

 _Clarke POV:_

I never thought I'd live to see the day where my parents were beaten nearly to death in front of my very eyes. Sure, they did some bad things in the recent past, but it didn't require the punishment that they were receiving this moment. Through the bushes that hid my face, I watched as Jake and Abby Griffin were at the mercy of the Progressives. They were once such strong people – Abby was second in command to Chancellor Jaha's counsel whereas Jake was Arcadia's leading engineer. Now, they looked so defeated, yet determination shone through their blood-caked faces. Everything they did was to protect me.

"Clarke," my traveling companion said. "We have what we need, we need to go _now_."

My whole mind was such a jumbled mess; I could hear what he was saying, but my body wouldn't obey or respond. It was as if I was watching a movie being so entranced by the picture show that I couldn't move from my seat.

I could see the Progressives begin to drag their limp bodies off to where their bedroom was situated. I may not be living there anymore, but I damn well knew where every room in that house was. As tears began to rim my eyes, I heard the same voice slightly behind me, but much louder this time. "Please Clarke," he said while setting his hand on my shoulder.

Acting on impulse, I swiftly turned around and tackled him to the ground. I was either too strong for him or he just wasn't looking or a fight for a change because he went down easier than expected. Straddling his body, I saw the look of worry and hurt across his beautiful face. _Beautiful face? C'mon Clarke, get a damn grip!_ He was only trying to help, even though it resulted in our current compromising position. Any other day, I would have immediately gone red in the face being on top of him. "I-I'm so sorry. I didn't mean…" I began to say as a few stray tears started to fall onto my cheek.

Bellamy had seen so much worse than I and could hold it together, so why couldn't I?

As I got off of him, he engulfed me into a warm and comforting hug. The tender moment was nothing quite like I would expect from someone like him. Nevertheless, it was incredibly comfortable to be within his strong and lean arms. "Hey," he said. "It's okay, don't cry. They're gonna be okay. Just… have a little faith, would ya? I need you here with me, Clarke."

As I looked into his eyes, I couldn't decipher if he meant this in a romantic way or in a survival-mode way. My stubborn mind finally chose to go into survival mode though, and I tried to clean up my demeanor.

As he wiped the tears from my eyes, I said, "Yeah. You're right. We need to go. Uhhhh, sorry I tackled you, by the way. Old habits die hard, huh?" I thought about the way we used to play fight when Octavia and I came back home from a self-defense session with Marcus Kane, our mentor.

"I get it," he said. "Don't worry. I wouldn't want anybody to know that I got beat up by a girl."

"And by that you mean, beat up by a girl again, right?" I replied.

"Could we not bring that up right now?" he said with the playfulness returning to his too-stoic voice. "C'mon, ladies first."

As he pated a branch and held out his hand, I happily denied it. Instead, I said, "Right. So, after you then?"

Making our way back to camp at a leisurely pace, I thought to myself in our pleasant silence of the afternoon breeze. _Maybe things will be better. Given time. And alcohol. Yep, lots of that._

Thankfully, it wasn't a terribly long walk back to our little makeshift camp. Given the awkward silence between Bellamy and I, I was looking forward to splitting apart for the rest of the day.

Finally, we arrived.

"Ah, good," Ben said. "Y'all are finally back. And with full bags? My, my… it must've been a good run, I reckon?"

"Yep!" answered Bellamy. "Things didn't go as bad as we thought. Couple of cuts and bruises that can easily be fixed. Everything all good here?" I found it so baffling that Bellamy could be tender as ever with me, but such a leader around our peers.

"Doesn't it always?" Octavia snarked. "Just think of all the fun things we could've done without you two buzzkills around!"

"Awww, c'mon O. Aren't I your favorite person?" Bellamy asked while attempting to give her a hug. After all, they were brother and sister. They loved each other dearly, but there was so much sass between the two of them.

"Pfft," Octavia said as she stepped out of his waiting embrace. "Clarke is obviously my favorite person here."

As they got into their daily heated discussion, I set two backpacks down next to the one Bellamy was carrying. "So, what'd we get today?" Asked Ben.

"More food and water. Some ammo for our guns and a couple hunting and skinning knives. Hmm," I rethought. "Oh, some meds and first aid kits. Jasper can make good use for those. We even scored a new sleeping bag and pillow from a willing family."

"Jeez, really?" asked Ben, seeming surprised.

"Yeah," I said with distance to my voice. "People were kind today… It's relieving to have good people left in this world still."

Ben noticed my strange demeanor, but before he could respond, Monty came out from who-knows-where and asked, "Did you get it? Huh? Did ya?"

 _How is this guy almost nineteen? He acts like he's five!_ "What're you talking about?" I asked with fake confusion.

"C'mon Clarke," he began. "You promised me!"

"Alright, alright. Calm down," I reassured. "You bet your ass I got it!"

I bent down and fished out the can of cheese for Monty. _Seriously, who gets that excited about processed cheese?_ Unluckily for me, it was buried deep beneath the intoxicating labels that showed different bottles of alcohol.

Before I handed him the can, I said with mock patronization, "Now, if I give you this, will you keep quiet and share if others want some?"

"Yes, ma'am!"

I handed him the can of cheese with a fake smile plastered across my face. Before I knew it, I was engulfed in another hug that I gladly returned. As soon as it began, it was over and I felt a sense of loneliness once again. _This kid… he just gives the BEST hugs!_

"We havin' a party tonight or something?" Ben asked gesturing towards the bottles of alcohol.

"Well, I thought we could all use something good, ya know? Hope you don't mind," I said.

"Not at all," he said. "I think I'll probably have a drink myself, in that case."

"Good to hear! You deserve it Ben," I said with as much enthusiasm as I could muster up.

As he turned around to do whatever it is Ben does in his free time, I began to gather some stuff to take a much needed back in the river we were situated near.

We've been in the same campground for several weeks now and neither the Progressives nor Chancellor Pike's officers have been able to pin down our location. Therefore, why not make ourselves as comfortable as possible? Surprisingly, we weren't all that far away from Arcadia – maybe a few ten or twenty miles from the small, yet powerful city center. We were also outside of Mountain Men territory and Cage Wallace's men, which they would've gladly sold us out to Arcadia given the chance. Luckily for us, we were situated near some peaceful Grounder territories. They let us use their river and kept our location a secret whenever visited by Pike's officers, and we disposed of any loose Progressives that put them in danger.

Walking over to grab the bar of soap and a worn-out towel, I stumbled upon Jasper walking the other direction. _Oh, please don't talk to me, I'm in no mood for this…_

"Hey! What took y'all so long?" Jasper asked with a cheery voice.

 _So much for just slipping away for a couple minutes. God forbid I get some alone time._

"Pfft, none of your business." _C'mon, just leave me alone._

"Did you and Bellamy like shag in the woods or something?" he asked while wiggling his eyebrows.

"No," I stated curtly. "Just took a trip down _memory lane_."

As realization struck his face, he gave me a somber look. "Clarke, I-I didn't mean it. If I had known, I wouldn't have-"

Walking up to him to pat his shoulder, I said, "Don't worry about it. Shit happens, am I right?"

Before he could say anything else, I said to everyone in our camp, "Hey all, I'm going down to the river for a few. Alone."

Not giving anyone any time to object, I made my way down our little makeshift pathway to grab a much needed bath. _Hopefully, they understand that I don't want to be messed with right now._

As I neared the river, I began taking lighter and lighter steps to make sure that no one was around to see me strip. I definitely learned that the hard way with Jasper one day. Octavia was so pissed when I decked him in the face that I just couldn't stop laughing. Bellamy looked livid that he couldn't do so himself. At least Jasper's bruise is almost gone!

Finally arriving at the river, I did one last look-around before beginning to strip. Deciding that everything was clear, I slipped off my combat boots, followed by my blue fleece jacket. Then, I began to discard the light-grey half-sleeve shirt. This was probably my favorite shirt, but the middle of it ripped slightly, exposing my ample breasts even more so. Needless to say, Octavia was all for me being a little risqué, but Bellamy would have a tantrum every day he saw it on me. I was so convinced that this was my lucky shirt; it just so happened that I was wearing it today when we got our bountiful amount of supplies. Coincidence? I think not.

Next to come off were my skinny jeans that fit me in all the right places, even being terribly hard to get off. Taking one last extra precautionary glance around, I quickly threw off the remaining underwear and jumped into the water with the bar of soap.

The water felt extraordinary today. It was cold, but not painfully cold like the weeks before. I took this peace and quiet for granted. I swam to the grassy shore of the water and laid my head against my arm to just think about everything:

 _So what am I supposed to do now? My parents have been bruised and broken at the expense of me. Bellamy had to hold me back from killing all of Pike's sons of bitch robots right then and there. The whole reason for my parents sending me away was to keep everyone safe, but what good is it doing now? I wasn't able to save them today, so what good can I really do in the future? And Bellamy… what am I even supposed to do about him? I know he knows I'm torn because of this, but it's not like he can keep an eye on me forever. I'm not his responsibility. How was I supposed to convince my own corrupt government amongst other foreign governments to band together and take Charles Pike out of position? How was I supposed to do all of that when I couldn't even keep sane with five of my friends? How can these people expect me to be their God damn "beacon of hope"?_

As I let a few stress-tears escape my barriers, I was pulled from my thoughts by a rustling in the woods. Grabbing my knife from the discarded jeans and wiping traces of tears from my eyes, I mentally and physically prepared myself for what might be out there. Part of me wished to not have to fight anyone off. Maybe it would just be a woodland creature or a peaceful grounder that needed water.

However, I wouldn't mind if I could kill one of those asshole robots. I had a lot of frustration to get rid of right now.

At long last, the figure finally emerged from the woods and I was relieved to see that it was only Octavia. "Jesus O!" I quietly yelled. "You scared the shit outta me."

"Sorry Clarke," she said. "Mind if I join? I'm kinda filthier than the ground we've been walking on."

"Hmmm," I pretended to think. "Sure, I suppose me and my fat ass can make some room for you."

"Thanks," she said and gave me a cheeky smile as she quickly stripped down and jumped into the water. Her wet brown hair stuck to her face as I handed her the bar of soap. "So, you wanna talk about it?"

 _Oh, here we go!_

"No, not really," I said. "But I guess I can try."

After a few minutes, I finally got my thoughts relatively organized in our awkward silence. "Octavia, I just witnessed my parents getting the shit beat out of them and I couldn't do a damn thing about it! All the while, your idiot brother had the audacity to hold me back – damn him! Oh, and not to mention, how can I convince people to go against Pike? Everyone is too scared of him to do a damn thing about his corrupt 'leadership'. How can I keep you guys and everyone else alive when I can't even keep my fucking emotions in check? You shouldn't have come with… it's too dangerous. Octavia, I feel so stupid and dramatic for asking this, but why me? Why is all of this so frustrating?"

A soft smile appeared on Octavia's face as she said, "Clarke, everything will work out the way it's supposed to. Your parents are going to be fine. And we'll find them, I promise. Even if it is just you and me, we'll get them, okay? And I know you're having mixed feelings about being a leader, but you don't have to do it alone. I'm not stupid, I know that Bellamy at least is trying to take some of that pressure off of you. You know what Clarke? If you choose to fight, I'll be there with you, but if you choose to bail, then I'll go with you. _We're_ in this together."

I did not miss the emphasis on "we're."

Letting a half smile play on my lips, I said, "You know, that's exactly what I need right now. Thank you, O. It means a lot that I have at least one person who'll stand by me 'til the end."

"That's what I'm here for, right?" she said. "I am also here to talk to you about Bellamy – I know he likes you. I can see it in his eyes and hear it in his voice. My brother, even being the idiot he is sometimes, is falling for you hard." Even though Octavia was his sister, she had been trying to set us up for years now. Apparently, we were "too" alike for our own goods.

"I'm really doubtin' that he has feelings for me, O," I said with and eye roll.

"Hey! I just wanted to give you my blessing, whether you wanted it or not. You know, Bellamy was the one who insisted I come and check on you. Mostly because he figured you would've decked him in the face judgin' by the way you were talking about him. Also, I'm sure you would've hit him where it counts if he saw you naked," she laughed.

Albeit the cold water, my face turned red from a sudden heat that came out of nowhere. "Why don't we just drop it?" I asked.

"You're askin' me to drop a subject like this? Tsk, tsk Clarke. You must be losin' your senses," she said while letting out a small chuckle.

"Mhmm, right," I began. "So let's talk about you and Jasper. Now that boy's fallin' head over heels for you."

"You know what?" Octavia said. "I suppose we can just drop it for now."

 **So, how was it? Don't forget to leave comments! :)**


	2. Here's to Us

**Author's Note: Hello all! Few things to get straight with this fic and chapter before we jump in! First off, I have made a rough plan for the first few chapters of the story - YAY!**

 **Second, I have decided that I I'm going to have this story in 3 parts compromised of a few chapters each. What I haven't decided, is if I want to split the parts up into three different Fan Fics. Thoughts on that?**

 **Third, I forgot to mention the significance of the titles. the main title,** ** _Empire of Our Own_** **, comes from RAIGN, whose song was featured in Season 2. Chapter 1 featured a song by Volbeat that captures the tone of the piece. This chapter is a song by Hailstorm. I cannot put into words how these songs fit for each chapter, but they do in my mind. Give each of them a listen if you haven't already. :)**

 **Finally, the next couple of chapters will have flashbacks telling why they all ran from Arkadia. (I figured it was better to do that, than to have them all sit by the campfire and tell stories.) Each flashback will be marked with "** ** _(Flashback)_** **" before it happens and when the story comes back to present tense, it will be marked as "** ** _(Present)_** **." This same format applies to the point of view between characters.**

 **This chapter will be Ben's flashback, but next chapter will feature Monty's! Hope you all enjoy what I have to offer and let me know what you all think through review/favorite/follow. :)**

 _Chapter 2: Here's to Us_

 _Ben POV (Flashback):_

As Monty and I ran through the dense forest that surrounded our property in Arkadia, I couldn't help but think about our time on the Ark itself. I remember the books we used to read about how people of Earth tried so hard to get to space and how it wasn't made possible until the nineteen-hundreds. Ninety-seven years after Earth became unlivable, we were finally on our way to going back down! The air was breathable and our greatest scientists were able to tell us that there is means for survival down there.

Most people questioned living on Earth. Why change a good thing? Why would people want to leave the comforts of space and try to make it in a new environment?

Only a select few people knew – mostly the higher ups – that the Ark was actually running out of its air supply. Who knows, maybe we would have stayed in space if we had unlimited air.

I remember the first time I ever ran on Earth. Hannah, Monty and I had all just gotten off the Exodus ship and Monty took off running to God-knows-where. He was laughing and screaming with glee as I followed behind him. Every once in a while, I would look back and see Hannah watching us; a beautiful smile graced her face as the sun shone on us. All of us.

As I ran now, I could feel myself being weighed down by several guns and a few knives as Monty carried a small bag of food and water. "Keep going Monty, don't look back!" I yelled over the wind that whipped passed our ears.

He didn't respond, but I noticed him increasing his speed.

We raced through the tall trees as I recalled the day things started going bad in Arkadia. Chancellor Jaha and his son had passed away and Charles Pike assumed a leadership position. This was a big step for our community as we had never had a democratically-elected- majority- rule political system. I was in favor of this as opposed to a monarchy, but Thelonious' sudden death was not favorable among our people. The people of Arkadia were looking for someone to blame. They leered at the Grounders. Pike had an answer to get back at the Grounders, and therefore he was in favor of everyone.

His rule brought many jobs to the people of Arkadia. Hell, he even gave Hannah a position as a personal officer. Every other week, he would come to our single-family home and eat dinner with us. Monty loved him and his teaching lessons from previous years.

Hannah and I could see behind Charles' façade though. To the common folk, he was a cruel man and didn't offer welfare of any sort to those who couldn't find work or means of trade. He dismantled the counsel, choosing to make executive decisions on his own. Charles Pike was the epitome of judge, jury and executioner.

However, when he offered Monty a position in the Guard, Hannah and I couldn't refuse. At least, not at first. I mean, we wanted our son to be financially secure, so he wouldn't be impoverished like some of the lower-class citizens.

One day, I asked Charles what Monty's job would entail. He responded with, "We will train him as if we were training a guard on the Ark and then we'll send him out with a few other officers and a few Progressives to attempt peace with Grounder villages. His job description seemed harmless enough.

When I went home and relayed his claim to Hannah, she looked at me with horrified eyes. "What? No, no, no! We can't let our baby do this!"

"Why?" I asked. _What was the problem with making peace?_ "What's the problem, Hannah?"

"You don't understand," she said while flopping down onto the dining room chair. "Pike. He… oh god, he… trains new officers and sends them out with Progressives to exterminate Grounder villages, not make peace!"

I almost began crying at the prospect of our little boy – albeit being a teenager – being sent out to kill innocent lives. 'Skaikru' and Grounders were never known to get along, but it never would've dawned on me that Pike's officers would just kill without conviction otherwise. "Villages? You mean to say villages? Men?" I asked as I paced the kitchen. Hannah nodded. "Women?" I questioned once more. Hannah nodded. "Children?" she nodded once more with tears brimming her eyes.

I plopped down in the chair next to her. My whole boy felt numb and I couldn't find it in me to look my wife in the eyes. _She knew, she knew all of this and she didn't tell anyone._ "Did you know that our son was going to be doing this?" I asked with a seething tone.

"No!" she blurted and rose from her seat at an alarming speed. "Of course not! I would never want that life for him! I just thought Charles would give him a security job on the watch towers."

"We can't let Monty do this," I stated firmly. Although I lost almost all respect for my wife in that moment, we still had to protect our son by any means necessary. He shouldn't have to live with killing innocent people for the rest of his life.

"Agreed," she had said. The very next day she had gone to tell Chancellor Pike to revoke his offer in which he did not respond kindly.

When Hannah came home, Monty was in his room, reading for a biology exam. "Ben! Ben, where are you?" she asked hysterically. As I came around the corner, I could see her grabbing a small backpack and filling it with a few canned goods and two canteens of water. "He moved up the draft date."

I just stood there, stock-still. "What?" _No, this couldn't be happening._

"Pike moved up the draft date to tomorrow, they're coming to take him away right now Ben! You HAVE to get out of here before they come for him," she plead with me.

"What do you mean me? Why can't you go?" I asked, hurriedly.

"Because they'll find me if I go with you, I can't… I just can't she said. "Monty! Come out here please!"

Everything happened so fast. Hannah hugged her only son goodbye and then slipped the small backpack onto him. "I love you so much, my son."

"Mom, I love you too… but what's going on?" Monty kept asking. The worry and confusion was plain as day on his face.

Hannah went to the living room and quickly lifted a floor board, unveiling a plethora of weapons ranging from hunting and skinning knives, machetes, a hand gun with a holster, and a sniper rifle. "Woah Mom! Where the hell did these come from?!" Monty exclaimed.

"Language," she and I exclaimed in unison. At that, she looked at me and I looked back at her. We smiled softly at each other, remembering all of the previous times we scolded our son for his bad language. Suddenly, there was a harsh knock at the front door and our smiles disappeared.

With one last chaste kiss and a look that said more than 'I love you,' Monty and I were running out of our backdoor and into the woods.

What came next was nothing short of horrifying. Even from our position in the woods and with the wind sailing passed our ears, a single shot of a gun could be heard.

He didn't trip, and he didn't fall. Monty simply just fell to the ground on his knees. I stopped next to him, not falling but not fully standing. The shot could mean anything, it really could. But, I knew. _My Hannah is no more._ "Monty… c'mon get up. We have to go," I said while pulling him up. I couldn't even let my poor kid grieve for his mom. We have to keep going Monty."

"Yeah, yeah we do," he said while brushing off his dirty knees and his wet eyes.

 _Clarke POV (Present):_

After about a week of putting off our little drinking party, we all decided that tonight was going to be the night! Everyone seemed to be in good enough moods, aside from Ben who seemed distraught.

Being the only parent amongst us and being the oldest, I could tell Ben tried to be strong for us twenty-four-seven. However, I recognized the look in his eyes; it's the same look I felt when leaving my parents behind. I also knew that he wanted to be left alone, so I assigned everyone jobs that didn't require the height or strength of Ben. I even steered Monty in the direction of helping Bellamy set traps around the camp – if anyone came near us, we would know.

Even though Ben seemed solemn, I knew he would appreciate a few drinks tonight. He probably needed good spirits more than anyone right now.

"So," Octavia bounced up next to me out of nowhere. _Damn, this girl needed a bell around her neck._ "What are we doing for dinner? It's not safe to drink on an empty stomach, you know!"

"And I bet you wouldn't know that if you didn't spend so much time around Jasper," I mumbled.

"What?" she asked.

"What?" I playfully countered. "Unless you guys want food poisoning again, I don't recommend my cooking. Fend for yourself I guess?" I offered.

"So long as you're not cooking," Octavia shivered.

"I was thinking about taking Monty out hunting tomorrow morning to see if we can't catch anything. Hopefully, I won' regret it, but I'm thinking about letting him shoot the bow. Maybe perfect his 'kill shot,'" I said, changing up the subject from my apparent shitty cooking. The bow was a long time gift from Bellamy to me after I outgrew the one my dad got me. It was my prized possession and I didn't much care for other people touching it, not even the maker.

Of course, I had let Octavia use the bow a few times, but her preferred weapon was a machete or twin blades whenever she could get her hands on them.

"That could be good for him! She exclaimed. "Good to get him used to using other weapons if he doesn't have that hand gun of his. What time do you plan on leaving? Dawn?"

"Yeah, most likely. That usually tends to be the plan. But-" I began, but was interrupted.

"But what?" she asked.

 _Damn girl doesn't have a patient bone in her body! Must get that from her brother…_

"You're really impatient, did ya know that?" I asked, my voice covered in mock frustration.

"Please," Octavia began. "Compared to you?"

 _She has a fair point._

"I was going to say, that depending on how late everyone is up, we might want to leave later. What are your thoughts?"

"Who's taking watch tonight?" Octavia asked.

"I am and whoever falls asleep first is," I said, leaving it to chance.

"Just go when you and Monty are both awake. Shouldn't be a problem, right? You don't want to be tired when you go out," she pointed out.

"We'll see, then."

For the rest of the day, Bellamy and Monty worked on making traps and noise-makers for anything that might stumble into our campground.

Jasper was in charge of organizing and minimalizing our first-aid kits and other supplies. Instead of carrying around six backpacks with six sleeping bags, it would be lessened to three backpacks and everyone would switch off and help with carrying them.

Octavia and I were gathering everything for tonight and trying to prepare a feast fit for kings! Really, this meant that we each got our own can of assorted fruit and a full bowl of rabbit stew. Unfortunately, it was the last of our game, so I was hoping there would be some luck with tomorrow's findings. Octavia and I got some much needed 'girl time' and talked about the latest philosophical arguments Monty and Jasper were having. We talked about the calmness of the day. We even talked about Bellamy for a while.

It seemed as if in no time, everyone was back in the camp. Looking over my family of five, I realized just how amazing each and every one of them were. Where would I be if I hadn't met any of these people?

As I smiled slightly to myself, I found the dark orbs I had been subconsciously seeking out. His eyes were so transfixing, that I almost didn't notice his bare chest. _Why the hell wasn't he wearing a shirt and why the hell was I so attracted to his tan body?_

That horny thought aside, I gestured my head away from the camp. We made our way out of earshot as to obviously not be heard.

"Are all of the traps set?" I asked, still a little red in the face. _Why couldn't he just put a damn shirt on?_

"Traps are set and tested. Don't worry your pretty little head off, Princess," he rolled his eyes.

"There's gonna come a time when an actual princess comes along and will be seriously offended by that Mr. Blake," I snarked.

"Well then she'll just have to deal with it. You're the only princess of my concern," he said back.

This was nice. It was the first time we had really talked or joked – aside from bickering – since the events of last week.

"So I just wanted to apologize for last week again," I said, while not directly looking him in the eye. Apologizing wasn't a strong suit of mine.

"Clarke, it's fine. I completely understand," he said with a far-off look. _Yes, he did indeed understand._

Bellamy was a very private person, but Octavia was not. I fully knew the reason as to why they had to run away, and it wasn't anything that anyone would want to say out loud. I heard it from Octavia, but I knew that Bellamy would tell me when he was ready. Or, he would at least try.

"Can we just forget about it? I'd rather not dwell on the past right now. It's time to have some fun," I said with a chuckle. Hopefully, I could pull him out of his brooding before it was too late.

"Anything for you, baby cakes," he said with a wink.

"Baby cakes? That's new. Pig," I muttered. "I suddenly like 'Princess' a whole lot better."

"Only for you," he said while giving me one of his trademark grins.

 _God, I loved that grin so much. Wait… ugh, damn hormones._

Blushing slightly at his knowing gaze, I tried to scowl at him, which failed and turned into a fit of giggles. _Giggling?! Since when goes Clarke Griffin giggle?_

He smiled a broad toothy smile at me. "It's been awhile since I've heard you laugh. A real laugh, at least. It's nice."

"Whatever floats your boat, kiss ass. C'mon, let's go get something to eat or drink." I said with a smile. "By the way, put a shirt on before you catch a cold, Bellamy!"

"Why would I do that when I know you like looking at my chest?" he asked.

I blushed fiercely as he walked back to our camp.

After hours of eating and drinking half of each bottle of alcohol, we were all at a stage of telling stupid jokes and laughing at every little thing.

That is everyone except for me. I decided to stay somewhat sober tonight, only taking small sips of the strong content every now and then. Even Monty was drinking more than me! _Oh boy, he is in for a surprise when I wake his lazy ass up at the crack of dawn!_

Ben was starting to get pretty out of it and Octavia was already smashed and trying to climb on Jasper's lap. About the only thing that stopped her from completely getting on top of him was Bellamy's death glare directed their way. I couldn't wait to remind her about this tomorrow. Bellamy was by far the calmest of the heavy-drinkers tonight, but this red tint to his cheeks and glazed eyes told me that he was very drunk right now.

Suddenly, Ben got up and almost stumbled over. After he righted himself, he said, "I propose a toast!" Everyone waited for him to continue. "You beautiful are my family now and no matter what happens when all of this is over, I will love you all," Ben slurred while putting his hand on Monty's shoulder. To everyone else who was inebriated, they might've seen it as a sign of affection, but I saw that it was only Ben trying to stay upright.

 _What the hell?_ I raised my glass.

"To us," I simply, but firmly stated.

"To survival," Ben reprised.

"To friends," said Monty, looking around at the members around the campfire with adoration in his relaxed face and fisting-pumping Jasper.

"To family," slurred Octavia, holding up her glass to mine.

"To good times," Jasper smiled.

"To love," Bellamy said while looking me dead in the eyes and raising his glass to meet everyone else's. _Was I just imagining that look he was giving me or was it for real?_

In that ten second time span between dark brown eyes meeting my blue ones, it felt as if hours passed as I began to realize just how strongly I felt for Bellamy. He made me feel like I could do anything, like I could find my inner peace every time I gazed at his soothing smile or smoldering eyes; but it wasn't like I was planning on telling him that anytime soon. After all, it could just be the alcohol talking.

Soon after making the toast, people started to make their way to bed in their own tents. I basically had to force Octavia into hers and my tent, so she wouldn't run into Jasper's tent while Bellamy was still in there.

We had a good sleeping arrangement – Octavia and I shared one tent, Bellamy and Jasper were reluctantly in another, and Monty and Ben were in the last. I didn't want to mess up the order that was set. It was the only roommate situation Bellamy wouldn't get mad about and everyone would feel comfortable with.

After making sure everyone was asleep, or at least in bed and not throwing up, I sat down by the fire with a copy of a romance novel I picked up from the Ark's library so long ago. It was the only form of entertainment I brought before I had to flee. As I read, I admired the chemistry between the protagonist and her Scottish lover. Reading the author's words of adoration between the two was something that was out of this world – their love was inspiring. Not to mention, the scenery described in the book sounded beautiful. The author did a fine job with every aspect of the novel and I only hoped to stumble upon the sequel, even though the chances were very low. The only indication I had to a sequel was the small section in the back dedicated to the first two chapters of the second book. I was too scared to read them for fear of not receiving closure on the star-crossed lovers.

I had just finished rereading the end of chapter two when I heard a loud whimper and a few sobs coming from my tent.

 _Octavia._

I rushed to our tent to see her sitting up in the sleeping bag, a mixture of what looked like either sweat or tears streaming down her face. I purposefully collapsed down next to her and grabbed her face to look at me with both hands. "Hey, hey. Shhh. It's okay. You're fine, see?" I said in a soothing, but gravely tone. I hated that she felt so sad in this moment.

Suddenly, she sat further up in her makeshift bed and engulfed me in a bone-crushing hug. Any other time, I would've yelled and screamed until she let me go, but not this time. My best friend needed me right now. I tried to wrap my arms around her and rub small circles in her back as she cried even harder into my shoulder.

Another few minutes of wracking sobs and I was positive that Octavia had woken up at least two people besides myself.

Finally, her vicious sobs became soft shudders as she began to calm down. I figured that now would be as good as any time to ask what had happened.

"O," I said in a calming voice. "Talk to me. What happened?"

"Y-you and Bell…" she paused to sniffle and get herself together. "and everyone else were gone and I was alone. There was no one, Clarke – Pike killed everyone. I saw everyone's… bodies," she said in a quiet, forced whisper.

"O, look at me," I said in a stern, but quiet voice. "I'm still here. Bell is still here. Jasper is still here, and Monty and Ben are sure as hell still here. Remember what we said about always sticking together? That's not going to change. Me, Jasper and everyone else are all fine."

"Is that what you think?" she challenged.

"It's what I know."

She looked down after a few seconds and said, "You're right. I'm sorry. I just…"

"I know, I get nightmares all the time," I admitted. "C'mon, lay back down and get comfy." When she looked all tucked in and as comfortable as possible, she looked at me with a questioning gaze.

I began to sing:

 _"_ _Come stop your crying, it'll be alright_

 _Just take my hand, hold it tight_

 _I will protect you from all around you_

 _I will be here, don't you cry_

 _For one so small, you seem so strong_

 _My arms will hold you, keep you safe and warm_

 _This bond between us can't be broken, I will be here_

 _Don't you cry_

 _Cause you'll be in my heart_

 _Yes, you'll be in my heart_

 _From this day on, now and forever more_

 _You'll be in my heart_

 _No matter what they say_

 _You'll be here, in my heart_

 _Always."_

It worked! She was actually falling asleep and calming down. _Congrats Clarke._

I sat up and walked out of the tent as silently as I possibly could without setting off the hibernating bear in my tent. I intended to go sit back down beside the fire for a couple more peaceful moments and read some more. Octavia was the first one awake, but I was definitely not planning on keeping her up for watch duty.

Immediately walking out of the entrance to the smallish tent, I was met with two pairs of eyes. _Oh great._

"What are y'all doin' up?" I whispered and could hear the tiredness in my voice.

"Well, we heard some weird noises, so naturally we decided to be the little detectives we are and sleuth around a bit, ya know?" said Jasper whose voice was either laced with sarcasm, annoyance or worry for Octavia. Either way, I wasn't in the mood for dealing with his sassy attitude.

"Go ahead," I simply stated while gesturing to the tent. "I ain't gonna stop ya. She needs all the moral support she can get. Bellamy looked like he had a thing or two to say about the roommate situation, but one look from me silenced him nonetheless.

Jasper looked taken aback towards my lenient attitude and said a very quick thank you before going to attempt to wake up the sleeping grizzly. Standing there in my own shock of leniency, I had almost completely forgotten the second presence there.

"Bell, you should probably go back to bed. Octavia will be fine," I said with resignation.

I waited a moment to see if he'd say anything.

He didn't. Bellamy just stared into my eyes looking for something I couldn't quite put my finger on. Maybe I was looking for the same thing? Who's to say I was if I didn't even know what I was looking for?

I swiftly broke eye contact, like it was any other less-awkward occasion. As I walked by him to retrieve my book, he grabbed my forearm; his grip was tight enough to stop me mid-step, but also loose enough to not hurt me. All the same, I looked to him with sullen eyes.

"Was that you? Who sang?" he said in a low whisper that sent shivers down my back. He wasn't slurring his words, but I could still smell the sweet alcohol coming from his breathe.

My breath hitched in my throat. "Yeah."

"You have a beautiful voice. You should sing more often," he whispered.

"Th-thank you," I said back, shocked.

As if just now realizing that his hand was still wrapped around my arm, he let go quick as lightning and I couldn't help feeling the chill that came across the part of my arm that replaced his warm, calloused hand. "You're going hunting tomorrow?" he asked after what felt like hours of just standing there.

"Yeah, why do you ask?" I asked.

"Sleep," he stated simply.

"Nah," I began. "Really, I'm not even that tired right now."

Before I knew it, Bellamy was directly in front of me with both of his hands on my shoulders. "Clarke, you need to sleep. I'll take over watch for the next couple hours and you go catch up on sleep in mine and Jasper's tent."

"Yeah, sure. Whatever," I said all of a suddenly too exhausted to even argue with Bellamy.

"You can use my sleeping bag, it's the brown one. Just don't make it smell too girly and stuff. I still have a reputation to uphold," he said with a half smirk playing on his lips.

Bellamy did have quite the lady-killer reputation back at Arkadia, which is one of the reasons why I had never even considered him to be "boyfriend material." The past two years and being on the run seemed to have calmed him down though and made him see his priorities more clearly. I could now see why my parents approved of him so much.

"I promise to try not to," I said with my voice now completely laced with a sleepy tone. "Goodnight and thank you. It means a lot, if you need any help or whatever, then don't hesitate to wake me."

"In your dreams. Goodnight Princess," he said while kissing my temple as if he had a habit of doing that.

I rushed off to his tent and laid down in the brown sleeping bag, while rubbing at the tingling sensation on my forehead.

 _How the hell does a love story even fit into all of this shit?_

That was the last conscious thought I had before passing out beneath the musky scent of the sleeping bag. That night, I dreamt of dark brown eyes and tanned skin.

 **Please don't forget to comment on the story! Thank you all for reading! :)**


	3. You Are the Wilderness

**Author's Note: Hi guys! I'm back with another installment of this lovely fic! I see that I have some follows and favorites - THANK YOU. Now let's just get some comments going ;) This chapter's song is by Voxhaul Broadcast and is featured in The Walking Dead tv show. The pure grittiness of the song is what really set the tone for chapter 3. I really hope you guys enjoy this chapter's flashback through Monty's POV. Chapter 4 will be Jasper's story of how he met the gang!**

 **If you're excited for the following chapters and what I have planned, feel free to leave a review of the chapter and story! As always favorite and follow it as well. I absolutely love writing for other people and love their feedback. ~Hint, hint.~ Enjoy the story everyone! :)**

 _Chapter 3: You Are the Wilderness_

 _Monty POV (Flashback):_

It had been three days and three nights since we had left Arkadia.

It had been three days and three nights since my mother had been killed. On the inside, I knew this was true; I could admit this in my head and was brutally reminded of it each day and night since it did happen. On the outside, I couldn't bring myself to say it.

It had been three days and three nights, and I could not admit out loud that my mother was dead. The only indication I received that it had actually happened was my dad's constant sullen eyes.

On the first night when we were miles and miles into the woods, hoping that no Guards or Progressives would come find us, we cried for the loss of Hannah – beloved mother and wife – as well as the loss of our home.

I was only a few years old when we landed on Earth and I couldn't remember our home on the Ark beforehand. Arkadia was the first home I remember, and after a decade and a half, it was taken from me.

On the second night, I questioned my father why we had to leave Arkadia and why mom couldn't come with. He answered me with the truth that I did not want. The man I once called Professor Pike and teacher wanted me to kill innocent lives. How could I support that? How could anyone support that? _How could mom support that monster?_ I felt such disrespect for my mother. If this were a trial for a common murderer, she would be charged as an accessory; but when she was an accessory to a murder at the hand of our Chancellor, she was rewarded. Hell, our family was rewarded!

But now, I didn't want anything to do with Chancellor Pike. I only wanted my vengeance on him and then I wanted to be done. My mother's fate was his fault.

The third night came and went. Luckily, we didn't have to use any of the weapons my mother practically shoved in our hands, but our food and water count was running low. We didn't want to travel along the river so close to Arkadia for fear that the Progressives would spot us. Those damn robots couldn't just remain as maintenance droids. No, they had to be hunters too! We currently only had one can of beans left to share between the two of us. We could make it last until the next day, but then we would need to start hunting for game.

 _What were we going to do?_

"Dad," I said over the crackle of our barely-there fire. "What are we going to do?"

"I don't know son, I don't know," he said without looking at me.

That night we slept in front of the dying fire and woke up to the bitter cold morning air. It was barely light outside, but the sun was beginning to make its appearance from behind the clouds.

That was not the reason why I woke up though. I woke to the sound of my father talking under his breath to a man holding a gun to my dad's head. The man looked no older than his mid-twenties, with brown eyes and hair, and a lean build. He looked recognizable, but from where? He was definitely from Arkadia; that much I could tell. Maybe he was an officer? _Oh god, I can't lose my dad, he's all that I have left._

My dad saw that I was awake and said, "Monty, just stay down. Okay?"

The only thing I could do was nod my head and watch the calm man's hand. His finger was nowhere near the trigger, but all it takes is one second for that to change.

"Now, I'll ask you one more time," the seething man said while pressing the gun further into my father's temple. "Why are you here?"

"And I will tell you once again, that I don't have to answer to you," my dad stated calmly, but in a firm tone.

With that, my dad turned the tables and was able to smack the gun across the clearing we were in. He then tackled the unknown man to the ground and the two began to wrestle for the upper hand.

Both were eager to get to the gun, but also tried to knock the other one out so as not to follow. As they rolled around the dirt and brush, I finally got the senses to get the unknown assailant's gun. _Go, run. Now!_

I sprinted towards the gun and picked it up right as he sent a hard punch to my father's jaw, knocking him to the ground; he seemed like he had fighting experience. I would have to tread carefully with this man. "Stop!" I yelled, pointing the gun at the man. "Do not move, or I swear to God, I will shoot you."

 _I was not going to lose both of my parents._

The man immediately backed up from my father and put his hands up. "Don't do anything you won't regret, man" the man said. Once again, he looked calm as ever.

Suddenly, there was a rustling in the bushes next to him. I kept the hand gun trained on his silhouette, but moved my eyes to see two figures appear from the trees at a running pace. _Dammit, we were outnumbered._

"Bell?" one of them nearly screamed.

"Dammit O," the man called Bell rolled his eyes. "I told you to stay at camp."

"We heard noises," said the other woman. "Thought you were in trouble. Guess we were right."

"Not now, Princess," said the man.

By now, my father was off of the forest floor, a red bruise beginning to form on his chin. I didn't know who to train the gun at, so I just kept it on the man who tried to kill my father in the first place.

"Monty?" one of the women questioned. "Is that you?"

I took my eyes off of Bell and gazed at the blonde woman with ice blue eyes. She was breathing heavily from trekking the thick forest. Next to her stood another woman, maybe a few years younger with dark brown hair and dark eyes. "Clarke?" I asked.

I lowered the gun; a warrant for Clarke's arrest was buzzing through Arkadia. The headlines regarding her claimed that she was to be taken into custody under alleged treason after her father revealed the true intent of the Progressives all over the media. In a way, I knew that she was running from the same thing I was. I wasn't expecting it, but she came up to me boldly and hugged me close. "It's so good to see you."

Clarke and I weren't really friends, but we shared classes with each other two or so years ago. We were different ages, but my teachers moved me up in all my science classes, so we shared biology and chemistry together. We even did a project together once! She was more the type to do the field work, whereas I was perfectly comfortable taking down the data and computing it. Needless to say, we made a pretty good team.

Finally, I hugged her back and said, "It's good to see you too, Clarke."

When we broke apart, she looked to my father and stuck out her hand a little bit reluctantly. _Did she trust us?_ "Clarke Griffin, pleasure to meet you…?"

"Benjamin, but everyone calls me Ben. Your parents are Jake and Abby, right?" my dad should her hand back.

"Yes sir, they are," Clarke answered a little stiffly.

The two other people who looked to be brother and sister stood a little ways away as Clarke attempted to form a bond with my dad.

"Please, no need to call me 'sir,' Ben will be just fine. I actually worked with your dad a few times back on the Ark. You were just a little tike back then," my dad smiled.

I wasn't even friends with Clarke, but this felt so embarrassing to hear my dad say 'little tike.'

"Do you two know Bellamy and Octavia?" Clarke then asked, gesturing for the two people behind her to come forward.

I gladly shook Octavia's hand, but refused to take Bellamy's. He didn't look like the type to shake hands anyway. My dad did the same, exchanging a polite hello with the younger sister.

I gave my dad a sideways glance as we all stood there in relative silence. "Dad, your lip is bleeding!" _Man, I hated blood. I hated seeing people bleed, especially a loved one._

"I can clean that up for you if you want sir…. Ben. Sorry," Clarke stuttered. "We have supplies – food, water, some meds. My mom taught me a few things before we left."

"I wouldn't mind that Clarke," my dad said.

"So what are you two even doing out here anyway?" asked Bellamy.

 _God, this man was nosy._ "They killed my mother," I finally admitted. My dad put a reassuring hand on my shoulder and all eyes were on me, but I held my ground against Bellamy who looked neither sad nor surprised. From that moment, I could feel a bond of respect between us.

At that, Octavia came up and engulfed me in a warm embrace, "Same here," was all she whispered as she offered me all the comfort she could muster up. I could sense that her brother was uncomfortable with this, but I all I could feel was relief that I could live with my mother's death and be able to say it out loud.

 _Clarke POV (Present):_

"Alright, hold it steady… Pull back the drawstring as far as you can… Good! Now, move your drawing hand to the far corner of your mouth, aim and shoot!" I instructed.

Unfortunately, Monty didn't quite hit the moving target. He actually ended up scaring it off. Again.

"Oh forget it, Clarke!" Monty shouted. "I'm never gonna be able to do this. I give up already! Bows and arrows are clearly not my calling."

"Why?" I simply asked. "You got pretty good with a gun somehow, didn't you?"

I mean, it's not like my archery skills just came to me. It took nearly two years to perfect my kill shot on a stagnant target, and nearly two and a half more years to even hit a moving target.

"Because… I don't know. I just – I just… can't. I'm not like you or Bellamy," Monty said.

All of a suddenly, I felt a pang of sadness and guilt course through my veins. _Am I being too hard on him? He does seem a bit irascible today…_

"I'm sorry," I said with a defeated tone. "It's probably my fault. I've never been a really good teacher."

"It's fine, Clarke. It's not you," said Monty. "I'm just… ugh."

"Didn't I tell you not to drink last night?" I snickered.

"Yesssssss, but that's not it."

"C'mon, sit down. Let's take a break. Do you wanna talk about it?" I asked.

He handed me my beautiful sixty-two inch recurve bow and sat down up against a nearby tree.

I slung the arrow quiver across my back and laid the bow across my lap. I then handed Monty a bottle of lukewarm water and an apple that I grabbed before leaving camp this morning.

I recalled this morning vividly. When I went to go wake up Monty, I had passed Bellamy on the way, who looked to be staring at nothing with deep circles under his eyes. _Poor guy needs some sleep._ To break his concentration, I had lightly set my hand on his shoulder and told him to go to bed with a soft smile. Granted, he said no being as how it was already somewhat light outside and because he is as stubborn as a mule. With that, I made the bold mood to give him a light kiss on the cheek, much like the one he gave me on my temple. He didn't smile at me, but I could see his eyes light up for a brief second.

As a precaution, I woke up both Monty and Ben, so that Ben could possibly persuade Bellamy to get some sleep.

We had been away from camp for about four hours. We checked all of the traps and was lucky enough to get a couple rabbits and squirrels and so far, I've shot nearly three rabbits. We're in luck today, even though it would be nice to have more; our luck has still been better than other days, that's for sure.

After taking a bite of the apple myself, I said, "Talk."

"I heard you and Octavia talking last night," he simply stated.

"What about it?"

"Well, what if something bad does happen to you or dad?" he asked.

Oh, not this again. "Monty, I'm not going anywhere. I'll be with you guys until the end. And your dad is a survivor, he will be absolutely fine. I promise. In fact," I stated while holding out my little finger. "I pinky promise."

"Aren't we a little old to be doing pinky promises?" he asked with the playfulness returning to his voice.

"Just do it and we can leave," I said with a smirk.

Right before he was about to bring his hand up to mine to do the childish act, there was a crashing noise in the trees near us.

And then it happened again.

And again.

It was consistent and as it neared closer and closer, it sounded less like crashing and more like trudging.

In this moment, I realized that the noises were coming from the Progressives.

Monty must've noticed my change in mood for he mirrored my actions as sudden realization came crashing down on him.

I panicked for a split second. _Okay, calm down. They're still a ways away. Too close to risk running from, though. We could just hide it out, but they'll find the others._

"Oh good lord. Thought we were gonna be done with these bastards for a while. But, no! Of course we aren't" I turned my worry into frustration.

Monty just stared at me with obvious confusion etched in his face.

"Never mind. Just switch me," I said, handing him bow and quiver as he gave me a set of throwing knives. "I don't remember giving these to you."

"That's cause Bellamy kinda gave them to me," Monty said with guilt for selling out his friend.

"Bellamy gave you MY throwing knives? Oh hell no!" I was going to have a long talk with Bellamy after this. "Just get in the tree and stay out of sight. I promise this won't take long. You're a better judge than I am, so how many do you suppose there are?" I asked as I gave Monty a boost to climb the tree.

Thankfully, he didn't argue and just said, "Sounds like maybe ten, probably less. But definitely more than six."

"Good. If you catch something that I don't, use the bow. But be cautious. I know you know how to use it, but for God's sake, please do NOT hit me!"

"Wouldn't dream of it," he said. "Just be careful, ya hear?"

"You know me."

"Exactly, that's why I have to remind you!" He said while positioning himself in the tree.

I smirked and rushed to hide behind another tree a couple of feet away from the one Monty was situated in.

As I awaited the upcoming threat, I began to think about what surprises they'd bring this lovely morning! The Progressives usually carried some type of modified hand gun that's usually set to stun. I have witnessed a few accounts of when it has been set to kill though, so there was never a time I wasn't careful around them.

They were in my line of sight now. There were about eight of them. It was an okay number. I've taken more down by myself before, but it was still enough to make me feel a tad bit on edge.

They came closer.

 _Let them come to me. Stay out of sight. Attack from behind. Good, plan of action is set in motion… now!_

I hopped out from behind the tree and started chucking knife after knife.

All five knives hit their targets, right in the eye. _Five down, three to go._

The remaining Progressives simultaneously turned around and began to shoot. One of them was using actual bullets and I hoped that it wouldn't attract more of them or something much worse, like humans. I had no problem dismantling robots, but killing a human was still a foreign concept to me.

I dodged their bullets and waves of electricity that came my way. I was able to run up to one of them who was reloading and did my signature roundhouse kick to the head. As its head flew from the rest of its body, I swiftly grabbed one of the knives and threw it at the farthest one from me.

It was at this point in time that I heard two things – the sound of a gunshot and the noise an arrow makes when being shot from a bow.

Still slightly bent down on the ground, I saw the metallic arrow enter the robot's head _. Atta boy._

As I attempted to get up, I could feel something warm beginning to pull me back to reality. To stop myself from collapsing on the ground right then and there, I put my hands on my knees and began to take deep breaths as to look like I was just catching my breath and not trying to keep myself upright. The damn robot shot me in the side; it was no 'shoot to kill' shot but it didn't draw blood.

 _Don't let him know. I'll fix it when we get back to camp. I know how he is with blood. I mean, if I'm going to pass out, I don't need him to do the same. Picked a mighty good day to actually wear this jacket, maybe he won't see the blood. Fingers crossed._

"C'mon," I said, trying to sound as normal as possible with a bullet lodged into my side. "We need to go and warn the others before more show up."

"You're right. Hey, you okay?" he asked.

To prove my point of 'being okay,' I stood up all the way and smiled as best as I could. "Course! Let's just hurry back, ya know? By the way, nice shot! Proud of you," I said, attempting to steer the conversation away from myself. _God, just standing up hurt like a bitch!_

"Thanks!"

Finally, after about an hour of walking and discreetly holding my side, we arrives back at the camp. For the majority of the trip back, there was hardly any talking, and when I started slowing down, I told Monty to just trail ahead but to keep within earshot.

To my pure luck, he didn't seem to notice a thing.

As I got closer to camp, I could hear the voices of my peers, assuming that Monty was already there.

"Where's Clarke?" someone asked. Not surprisingly at all, this someone sounded much like Bellamy.

"Here!" I shouted while walking into the camp ground.

It didn't take long at all until I was engulfed into a bone-crushing embrace by Octavia.

Had I not been as exhausted as I was, I would've shoved her away quick as lightning, but circumstances had changed. And even though her hug hurt like hell, it was much appreciated.

"Hey," started Octavia. "You okay? You look paler than usual.

Yeah, I'm fine. Just a bit shaken, and hungry. There'll be time for that later, though. We gotta move. Now."

"What? Why?" piped in Jasper.

"The Progressives. They were on their way here and one of them fired off a round, so there's no doubt that more will be coming," I said.

"Luckily, we were far enough from here to where they can't immediately find a trail to us," said Monty ever so strategically.

"So what do we do? Where're we headed?" asked Jasper.

"We're sticking with the same plan; go to Raven's Inn. Should only be a few days' journey if we stick to a schedule," I tactfully said. "But we're just gonna travel down by the river until we hit another town. Does that sound good to you all?"

Everyone nodded in agreement and we all got to packing.

Thankfully, it didn't take long to pack all the essentials, so we were off within thirty minutes.

It also seemed like no one seemed to notice the wound in my side. Granted, I still hadn't been able to tend to it, but I wasn't passed out or dead yet, so it couldn't have been that bad, right? Thankfully, the blood wasn't visible under my jacket yet, so people just kept assuming that I was dehydrated or tired, which was fine.

Hopefully, I could just breeze by what was left of today and drop the bomb on them later when we were out of harm's way. Preferably, if my plan goes right – which it usually doesn't – Jasper will end up being the only one to know of my little injury. _Him and his damn "extensive" medical knowledge. Ugh._

"Hey Bell?" I asked. "Take the front? You know where we're going, right?"

"Uh, yeah, sure," he stated with a hint of questioning in it. "You okay, Princess?"

"Yeah, just a little distracted," I said back while trying to form a smile.

"Why were you trailing so far behind Monty when you guys got back?" he interrogated, while crossing his muscle-y arms across his chest. If it were any other time, I would've spent more time starring at his biceps, but didn't want his wandering gaze to decipher what I was hiding.

Instead of answering, I gave him a look that said in itself that we would talk later.

Aside from running into our second biggest threat and getting shot, this is turning out to be a pretty decent and lucky day.

"Have your weapons ready, just in case," I said loudly enough for everyone to here.

Giving a nod to Bellamy, we began our trek to God-knows-where for the night. _Just a couple more hours and I could rest._

It had been two hours and I was tired and frustrated. I guess the pain finally decided to sink in after all the adrenaline wore off because it was making itself plain and clear to me now. Thankfully, Bellamy was staying in his respectable position and not playing detective with me. There was only a few times that he looked back and silently asked if I needed a break.

Ben had, no doubt, been by Monty's side the majority of the time, considering he could've lost his son today in the ten percent chance that we couldn't hold our own.

Jasper and Octavia were talking, but as they seemed to get further into depth with their conversation, they had inched so close together where they were now holding hands. I smiled at the thought of something better than good actually happening today. I don't quite know what happened to cause it, but she sounded happy, and he did as well from what little snippets I caught.

In my absent-mindedness, I hadn't realized that Octavia dropped back to come and talk to me.

"Hey!" She happily exclaimed.

"Hi O," I said, definitely lacking all enthusiasm.

"You okay? You seem a bit down since you've gotten back," she said.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired. Really tired," I muttered.

"No, it can't be that. Even when you're tired, you're in a better mood," she sassed. "And you can't be hungover because you barely drank last night…"

 _And of course, she had to be right_. "O, really," I began. "I'm fine." I even threw in a little smile to aid in the act. "Talk to me. I saw you two holding hands and y'all definitely seem happier now. Something happen last night?"

"Well," she started. "We just kinda talked and he admitted his feelings for me, so I did the same. Please don't tell Bell though, I don't even want to think about how he'll react."

"I'm glad that you two decided to stop fooling yourselves!" I exclaimed. "And don't worry, I won't tell Bellamy, but you have to do it sometime soon."

"Well, yeah," she giggled. "I just need to figure out a way to word it to where he won't overreact and get mad."

"Since when has that ever worked out?" I asked, thinking of all the boys Octavia and I would hang out with. I'm positive that he hated them all and did everything in his power to steer them away from us.

"Ain't that the damn truth," Octavia sighed.

After that, she dove into the things her and Jasper talked about between last night to about an hour ago and I couldn't be anymore annoyed with it. After listening about their lovey-dovey conversations for what felt like an hour, I held little interest in hearing anymore of it. And to make matters worse, I could feel myself begin to stumble over my own two feet and began to sweat. By the time she turned back to me, at least a thin coat of sweat was now fully covering my body.

"So, where did you go?" Octavia asked me, obviously inviting me back into the conversation we were having. "I mean, last night? You didn't come back into the tent."

"Oh," I said, my voice a bit shaky. _God, it felt like my side was burning a hole through me._ "Bell relieved me of watch and told me to go lay down in their tent."

"Aww, how nice of him!" She all but yelled.

"Yeah… Look, I'm not really in the mood for talking right now, so just go back to Jasper or something please." I curtly said. I mean, I love Octavia, but she can talk for forever and not even notice if the other person had totally checked out of the conversation or not. Plus, my current physical state wasn't helping my blunt mood.

"Well, fine. Ms. Cranky ass," Octavia huffed. I kind of had it coming.

She started to walk away from me like there was no tomorrow. Me being me, I figured that I shouldn't have acted the way I did and planned on telling her that. _Damn empathy!_ "O, wait up," I said while trying to catch up to her as soon as I could before she got too close to everyone else.

When coming up with my revelation, I hadn't anticipated the root sticking up from the ground. Before I could keep myself from doing so, I fell. And to make matters worse, it was on my wounded side. The impact of the fall had increased the pain in my side tenfold as I could now hear myself letting out a screech of pain and felt tears brewing in my eyes.

I had never felt pain as bad as this in my entire life. I tried keeping my eyes shut, hoping that this was all just some messed up dream.

I could now feel all eyes go to me rather than see them. My chest tightened up with each ragged breathe I took and I could now feel the warm blood begin to seep through my jacket.

"Clarke, what happened?" someone asked in a concerned tone.

I finally got enough strength in me to roll off my side, causing a whole new wave of pain to crash over me that made me feel light-headed.

The person standing above seemed to have finally noticed this and said, "Oh my- GUYS, get over here, now! Something's happened!"

 _Ben, I think._

"Ben…" I muttered.

"Shh," He said. "Don't talk. Just hold my hand and stay awake, okay?"

The next thing I knew, I was surrounded by the rest of the group. I couldn't make out distinct features or voices as they all seemed to topple over me. Someone else tried grabbing my other hand and I recognized the calloused and tanned hands of Bellamy.

"O, get her jacket off. I would do it, but if she remembers this, then she might think I'm some kinda perv and hit me again" said Jasper, trying to make a joke even though I could hear him going into doctor mode.

"Not a good time to joke around, Jasper," Octavia said. Seeing as how she was the only other girl in the group, it was easy to tell her from the rest. Suddenly, I felt something being lifted from my front top half. My jacket.

 _I can't let them see!_

"Wait, guys. It's cool. I'm fine," I tried to coax them, but I couldn't even convince myself as Octavia was able to get the zipper fully off.

"Oh, no," piped in Monty.

 _Secret's out, I guess._

"Well, it looks like the bullet went all the way through, which is good, but she's losing a lot of blood," said Jasper. To me, his voice started to slur and his words seemed to be mush in my ears. "We need to get to higher ground and get her fixed up, fast."

"Can you walk?" Asked a concerned Ben.

"Whaaaa-," I said, confused by what he was asking of me.

"I'll carry her," a distinct voice in the crowd said. Bellamy.

"The sooner we settle this, the better. Let's go!" said Monty.

I felt strong, warm arms go around my lower torso and the back of my knee. "Bell…" I began.

"It's gonna be okay, Princess. Everything's gonna be okay," he reassured while holding me close.

"Okay…" I said as I rested my head against the crook of his neck and shoulder. With that, I felt darkness finally consume me. All the warmth that wafted from his body now felt very distant as the cold set in.

 **As always, please leave me some comments on my story! Thank you all for reading! :)**


	4. How to Save a Life

**Author's Note: Hello everyone, good to be back! Here is chapter four that features Jasper' flashback as well as Bellamy's present point of view. The story will mostly follow Clarke, but it's important to hear some of Bellamy's thoughts as he is the second main character. This chapter is a well-known song by "The Fray."**

 **This chapter is very fast-moving - it captures 2 years worth of history for Jasper, but I hoped that I was able to keep him in character and keep the story interesting. :)**

 **As always, I really hope you all enjoy the chapter and PLEASE LET ME KNOW through review/follow/favorite. Thank you :)**

 _Chapter 4: How to Save a Life_

 _Jasper's POV (Flashback):_

The good old days of high school were completely behind me. Sometimes I missed smoking random things that random people gave me; but looking back on the past, I'm glad to have gone down the path of righteousness. At this point in my young life, I was almost done with the residency training that Arkadia makes us go through to become doctors. Even just five years ago, I never would have guessed to become a doctor for our community. I knew I wanted to help people, but didn't know how to apply that to a job to support myself.

My parents and I came from a very poor background, and in Arkadia socio-economic status was hard to change. The higher ups thought that lower-class citizens were too lazy, and the lower-class thought that the upper-class were too entitled. Both on the Ark and down on the ground, both with Chancellor Jaha and Pike, status was hard to change.

Even though the people of the Ark grieved for Chancellor Jaha and his son's passing, the rise of Arkadia was an exciting prospect. With Chancellor Pike, the government was ran differently – the counsel was dismembered and people were given more of a say in the politics. Yet, the class issue was still an issue that was constantly overlooked.

When I came to this revelation, I had chosen to pursue a medical career, not as a nurse, but as a doctor. This decision was originally out of spite, and as I worked my way up the ranks, I wanted to bring attention to the lower-class citizens of Arkadia. I realized doing so would take too long, so I liked to think of myself as full time doctor, and part time social justice warrior.

Personally, I liked the ring to it, but our medical trainers did not. After each prospective resident finished their official schooling, they needed to complete a residency under a training specialist. When the trainers saw me, they immediately shunned away from me; they recognized the look of a lower-class citizen and didn't feel the need to waste their time on someone who was just going to be cleaning up their messes soon. _Talk about no discrimination in the work zone._

I went one month without a resident trainer, before someone finally recognized that I had potential. The person who recognized me wasn't a trainer per se, but the chief of St. Jaha's Medical Center – Abby Griffin, one of the Ark's most trusted citizens and Arkadia's most senior medical physician.

"Why me?" I had asked several times.

"Because I see you," she would say. I guess not all upper-class people were entitled.

After about six months of training in St. Jaha's emergency room, I still didn't know if I wanted to specialize in any one particular area of study. Pediatrics and taking care of children was a wonderful experience and same with cardiology and neurology. I just couldn't pick one subject that really stood out to me and I went to Abby about this:

"I don't know what to specialize in. I love taking care of both kids and adults. I love cardiology as much as neurology. I love setting bones just as much as taking samples of tissue. I just don't know what to do!" I exclaimed. This was all just so stressful.

"Well, you could stay in the ER, you know that, right?" Abby had calmly stated. "On the Ark, I was the only doctor for a very long time. Sure, I had my nurses, but they could only help so much," Abby stated her story. "I was only one person, so training other individuals to be doctors was difficult and because of the sporadic scheduling, a lot of them quit. I learned to do a lot of procedures and diagnoses by myself. Jasper, I have never met a student as willing to help others as you are. Not only are you a good person, you are a good doctor – you know how to catch and observe behaviors of the people who come in here, prescribe them medicine, and send them off to the right specialists."

She paused for a long time, so I asked, "Ma'am?"

"Stay in the ER. We need more people like you there," she stated simply.

And I couldn't agree more. The idea of being an ER doctor suddenly made my heart race and I felt excited to have this profession. This was the one point of my career where I felt like I was doing more for myself as opposed to social justice. The thought felt good. This way, I could help people who couldn't otherwise afford to be helped by a specialist.

My specialty is to help people.

I was going to tell Dr. Griffin that I wanted to formally accept her offer, but someone interrupted me at this time. "Dr. Griffin, we need you," said a man named Jackson. I believe he was mentored by Dr. Griffin as well.

"I'm a bit busy, Jackson," she said in an annoyed tone. "Can you get someone else to take care of it?"

"No, Abby. We need _you_ ," Jackson repeated once again, giving Doctor Griffin the _you-should-know-what-I'm-talking-about_ eyes.

I gauged her reaction and her feelings of understanding finally showed through. "Oh," was all she stated. And then, "Jackson, stay here. If anyone asks where I am, tell them I am doing paperwork."

"I know the drill," said Jackson, like this had been rehearsed before.

"Jasper," she turned to my stunned looking face. "I need you to come with me but you need to not say anything to anyone, okay?" she said to me.

I just nodded my head and followed her out of her office door. We grabbed a basic first-aid kit from one of the supply closets and started heading down the flights of stairs to the first floor. However, we passed the door to the first floor and continued on our trek. "You have to promise that you will not tell anyone what I'm about to show you," Abby stated.

I thought this over in my head, debating if I should trust her and myself to keep whatever was going on between us. On instinct, "I promise, Dr. Griffin."

We walked into a closed off room. It was set up like the Emergency Room was but with significantly less technology and supplies. It was occupied by only one person; I didn't know who this person was but I could clearly see the tattoos and tanned skin of a Grounder woman. "What is she doing here?" I said with concern in my voice. After all, the Grounders were responsible for the death of the Jaha Family.

"C'mon, you need to help me with this," said Dr. Griffin.

"What? I'm not going to help with anything until you tell me what's going on!" I screamed. I felt bad for yelling at my mentor, but I couldn't imagine myself helping people that have killed so many others.

Abby looked conflicted between helping the patient immediately and telling me the truth. "We help those in need. Even Grounders," she stated while walking over to the patient. "Hey, hon. How are you doing? My name is Dr. Griffin, but you can just call me Abby. Can you tell me where it hurts?" she said in a kind bed-side manner.

"M-my leg… and my stomach," she timidly said.

At that, I could see Abby slowly moving her hands toward her leg first. Slowly but surely, I inched my way towards Abby and the unknown girl. Her dark eyes were calm, but there was a slight tremble to her whole body. She was probably scared shitless to be around us.

"Hi," I said coming up on the side of the bed that Abby wasn't on. "My name is Jasper, what is yours?"

"Luna," the girl stated simply.

"Can you tell us what happened?" I asked her as Abby put pressure on different areas of Luna's leg. One particular area made her jump back in pain and squeeze her eyes shut. I grabbed her hand for comfort.

"Hairline fracture on the fibula," Abby muttered.

"I was walking through forests I was not familiar with. There was a root I tripped over, and I fell into a rock," she stated as Abby moved onto the next of her injuries.

"Luna, we need you to let us lift your shirt up," Abby stated.

Luna looked to me a bit worriedly. I could tell she was uncomfortable with me seeing her body, so I turned around to face the other direction. My hand was still wrapped around her fingers and the only indication she gave when in pain was her tightening grip.

"Minimal bruising on her ribs. No fractures," Dr. Griffin stated. "Jasper, check the first-aid kit, see if we can't give her a few pain killers for the next couple of days."

I let go of Luna's hand to reach for the first-aid kit. "All we have is some Motrin and Ibuprofen," I said. I wish we could give this woman more, but they would still be of some help.

"The best we can spare is a few pills to manage the pain and…." Abby searched behind her. "And crutch for your leg." I could tell even Abby was disappointed with the limited resources we were offering, but Luna looked grateful as is.

"Thank you Abby and Jasper of Skaikru," Luna simply stated. "You are both good people."

After that experience, Abby told me that only her and Jackson knew about the medical treatment of the Grounders and asked if I wanted to add that as a responsibility of mine. "You trust me enough for that?" I asked a bit skeptically.

"Jasper, I would trust you with my family's life if the opportunity presented itself."

For the next year, I continued doing my usual work in the ER, while occasionally assisting Dr. Griffin or Dr. Jackson with Grounder patients. One day, I thought to myself, how could I ever hate such a calm people? I learned so much with them: how to communicate without speaking English, bedside manner, helping others with minimal equipment, and so much more.

Unfortunately, this was also during a time of great stress put on everyone. Tensions among camp were high; this medical center put priority of injury above all, but Pike's officers took advantage of their positions and used their status to get bandaged up before the common folk. Resentfully, Abby let it happen and we served them as such, but we were never happy about it. Neither were the many other patients who needed to wait "x" amount of hours because of the idiocy and entitlement of Pike's men.

The social justice warrior in me came out more and more every day as I continued aiding our people as well as the peaceful Grounders who we found before they did. I liked helping the people who deserved my help opposed to those who did not deserve my priority. Within time, I networked with people who felt the same way, and together we got more and more people to agree with us. Because she was the chief of the medical center, Dr. Griffin could not openly agree with us, but I could see her smiling on the sidelines nonetheless.

My group got so big that we held hospital-wide strikes, refusing to treat Pike's officers until everyone else before them was helped. Some of the officers – the kind ones – were okay with this arrangement and secretly gave us their support. However, the other ill-minded officers were nothing short of pissed at us when we refused to serve them first.

Later down the road, we held strikes to not aid the officers at all until the end of the work day. And then we held strikes to refuse to service them at all for the backlash we constantly received from them.

People should really be nicer to those who can keep them from dying.

Chancellor Pike tried to get involved and contact Abby. He told her to make us stop and she would relay to us what he said, but this was out of her control. She fully knew this, claiming to Pike that we were a forced to be reckoned with.

One day, Abby Griffin did not come into work. Working under her for the past two years, I learned that she never skipped a day of work – if the day was a holiday, she would come in. If it was her daughter's birthday, she would still come in. So, when Dr. Griffin did not report to work, I knew first hand that something was wrong.

"You've got to see this," said Jackson only a mere hour later. "This was broadcasted two hours ago."

He showed me a video posted to our emergency broadcast channel, "Whoa," I stated. "Is that Mr. Griffin?" This was all so confusing.

The video was a mere two minutes if that in which he explained to all of Arkadia that the Progressives, once used to service us, were modified by Chancellor Pike to enslave us and other Grounder nations should that course of action be needed. His video was a call to action to rise above and overthrow Pike without speaking those treasonous words.

This was the opportunity I was looking for, but I realistically thought about the fact that Chancellor Pike had strength in numbers, both with his robots and with his loyal officers.

Next up on the emergency broadcast was a picture of Abby's daughter, Clarke. I had never met her, but they shared similar features. "There is a warrant out for Clarke Griffin's arrest. If you know any of her whereabouts, alert the authorities immediately. She is to be taken into custody on the act of treason and anyone who withholds information of her whereabouts will be tried as accessory to treason," the monotone broadcaster alerted. _Guess I know why Abby didn't make it into work this morning._

Still, life resumed and we did our jobs. Alerts about Clarke Griffin continued and neither Abby nor Jake Griffin were reachable. Some of my coworkers even said that the Griffins were being placed under house arrest by the Progressives.

That didn't stop our strikes though; if anything, the recent news only increased our want to not serve Pike's officers. Doctors are supposed to be level-headed, but I was angry. I had never been so angry in my life at our retched government. Something needed to change and something needed to change now.

It was another three months before we received more bad news.

"Guys," one of the female residents rushed toward Jackson and I. "We have a problem."

"What's going on?" I said immediately. Somehow, I knew that this news would be worse than anything having to do with the Griffin scandal.

"Rumor has it that Pike's men are going around and beating and killing all of the doctors involved in the strikes that have been going on," she said hurriedly.

"What?" I asked, full well knowing what she was saying. "Three of my ER residents didn't come in to work today, no previous word of it…" I mumbled more to myself than the little group we were in.

"They're aiming for people who were leaders of the strike…" she continued on. "Jasper, that includes you too. You have to leave. Get out of here, now!"

Before, I had never had to ask for time off to leave work early, but now it was unavoidable as I took off my lab coat and simply walked out of our breakroom door. "Be cool Jasper, just be cool," I said to myself while walking towards an exit of our camp. _I can do this, just stay calm._

After taking care of so many Grounders with Abby, she showed me a secret exit to get out of camp without any guards seeing. Being distracted with trying to stay out of the limelight, I didn't even see that there were guards who recognized me coming my way. I had passed them, but now they were clearly following me.

 _Fuck, fuck, fuck. What now?_ I tried to keep my head down, but I was breathing harder than ever – it almost felt like I was hyperventilating. _If you run, you're committing a felony, if you don't run, you get beaten to death. But you've grown up here, you don't know what's out there! If you go out there, you might just die from getting beaten or slaughtered out there!_ My inner monologue was of absolutely no help today as my mind raced to catch up with my thoughts. _Now or never, Jasper._

I took one last deep breath and began to run as fast as I could carry myself. "Hey! Stop there!" I could hear the guards screaming at me. I reluctantly made my way towards the intended exit and flawlessly slipped through the fence of Arkadia. _They're probably gonna patch that up now, dammit_. I wished so badly I could apologize to Jackson and Abby for that, but who knows when and if that would ever happen?

I made my way towards the forest surrounding Arkadia and dashed through the thick trees. There were no hunting traps on this side of the camp, but I remained cautious of the overgrown roots and thorn bushes that lined the ways.

I ran and I ran, and I ran some more. I was so unaware of the amount I could run and very impressed with myself! In my reverie and sheer tiredness of running for what felt like hours, I was not paying attention to my surroundings and almost ran into a sharp tree branch. My body missed it, but the swing in my left arm did not. I could feel the penetration of my skin and the blood that began to run down my forearm.

 _Don't stop, not now!_

I kept going further and further into the woods until nightfall.

 _You're a god damn doctor, you should know better to treat that wound right now!_

It was midday when I began my trek, and it was nearing dusk now. Hopefully, this would be a good stopping point for the day. At this point, I was able to get a better look at it and could see that the cut ran all the way from wrist to forearm. Some of it was already closed up, but the part of the wound that wasn't closed up needed sutures or cauterizing. I didn't have the tools to preform either of the procedures. Right now, I just needed sleep. I could practically hear the sweet embrace of sleep calling to me.

There was a fair chance that if I slept now, I would not wake up, but the more tired part of me was willing to take that sacrifice.

Just as I was about to lose all of my senses, I could hear multiple crunching leaves. This was either the sound of an animal coming to eat me or a human coming to probably kill me. I was already dying of blood loss if I couldn't suture myself, so if someone or something was simply coming to make the ride to death that much easier, I would let it happen at this point. "Help," I hoped I was loud enough to hear. "Help," I tried again. My voice was ragged from lack of water and the beginning stages of dehydration. "Somebody, please… help."

The crunching leaves became sporadic; when I wasn't talking, they started up, but they stopped whenever I did say something. _It could simply be a bear_. I was going to call out once more, but was stopped by a gravely female voice, "Oh God Bellamy… Help me over here!" she nearly screamed. "Hey, hey," she said in a softer tone. "Hey, I'm here. I can help you, don't give up. What's your name?" she frantically asked.

I opened my eyes a crack and saw the look of worry on her face. She was a very pretty woman; even covered in dirt and grime, I could make out the pale white face and straight blonde hair. I know I couldn't see her well because of the twilight but I was able to search out a sense of helpfulness in her features. "Jasper, Jasper Jordan," I said.

"It's nice to meet you Jasper, can you tell me why you're here?" she asked as her traveling companion finally made his way over to us. In comparison to her, he was tall and tan, with very dark curly hair – he was this woman's opposite.

"I need water and sutures for my arm or else it'll need to be cauterized," even though I was exhausted, I still went into my doctor mode. "I'm a doctor, I can walk you through this."

"We need to get him back to camp," the woman said.

"We can't, he'll know where we're at. What if he was sent out here to scout us?" the man with obvious trust issues said.

"Bellamy," the woman looked back to him with firmness in her voice. "We have to help him."

 _Bellamy POV (Present):_

We were able to make camp on the side of one of the mountains. I would've liked to be higher up, but Clarke was my main priority right now. Carrying her through the thick brush as Ben lead the way, only one thing ran through my mind: _How could I miss all of the signs?_

I had known this woman for several years now. She started out as my sister's best friend, but we became inseparable since then. If I was being cheesy, she was the Yin to my Yang. In our little group, we had spats everyday about who should be leading what. I had control issues and she had control issues; but when one of us was not feeling up to the task, the other would pick up the slack. In this case, I was willing to pick up the slack, but I should've asked or blatantly known why.

She was acting so strange when she came back with Monty, how could I not catch this?

Currently, Jasper and I were in a tent with Clarke's unconscious body. As far as I knew, Octavia, Monty and Ben were reluctantly waiting outside.

Even when I had to let go of Clarke's cold body, I still held onto her hand, hoping that she would grasp it. I need you, Clarke. Please wake up. I just wanted my princess to sass me about holding her hand too tight or being too much in her body space, but nothing. Jasper was just finishing up stitching Clarke's side when he said, "Her wound is clean, but I can't determine if an infection will set in. We just need to make sure we change the bandages if bloods seeps through," Jasper felt the top of her forehead. "She has a slight fever… could be sign of an infection. We need to keep that fever down as much as possible until it breaks, okay? Hey, are you even listening to me?"

Truthfully, I wasn't listening too much until he demanded my attention. I just looked at him and stared daggers into his face.

"Don't give me that look, Blake," Jasper said. "What I'm telling you is for Clarke, so pay attention and keep her fever down until it breaks. Do you want her to risk infection?" Jasper sure did know how to put me in my place in this moment. He must've been taking lessons from Clarke.

"I'm sorry, Jasper," I said in a solemn tone.

"It's okay dude," Jasper reassured. "I know you care for Clarke, we all see the way you look at her."

"How do I look at her?" I inquired. I didn't even realize that I was looking at her.

"You look at her as if… as if she's the most important person in the room – hell, even the only person in the room. You love her, don't you?" Jasper pressed on. I did not answer him at first. So, he continued with, "Bellamy loves Clarke, Bellamy loves Clarke," in a sing-song voice.

"Yes," I simply stated, ruining his humorous mood. "I do. So much," I said with vehemence in my voice. "Just don't tell anyone yet."

"Well, tell her at least," Jasper said. I hated him for knowing my secret, but couldn't help my mind from praising his wise advice. I also received no verbal confirmation with whether or not he would keep my secret.

I didn't want to talk about this right now, so instead I went with, "So you and my sister?"

At this, he lost some of his previous confidence. "Uhh… Well, I was going to talk to you about it. Ummm," Jasper fidgeted. It was amazing to see how such a collected doctor could become a hot mess of a person in mere seconds.

I laughed for only a second, but decided to end his suffering. "It's okay…" I didn't want anyone dating my sister, but if it had to be Jasper, then I supposed it would be okay. "Just… don't break Octavia's heart… or else."

My menacing tone made Jasper visibly gulp. He has seen what I can do with my bare hands to the Progressives, and it wouldn't be that hard to hurt him either. "Or else… dually noted."

After he regained himself, he said, "Would you like to stay with Clarke?"

As if he needed asking. "Yes, just tell me what I need to do."

"Let me know if she wakes up, otherwise I will be back in the morning to change her bandage. Keep her fever down and try to keep her either on her back or the side that isn't wounded," Jasper stated, back in his doctor mode.

"Thank you," I said sincerely, not just for letting me know what she needed, letting me stay, stitching her up in the first place, making Octavia happy, coming into our lives, being our doctor, etc.. This man deserved my thanks on many occasions, and he knew that. I hoped this one praise would hold him over for a while though.

That night, I barely slept a wink. I wanted to be awake when Clarke woke up and I wanted to make sure that her fever didn't burn her up too much.

At one point in the night, she began sweating. The sleeping bag was barely covering her, but she was still sweating. I knew what was coming and could hopefully tell that her fever was breaking – she wouldn't get an infection after all! To help the process, I wiped the sweaty hair out of her beautiful face. Her eyebrows were scrunched and her plump lips were slightly parted, but she was still the most graceful creature I had ever seen in my life.

My original plan was to swaddle her in the sleeping bag, but how much would that help? I was conflicted in doing so, but I sat up straight and removed my shirt. "God, I hope she doesn't fucking murder me when she's able to," I muttered to myself.

Clarke was currently rested on her back, and I was able to maneuver the both of us so that she could remain on her back and I could climb in next to her. When we were nice and situated, I threw an arm across her body and tucked her into my front. "C'mon Princess, just relax for me," I muttered.

Throughout the night, we stayed relatively in that same position. Just before dawn started to break over the horizon, I could feel her body finally relax into mine and knew that her fever had broken. "Thank you Clarke," I said and longingly kissed the top of her head.

Knowing that her fever was under control, I began to drift off myself. It was so easy to fall asleep with Clarke in my arms. The last time I held her throughout the night was after Finn Collins had cheated on her and she needed a comforting touch. Sure, I could've left her on the couch or in Octavia's room for the rest of the night and went to my own bed, but I stayed with her throughout it all. I did it back then and I was planning on doing it now. She needed me in this moment. I would be there for my princess.

The next time I woke up, it was to the comforting touch of Clarke's slender fingers rubbing into my forearm. The touch itself sent shivers down my spine and I tightened my grip around her top half. Five minutes passed, and I was going to remove my arm from around her. I could be both hurting her and creeping her out right now. When I went to do so, she grabbed my forearm and said in a husky voice, "Please, just for a few more minutes."

I could sense the worry in her voice, as if my embrace held all of her emotions together in this moment in time. "Anything for you, Princess." _Absolutely anything._

She continued to stroke my forearm as I cuddled her side. Eventually, she laid her head down against my chest, reciprocating the same comfort I had given to her. Even though there was imminent danger that awaited us, we basked in the moment of giving and receiving comfort long overdue.

 **As always, review/favorite/follow this piece! Thanks for reading :)**


	5. Into the Woods

**Author's Note: Hello everyone, it's good to be back! :) Here is your fifth chapter. I decided to do something a little different and follow through with my saying that the story would be nonlinear. This whole chapter will be Clarke's dedicated flashback and we get insight into how she got dragged into all of this and briefly what she was like before a shit load of stress got dumped on her. For our heroes, THIS is the beginning. Timeline wise, this takes place during Jasper's flashback when his and the other hospital residents see the emergency broadcast. We actually get to hear the emergency broadcast in all it's glory! There is also a slight mention of Monty, but not by name - let me know if you catch it! :)**

 **Also, you will be happy to know that I have the next chapter written. It is yet again written through Clarke's perspective set in present time. The next chapter is actually the companion to this - it was supposed to all be one big chapter, but that would've been like 8000 words on its own.**

 **The title of this comes from one of my favorite musicals that goes by the same name. Give a listen! And with that, please follow, favorite, review or even PM me. I love hearing whatever suggestions you might have for the story. Enjoy the chapter. :)**

 _Chapter 5: Into the Woods_

 _Clarke's POV (Flashback):_

It was no doubt that the ground was inexplicably boring. The Ark's technology allowed us the absolute essentials. Besides that, there was little form of entertainment to partake in. One could only read so many books from the small, ungrowing library; one could only practice their martial arts methods before it became almost robotic; one could only play outside in the fresh air before seeing it all. That is, except for drawing.

From a very young age, I took up art as a form of stress management – yes, ten-year olds can be stressed out too – and it just stuck with me. Dad called me a natural born artist and said Arkadia would need people like that to remind them of what's important. I remember smiling at him.

And right now, I smile down at my half-finished drawing of the horizon. Landscapes were my favorite to draw because while one could go outside and feel the same air on their skin or see the same trees every day, I often found that every landscape drawing I made would have to be drawn and revised every other day due to the trees 'being different' or simply how I wanted the sun to look in certain pictures. From an onlooker's position, the world could be so beautiful outside of the main gate.

The parameters of Arkadia only allowed us to see so much. I didn't know much about politics – that was more Wells' thing when he was still around and being taught by his father – but I had a few thoughts that 'Skaikru' was one of the more hated clans on the ground. Therefore, we had large and imposing gates for a reason.

Chancellor Pike saw to that. It's not as if I hated the man. No, far from. When I was younger and still living on the Ark, he taught several survival courses after we learned that it was safe to return to Earth. Not to mention, my mom and dad were close enough friends with him to where I would see him at the dinner table every other week or so, much like the Jaha father and son duo. That was, until his daughter passed away. I didn't see him much after that.

Now that I was no longer in classes anymore, I was looking for some form of a job, so to speak. My mom, the highly accredited hospital director, always offered to take me under her wing so that I could become a doctor just like her and stop working on drawings. I had thought about her offers multiple times and even studied medicine in school to make her happy. While it was a very knowledgeable class, I found that it was not a career path I could possibly stand. I had soon realized that I wanted to help people, but I just found that I couldn't do that within a hospital setting.

So instead of being productive and finding my way in this tiny cramped world, I stayed home and drew jumbled messes with charcoal and colored pencils. In Arkadia and previously on the Ark, it was customary to live with your parents until you got married, and that was when you would move out into some type of living space with your spouse. So, until I got married - which was highly unlikely to happen - I didn't have to do much. It also helped that my dad was a mechanical engineer and my mom was the director of surgery. So, I wasn't in such a rush for anything.

Of course, when I wasn't with my drawings - or pretending to look for a job - I was with Octavia and her older brother. Like any other day, I decided to pay them a visit and chat with Octavia. She was still attending prerequisite classes, so some days I would help her with homework. Her brother, Bellamy, and I shared regular classes with each other way back when, and I ended up making his acquaintance first, regretfully. If I had met Octavia first, I'm sure that I wouldn't have been as suspicious of her being obnoxious like her sibling. And she was obnoxious, but more so in a ' _what's a normal thing that teenage girls do that can really piss off my brother?_ ' Bellamy on the other hand was just plain obnoxious, at least around me. _The jackass._

"Hey O!" I exclaimed after she let me into her small housing quarters that she shared with her brother and mom. Safe to say, each of them were allowed their own room, but the house itself was smaller than the houses on my end of Arkadia. Bellamy would never let me forget that. But, I wouldn't think about him right now. "How's your studying going?"

"Bleh!" the sassy brunette exclaimed with an exaggerated fall onto her couch. She dramatically covered her eyes. "Remind me why chemistry and physics are so important?"

I laughed a little at her complaints and remembered being in the same boat when I had to take the same classes. I slowly took a seat on the couch and smiled at her approvingly. "Well, without one, you wouldn't exist; and without the other, you wouldn't be able to walk on the ground."

"Actually!" she jumped off the couch. "I would probably still exist and walk on the ground just fine, but there wouldn't be an explanation behind it," she stated matter-of-factly.

"Touché," I claimed. As a second thought, I added, "You know, I might have a friend who can help out. He's a like a year older than you, but great with this kind of stuff."

Suddenly, Bellamy ever-invasively stomped quickly into the room, almost completely ignoring me to get to the standard television set that all households were required to have. "Move it Princess," he rudely commented.

"Wow, asshole. Someone's feeling rather grumpy today. What's wrong, got your manties in a twist?" I taunted lightheartedly and smirked. _I'd have to use that one again!_

Octavia laughed from her position on the couch and curled her feet underneath her, but she slowed her chuckles to a halt when Bellamy made no jab back at me. She looked at me desperately as I stood, almost mimicking her expression. Usually when I threw a snarky comment Bellamy's way, he would retort and we would have a good laugh about it. When one or the other didn't respond so gracefully, then we knew something was wrong. Just like now. "Bell?" Octavia asked in a worried tone.

"They're about to announce something on the alert channel… sayin' that everyone needs to tune in," he merely stated. "Mom, come here a minute," he stated when he got the channel situated and the static nearly gone.

"What's wrong Bellamy?" Aurora Blake's voice sounded from her now-open bedroom door. Even she sounded worried. She was a seamstress and could work from home most of the time. Bellamy and Octavia usually knew not to disturb her when doing so.

Now I knew something was wrong.

We all gathered around the small television and within seconds, a figure appeared on the screen. "Dad?" I asked as I neared the set. I knew he couldn't hear me, and was frankly surprised that Bellamy didn't make the comment aloud. _Why would he be releasing an emergency broadcast?_

"Greetings everyone," he stated with a warm smile. _Dad, what's going on?_ "As you may or may not know, my name is Jake Griffin and I live here in Arkadia with you. Some may know me from family and formal dinners with my wife and daughter; others may know me from work; others may not know me whatsoever, and that's fine. I work as a mechanical engineer and I was actually the head developer for the Progressives – the robots we have to make our lives easier by cooking and cleaning or running errands while we earn what living we can." He took a long pause.

We didn't have any Progressive robots in our home, compared to some families that even had two of them! I had always asked dad why we couldn't have one, but he always gave me rather vague answers. I had just chalked it up to him being too modest to take part in his own creation. Whenever I finished a drawing, I often hid it away where I wouldn't have to look at it or admire it, so I understood where he was coming from. Was my reasoning for him not wanting a Progressive correct though?

"I had always imagined that the Progressives were my greatest creation," he smiled nostalgically and it felt like being at the dinner table with him all over again. _Dad, what are you doing?_ "Well, I was wrong. So. Horribly. Wrong. And to all my friends, coworkers… and family, I am sorry for deceiving you."

I felt as if I had to physically restrain myself from inching closer and closer to the television, even as I felt the eyes of the Blakes shift to me every now and then. _You lied?_ Aurora, the mother that she was, rested a comforting hand on my shoulder as Octavia scooted closer to me, ready to offer comfort if need be.

"After the initial prototypes my team created, Chancellor Charles Pike came to us with a coding proposition, claiming that it would allow for Arkadia to be protected against Grounder communities that wished to attack us. Naturally, I agreed – I would do anything to keep Arkadia on the ground and out of harm's way," he said as his eyes shown with the utmost sincerity. My heart began to beat faster and faster. "It wasn't until I received word that our officers had been leading offensive actions against surrounding Grounder communities using the Progressives. They became a weapon to enslave and to kill," he paused and had to look away from the camera. "Recent intel has told me that… that… the Progressives will be engaging against our own community. Those of lower class living as well as those of prisoner status will be persecuted. Soon."

By this point, Octavia was cowering more towards Bellamy for moral support, of which he offered as best as he could, even though I could see the fear beginning to etch into his charcoal eyes. I could not see Aurora's features, but the slight tightening of her grip on my shoulder signaled that she was trying to keep it all together. I, on the other hand, let my physical features give nothing away, but I could still feel and possibly hear the pounding in my heart, as my mouth went completely dry, and a loud ringing in my ears began.

"I am so truly sorry to ALL Arkadians," Jake Griffin, the deceiver, spoke. "But heed my words carefully: Do not let the actions of Chancellor Pike obscure your morality – your choices. You are not his subjects to be taunted at his own will. You are Arkadians. You are Skaikru."

With that, the channel shut off in a blur of static. It looked as if he wanted to say more, but was cut off quickly.

For only a few moments, the Blakes and I sat in stunned silence. _What did this mean for me? Hell, what did this mean for them?_

My mind still ablaze, I looked over to Bellamy who mimicked my own facial features. The chapped nature of his lips allowed me to know his mouth was completely dry too.

Mustering all my strength, I stood on my own two feet. "Ms. Blake, I think it's time I go home now," I stated as normally as I would any other day. Except this time, I could almost feel bile rising from my throat.

She looked as if she were going to protest before I started quickly putting on my jacket and boots, giving her no time to protest.

"Clarke," Octavia said from behind me. I didn't want to look at her knowing what my family had potentially done to hers. "Clarke, look at me please," she plead and grabbed my hand in her own.

Reluctantly, I did look at her. "O, I might not be around for a while," I stated calmly. The blonde waves I usually tried to keep pushed behind my head slowly began to unravel in my face.

Any other day, she would argue and call my bull shit. After all, it was a rarity that I was never not in the Blake household for more than two days; Octavia usually occupied the other days at my house. But today was different, and she didn't argue. However, all I wanted to hear from her in the moment was 'see you tomorrow, dummy' and have her give me a hug.

Over her shoulder, I looked to Bellamy and only nodded. He reciprocated. It was always a strange connection that we had – all that fighting and getting under each other's skin must've really built a mental connection between us. He stepped up to Octavia and tentatively put his arm around the lithe girl as she slightly tucked herself into his embrace once more. It wasn't every day Bellamy Blake would openly be affectionate towards his sister.

With no more words to say, I walked out the front door and allowed the frisk air to hit my cheeks. My hands felt numb with fright and every step I took felt like I was splitting my shins in half, but I just kept walking. And walking.

"Clarke, hey! Wait," Bellamy's voice sounded from behind me. In the fog of it all, his voice stood out like a beacon of hope, oddly enough. He caught up to me and I merely looked at him, briefly letting my guard down and showing him the true fear I held in my eyes. His, however, were strong and capable. He was ready to be fearless for the both of us. "If you can't come back to give us a proper goodbye…" he paused. "Then I wanted to say it so myself. May we meet again Clarke Griffin, and we will."

Seemingly without much thought, Bellamy lurched forward and gave me a sloppy hug. His arms covered my own, so I could barely lift my own past his elbows; but, for a moment, I laid my head on his chest and breathed in his scent – his musky scent that was just so… Bellamy. "May we meet again Bellamy Blake," I stated softly and gave him a slight kiss on the cheek. all the while, he remained still and didn't further acknowledge the peck of my lips. I had never done that to him before and almost missed the spark that passed through me when I touched my lips to his warm cheek.

"Besides, I'll want this back," he stated while slipping something cold and heavy into my hand. I looked at the object and saw that it was a swiss army knife with the engraving B.B. on the side. "Don't lose it," he said at last, grabbing my hand and enclosing it over the metal instrument.

"I wouldn't dare," I said.

At last, after Bellamy was safely walking out of sight, I pocketed the useful weapon and sprinted home. No one was outside – probably because everyone was reeling from Jake Griffin's admission.

I approached home in record time, and was thankful that our home was nearer to the outside of the gates. That way, it would take officers – and apparently Progressives – longer to get here. Even so, I could just make out faint figures coming my way in the distance.

I ran into the house, not really having a clue as to what to do. _Did I grab some food and run? Did I hide in under floor boards? Did I just wait patiently for whomever to interrogate me and take me away to God-knows-where?_

"Clarke, honey?" My mom's gravelly voice yelled from the kitchen as she rushed to greet me. We engulfed one another in a hug, and that was all it took for me to know that she saw the broadcast.

"Mom…" I began to tear up. "Where's dad?"

"I… I don't know, sweetie," she said sorrowfully as her face broke. _How was she supposed to know anyway? Really, it was a dumb question on my part._ She leads us into the kitchen and on the table simply sat one hiking bag. It was filled and packed to the fullest, but the bag was small enough that even a child could carry it for several hours. "You have to get out of here."

"Wh-what?!" I asked. "But, what about you? Isn't this treason?" I asked. Something told me that I already knew the answer to both questions.

She ignored said questions, but carried on. "You have enough food for a week in there if you ration it right. I also packed you a… gun," she swallowed hard at that. My mother was a strong advocator against guns considering it was the second most common injury in her hospital. "There's a small blanket in there along with warmer clothes and a health kit. There's other stuff, too. But we need to get you out of here right now."

She continued to spew advice in the short time we had left, mostly about remembering how to hunt and scavenge. If I were to stumble upon any Grounder villages, I was to remember my manners and show gratitude to them. She told me that if I was going to remain near Arkadia, that I needed to keep a five-mile radius between myself and the perimeter.

"Mom," I interrupted her. "It's okay. I'll be okay," I stated calmly. Maybe it was the shock of the whole situation or maybe it was instinct, but I felt awfully calm in this moment as I grabbed several weapons from my room. My throwing knives for one – which the great Abby Griffin looked baffled about – as well as my trusty bow and quiver of arrows. I slung both across my shoulder, and clipped the throwing knives to a thigh holster specifically for them.

"Please tell me your father did not get those for you," she said in a half serious tone.

I didn't answer, but instead cracked the slightest of smiles, of which she returned. So, what if the knives had been a secret birthday gift and the matching holster a secret Christmas gift?

"Clarke, you need to go somewhere specific," my mom stated, handing me a map of Arkadia and the surrounding terrain and other villages. "Remember that young lady I treated years ago with the leg brace? Her name is Raven and she runs an inn by the ocean," she stopped and physically pointed to the marked area on the map. "She runs trading posts as well as safe passage for all the surrounding Grounder villages. And as weird as it sounds, there is someone else you need to meet. It is very important that you do so, do you understand?" she waited for me to answer, so I nodded my head, acknowledging that I understood everything she had mentioned. "Clarke, you need to convince the Grounders or anyone to help us – to help Skaikru. Without them, we won't stand a chance."

"I know, mom," I said heavy-hearted, knowing that this was mostly likely the last time I would see her for quite some time. "I love you, mom."

"I love you too, Clarke and so does your father," she said with tears in her eyes.

We embraced one last time before I snuck out the back door. I began walking at a brisk pace, but sped up when I heard my mother yelling at the guards with them yelling right back. I started running. Not because I had to – although I probably should've been from the beginning – but because I could not stand to hear my mother fighting this battle alone.

And into the woods I trekked.

 **Thoughts? Good, bad, just happy that this story is finally being picked back up? Let me know!**


	6. And Out of the Woods

**Author's Note: Hello everyone, I am back with chapter 6 or chapter 5.5, depending on how you want to view it. We're picking up with the present tense, about a week or two after Clarke's injury was treated. We'll get to see how some of our lovely group of delinquents felt about the incident. Also, we get to see the first glance at Raven's Inn here. Just a few more chapters until part one is officially done. Next chapter we get to see the fearful Chancellor Charles Pike work his way to his reputation.**

 **As always, let me know what you think of the chapter! Constructive criticism is always welcome as wells as follows and favorites. Enjoy the chapter! :)**

 _Chapter 6: And Out of the Woods_

 _Clarke POV (Present Day):_

Each passing day, I could feel myself getting stronger, so much so that I could once again walk by myself. Really, it was all thanks to Jasper and Bellamy – one kept me from getting an infection and one staved off a potentially deadly fever, and then continued to wait on me hand and foot. Although out loud, I would only ever admit to recovering so quickly due to my natural self.

I was antsy, truly so. We had been sitting on this mountain for a week or so now, and we needed to move before the Progressives zeroed in on us. If Pike kept sending Progressives out further and further, they would be on us any day now.

"Hey Princess, how's your side today?" The nickname made my heart do a backflip, but the voice that came with it sounded strange, as if that person shouldn't be uttering that name.

"Jasper, don't call me that," I scolded him.

"Oh, right!" he said while snapping his finger. "Only Bellamy's allowed to call you that."

To some extent, Jasper was right. Not even my father called me Princess when I was younger. I think he tried to once, but I looked at him like he was crazy and he said he would never do it again. When Bellamy first called me Princess, I gave him that same incredulous look, but he took my standoffish attitude as a challenge. And here we are today, with him still calling me Princess and me letting it happen. After a while, I learned to deal with it. And after even longer, I even learned to like it.

I let it go for now though. That was the least of our problems. "We have to go soon, you know that, right?" I asked. "Any day now, the Progressives could be here. We know that Pike is sending them further and further out. And-"

Jasper interrupted me. "I was actually coming by to tell you that we can go. You seem capable enough to walk and strain yourself some again. We'll just have to take it easy. Go at a slower pace. We can start packing up and when Bellamy and Monty get back from scouting, we can make plans to get a move on." His goofy grin relieved me; it was something that I hadn't seen much of the past couple days outside of him being around Octavia.

 _All this fuss because I couldn't manage to keep my damn self from getting hurt._

Throughout the past week, everyone seemed to fall into a routine of some sort. Jasper would check up on me occasionally, and then either read old medical books or organize his health kits, making sure that each one had an equal amount of supplies. My gun shot dwindled some of our bandaging stock, but there was still a copious amount of everything else. Ben would clean our weapons and cook the small camp dinner, whilst Octavia helped here and there. Octavia worked on her skills with her sword and knives when she wasn't with Jasper or Ben. She actively avoided me in either situation. Other than that, Bellamy often took Monty out for hunting and patrolling around the perimeter. I didn't see them too often, and by the longing look on Ben's face whenever they came back, I could tell that he didn't see much of them either.

Jasper quickly did his routine and made sure that my 'strenuous' labor wasn't effecting any of the stitches he put in. When he gave me the okay, I skulked back to my tent. It's not like I was used to being bossy to my group, but being hurt made me feel useless beyond belief, as if I couldn't lead whatsoever, or do anything for that matter. Even collecting fire wood was a stretch for me the past couple days.

I was almost to my tent when I saw Octavia briefly glimpse my way and avert her eyes even faster, letting her long dark hair mask her face. _What is up with her lately? Time to find out and end this... awkwardness._ Octavia and I had never been awkward with each other in our lives, so I knew whatever was going on with her was monumental.

I stalked over to her carefully as she was brandishing her knife. I remember the days she used to wear different hues of blues and purples from Arcadia's Exchange, but now she wore almost all black, with a mix of day grays in between. This would probably be one of those rare moments I would catch her by herself. "Hey O, can we talk for a moment?" I asked, while fidgeting with my hands nervously.

She didn't say anything and merely sighed solemnly. I signaled my head off to the side, letting her know that we should have some privacy away from the small camp.

She stood up and slung her sword across her back, ever the cautious one. We walked several paces outside of camp and I found a nice place to sit down. Octavia remained pacing back and forth, tense as ever. Everything would finally come out into the open today.

"Beautiful day out, huh?" I asked, trying to break the ice, brushing back a blonde streak of hair that fell into my face.

"What were you thinking?!" Octavia nearly screamed.

 _Alright, just gonna jump right in with that._ I had a feeling that whatever she was feeling was my fault, but it was now confirmed so.

Before I could even get a word out, she began her tirade again. "I asked YOU multiple times if YOU were okay!" she yelled, really emphasizing her words. "And YOU just lied and tried to pretend everything was fine. We could've helped you sooner Clarke! How could you?!" the fierce warrior began to hold back frustrated tears.

Octavia's eyes clouded with tears and my own blue ones began to do the same. "Octavia…" I sniffed. "I'm so sorry. I was gonna tell someone, I swear… but everything just got swept up and I thought I would be fine."

I felt like a hurt puppy, kicked to the ground, even though it was all my fault.

She began to breath heavily and she turned away from me. I couldn't see her wet eyes, but I could hear her sobs, no matter how quiet she thought she was being. I quickly stood up and made my way to her direction, tentatively putting my hands across her waist and giving her a hug from behind. I rested my head on her back and let a few tears slip out of my eyes; Octavia grabbed my hands that were rested around her middle and merely covered them, as we basked in each other's comfort.

"I'm so sorry, O" I said while I silently cried into her hair.

"I could've lost you Clarke – everyone could've lost you. Bell almost lost you," she said weakly.

"I know," I stated firmly. "I know." That last one hurt the most. _My best friends... my family almost lost me. I almost died. How could you be so dumb, Clarke?_

"Clarke, you can't control everything," Octavia unraveled herself from me. "When shit like this happens, you need to tell us. Life or death, we stick together and it needs to stay that way, okay?"

I looked at her red-rimmed eyes and shaking body, but I also considered the fierceness with which she carried herself and the conviction in her voice. _When did she grow up so much?_

Octavia might have been my best friend, but I had met Bellamy first. We had classes together in Arkadia and we were once partnered up together to rehearse an act from Shakespeare's _Julius Caesar_. He was more excited about it than I ever could've been, so he insisted we were the very best performers in the class. That, of course, meant practice, practice, practice. One time, we went to his house to rehearse and I met his younger sister and mother. Even though Octavia was quite a few years younger than me, we hit it off right then and there. I had to admit, she was rather mature for her age, and I found myself able to have lovely discussions with her. That day, Bellamy and I didn't get any rehearsal done whatsoever as Octavia and I clicked immediately.

"On a brighter note, Jasper and Bell finally talked," she said to me with a slight smile and a huff of laughter.

And with that, I knew things would go back to normal. _Finally._

"Are we sure that's really a good thing though?" I asked skeptically, playfulness returning to my voice, even though my cheeks were still heated by past tears.

"Well they seem civil enough around each other," Octavia shrugged. We started making our way back to the camp, walking side by side. Both of us wiped our tear-stained cheeks as we talked. "Besides, Bell has been so preoccupied with you that he barely has any time to worry about what I was doing… or who," she smirked.

I barked out a laugh and scolded, "Octavia! Shhh, the others might hear you! You really want Ben to hear about your sex life?"

"Oh please, Clarke," Octavia side glanced me with a smirk. "I'm not puttin' out for him... yet. Besides, you'll know about it probably five minutes after it happens."

"Gross," I said. I had only had one boyfriend before all this began and we never made it passed third base before breaking things off. He wanted more when I didn't, and he found someone else who could give him that. I told Octavia about it a couple weeks after the first time just briefly, but I preferred to not go into the gory details - something she was rather upset about.

"You're welcome," she said smiling bright. _I didn't say thank you, you weirdo._

"You're gonna be a sex maniac, aren't you?" I asked fearfully, my body shaking out of faux fright.

"Oh, you better believe it m'dear!" she said while laughing evilly. "And you're gonna hear ALL about it."

With that, we were finally back at camp, and Bellamy and Monty made their appearance shortly thereafter.

I hadn't noticed it before, but Monty looked tired. Not like he was ready to go to bed after a long day's hard work, but he looked like he hadn't slept in days.

He looked to me and I could see his eyes gloss over slightly in a regretful matter before he gave me a slight smile that didn't reach his eyes whatsoever.

"Ben's worried about him… Monty won't talk about what happened," Octavia said from beside me as she zipped up her backpack, all her essentials packed away.

I merely nodded. _If I had just told Monty what was happening from the beginning… all this grief could've been avoided._

I felt sick to my stomach about what I had done to this group, all because I couldn't just suck up my pride and ask for help. Clarke, you really gotta work on that.

Bellamy, stoic as ever, came over to Octavia and I, and glanced between the two of us quizzically. I gave him a slight nod to his silent question and his face broke out with relief.

"What's the plan?" he asked with a smirk that lit up all his features.

He knew I was back and ready for business. I smiled at him in return.

"Same plan: go to Raven's Inn. My mom said it would be safe there and that we could form some connections," I said strategically as more camp members gathered around me.

"Connections how?" Ben asked skeptically. This might've been my journey, but he somehow took responsibility for our general well-being. He wasn't just Monty's dad, he became everyone's dad.

"If I'm being honest, I don't know," I replied truthfully, looking at him uncomfortably. I didn't need to prove my leadership skills to him, but I also didn't want to face the disappointed look he would surely give at my willingness to talk to strangers.

His eyes scrunched up slightly and his hand rested upon his chin in a thoughtful manner, lightly stroking the dark stubble that lined his skin.

"So they could be Grounders?" asked Octavia in a worried tone.

"Or Arkadians," pointed out Jasper as he looked to her.

Grounders hated us because we were Arkadians; Arkadians - except for a select few - hated us because we were outlaws. All and all, we didn't have very many allies to rely on.

Everyone exchanged worried glances. Truth be told, I didn't know what I was leading these people to. What Grounder would trust us after what we did to them? What Arkadian wouldn't turn us in – namely me – after the report of treason?

 _What's the verdict, Clarke? This is your journey after all._

"Look, I don't know what the future looks like or what it has in store for us, but the Inn is our BEST option right now. If you don't wanna go, you don't have to; but I gotta do this for my parents and for Arkadia," I said vehemently, looking at my rag-tag group of survivors.

Bellamy and Octavia shared a pained look to each other when I mentioned parents, given what happened to their mother.

Ben and Monty looked to be sharing a moment with each other, having a silent conversation with their eyes. While I loved my own parents to the moon and back, sometimes I felt as if I couldn't even connect with them in a verbal sense much less to have a mental conversation like these two were having.

Jasper was surprisingly the only one who looked me dead on without hesitation. My own eyes challenged him though. _Won't you hesitate?_

His dark and boyish features softened ever so slightly. "Dr. Griffin was like a mom to me," he began. I stiffened slightly. More than once did I have to listen to my mom talk about Jasper-this, Jasper-that. After I decided to not commit my career to medicine, she coincidentally found herself a new apprentice to fawn over. Sometimes, I just wish she could be as proud of me and my art pieces as much as she was proud of Jasper's sutures or how calm he was in the O.R.. "Plus, I'm already a delinquent – what've I got to lose?" he added with a devious smirk.

I smirked right back at him, dropping my previous scowl of jealousy. _I can make you proud, too, Mom._

"Well I can't just let my boyfriend and my best friend walk into unknowing danger alone," Octavia said while walking up to Jasper and taking his hand.

I smiled at the small bit of affection between the two of them as they shared a contented look.

"We're in," piped up Ben, giving a small nod of approval at my leadership. A bit of joy fluttered in my stomach at his approval, although I would never admit that out loud.

Part of me already knew Bellamy's answer, but I still needed to hear it. "Where Octavia goes, I go," Bellamy smiled lovingly to his sister. "And I don't mind the view when I follow you, Princess," he said with a wink.

"Yuck, save the pillow talk, Bell," Octavia rolled her eyes.

I gave Octavia a speculative look, because it wasn't like we were just talking about her own potential sex life not even thirty minutes ago. _Yuck, indeed._ Her dark eyebrows rose mischievously and her mouth lifted with the hint of a snicker.

 _Did he really just say that? In front of everyone? He just had to say shit like that out loud._ One part of me was horribly embarrassed that he had actually said that, but another part of me was awfully flattered that I gave him something to look at. _It was just a joke, don't overthink it. You know Bellamy: he can charm the pants off anyone... Don't let it get to you, Clarke._

"Great," I breathed out after spending what felt like too much time dwelling on his comment. "Get packed up, we'll leave soon," I said with finality.

Octavia, Jasper and I were already ready to go with our three packs in one pile off to the side so we just had to wait a few minutes for the others to gather their own meager belongings. The main things to be packed were the few tents, sleeping bags, and toiletries we had acquired over the past several weeks. Our food stock was slowly dwindling, but we had enough to keep everyone healthy until we got the the Inn, assuming we didn't hit anymore snags in our journey.

"Clarke, you wanna help me out over here?" Bellamy gravelly voice asked while he held up his pack.

To repeat Jasper's words, _what've I got to lose? Patience? Nah, that was gone long ago with this guy._

I merely walked over to Bellamy and helped him stuff his sleeping bag back into its bag, not letting my face give away any indication that I was thinking of him.

The quietness that surrounded us gave me time to bask in Bellamy's physique. Sure, he could be a dumbass sometimes - well, most of the time if anyone asked me - but there was something in the way he moved. It was as if his broad shoulders held the weight of the world – it was tragically beautiful. His eyes big brown eyes really were the windows to his soul and he wore it proudly, but his too-often clenched teeth hardened his past boyish features. _He had to grow up so fast... Not just for Octavia, but for his mom... maybe even me._

"How's Monty been?" I broke the silence, attempting to abandon the misleading and delusional thoughts in my head.

"He's been better. Kinda goin' back to what he was like when he lost his mom," Bellamy stated seriously. Out of all us, Bellamy had spent the most time with Monty since being on this mountain. "You should talk to him."

"Hmmm," I hummed. _I am not looking forward to that conversation._

"You okay, Princess?" he asked out of nowhere.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" I asked back. _Are you okay, Clarke?_

"Your face betrays you yet again. Haven't you figured out that I can read you like an open book by now?" he claimed as we finished stuffing the overused sleeping bag into the backpack. Bellamy sat back on his heels and looked to me expectantly.

He was right. I could feel the lines of stress forming on my forehead from this conversation alone as well as the weight of everyone's well-being on my shoulders, weighing me down into the ground. I had many reasons to not be okay. "Just worried about what's going to happen. I don't want to lead you all into some type of danger," I stated without looking him in the eye. Because really, that's exactly what I was doing. "Are you okay?" I retaliated.

"Just worried about you," Bellamy looked at me as if I should already know that.

"Don't be," I stated firmly but still knew he would worry. We were both silent for several moments. I stared into his chocolate eyes while he gazed to my blue ones. The moment felt like one of those Western standoffs that my parents used to watch with some of the other council members on special nights. "Some days… I just want to walk away from all of this. Go somewhere else. Be someone else."

My bittersweet revelation made Bellamy turn his head away. "You would leave your parents? Octavia?" he looked at me with sad eyes that allowed me to view his soul yet again. "Me?"

"That's not what I meant, Bell," I said seriously. _Wasn't it?_ "All I'm saying is that the pressure's on. I don't know if I can do this."

"It's not just you Clarke. We're with you. I'm with you 'til the end," Bellamy said while holding my gaze. "Besides, we both care too much to leave."

 _He was right… no matter how much I would ever want to walk away from all this, I wouldn't. He wouldn't._

There was some solace in knowing that Bellamy - my rock - wouldn't leave.

"Everyone else is ready to go, c'mon," he said while getting up and offering me a hand as I noticed some of the fleeting glances being sent our way.

Any other day, I would slap his hand away and pop up on my own, but today was different. I grabbed his hand as he helped me to my feet, careful to go slow so that I wouldn't strain my side too much. Contrary to what I let people believe, it still hurt like crazy, but that pain would have to wait. With one hand clasped around my own and his other cupping my elbow, I made it to my two feet with little damage. Truth be told, I didn't need help to get up, but the reassurance that he was there was enough to make me take his warm hand.

Bellamy gave me a knowing look, but didn't say anything. "Thank you," I said gratefully.

"As her majesty wishes," he mock-bowed to me. He leaned into my personal space – something I was starting to get used to – and whispered, "You lead, I'll gladly follow."

As he winked, I attempted to stave off the offending flush upon my cheeks as I thought about his earlier comment. _Ah, so it did mean something…_

When I finally regained myself, I acknowledged the packed-up camp. "Alright, let's go to the beach," I said with a daring smile.

 _(Several days later:)_

Well, we would've been here sooner had I been fully capable. But alas, we had to stop much more frequently so that I could rest. _"Go on without me, I'll catch up,"_ I would say, but no one seemed to be okay with that.

Now though, I could smell the salty, yet refreshing scent of the ocean. At least, that's what I assumed it would smell like. Some tracks of sand were getting more and more visible as we got closer to our destination. Sand in the middle of forest-y woods had to be a good sign that we were getting close. Luckily, Arkadia was near a fresh water lake, so we didn't have to go far for drinking and cleaning water. Other than that lake and several streams and rivers, I had never happened upon a large body of water yet.

Now, the ocean was so close, yet far enough away for me to take one of my famous thirty-minute breaks. To be fair, it wasn't even my decision.

"Bell, we're practically there, I can make it," I plead with the person of my nightmares, ignoring the slight cramp in my side

"No, Clarke," he said in his commanding voice. "You need to rest up before we get there. Save. Your. Strength," he said, practically standing over me now.

"Fine," I seethed back, challenging with his eyes. Sometimes, I lived for the days when Bellamy would take charge of our little camp so as to give me a much needed break, but I was regretting ever liking that side of him in this very moment.

Meanwhile, our travel mates pretended to not stare in our direction when we parted ways, him calmly walking away while I huffed in the opposite direction.

I couldn't possibly fathom how infuriating this man could possibly be. _In what right mind does he think he can give ME orders?_

I sat up against a nearby tree and tried to cool myself down. Instead of stewing in my anger, I attempted to feel the cooling ocean breeze.

 _So close._

"Hey, you should drink some water," the shy and low voice of Monty piped in. _Where did he come from? How the hell did this kid sneak up on me?_ Maybe I was a little more disoriented than I thought.

I gladly took the water bottle from his outstretched hand. "Thanks," I said awkwardly.

After the past couple of days, I was just hoping that things between everyone would go back to normal. It was simply just the best we could do: find a goal, pick up, and move on.

But something was different about this incident – about my incident. Everyone else seemed to be putting my getting shot behind them, except for Monty. He seemed deeply disturbed these past couple days and I could tell that Ben hadn't been able to get to him. Nor Bellamy. Even Octavia, stubborn as a mule, forgave me and put my getting shot passed her.

He merely came over to hand me the water bottle, and he turned on his heel to go relax like everyone else. "Wait," I beckoned. "Why don't you hang out for a bit, we haven't talked in a while."

"Uhh, sure. Okay," Monty accepted my invitation reluctantly.

Both of us were silent for a moment and I took the opportunity to take a light drink of water. "So you and Bellamy have been hanging out? Thought you didn't like him all that much?" I asked. There was truth in my statement, especially considering Bellamy mistakenly tried to kill Monty's dad before he knew who they were.

"Nah, he's okay. He's just been teaching me stuff," he mentioned vaguely. "He's helping me with archery practice."

I nodded absentmindedly. Now it all made sense. It's not as if Monty and Bellamy hate each other per se, but they had never really gotten along and never really talked to each other. Now, they had some common ground since I wasn't capable of mentoring Monty.

Much like that day right before the Progressives showed up, we both sat against the strong tree. I left my legs extended – hoping that a certain freckled man would trip over my feet – while Monty kept his feet neatly tucked under him.

"I don't blame you," I said suddenly, but quietly enough so that no one would hear. "And you shouldn't blame yourself either."

He said nothing and my only indication that he heard me was his solemn sigh. "I almost got you killed," he said with a frightened expression on his face.

"No, you didn't," I said logically. I could see the answer plain as day, so why couldn't he? "In fact, if you didn't shoot the damn robot when you did, things could've been a lot worse," I stated matter-of-factly. "Monty, it is not your fault."

Without thinking it through, I held my pinkie out. "What are you doing, Clarke?" Monty asked, confusion clear as day in his voice.

"We never got to do our pinkie promise," I said with the cock of my head. "Monty, none of us are going anywhere, you gotta understand that." My mind drifted to the similar conversations I had had with Octavia and Bellamy alike only a mere few days ago.

I continued to hold my pinkie out for him to take, neglecting the oncoming hand cramp.

"Fine, if you insist," Monty said in a mildly bitter tone, but I could see the onset of a smile creep into his features. My job was done, and whether he chose to forgive himself was up to him.

Even so, Ben gave me an appraising look from across the way. _Thank you_ , he signaled with his head.

"Give the word, Princess," Bellamy said after a few minutes of blissful silence. Monty had left my side to pace our camp ground, while Ben calmly sat on a rock and looked on at his son with a worried glance. Octavia and Jasper remained out of the way and in their own little bubble – not talking, but just basking in each other's company. Bellamy looked at them as well and sighed.

"Don't worry so much about them," I stated while following his line of sight. Instead of staying transfixed on the new couple, I decided to glance at the older Blake sibling. He stood over me as I was still leaned up against the tree, so I admired the outline of his jaw and cheekbones. Most of his curls were matted down from the sweat of hiking, but a few unruly ones still poked out here and there.

"Stop gawking," he said playfully, not even looking at me.

My face flushed because he was, to some extent, correct. But, I would dare not let him know that. "Far from… just thinking you need a haircut is all," I said while standing up and ruffling his hair slightly, making some of the curls even more unruly.

"Keep tellin' yourself that," I could hear him just barely mumble as he watched me carefully saddle my pack, ready to help should I need it.

Everyone followed suit soon after.

Soon, we could not only smell the ocean air, but we could see the waves and the shore. The sun was almost blinding as it reflected off of the water and the sand's texture, yet a tall and wide building stood on the horizon. From our position, the place looked rustic, yet modern in some sense. Nobody walked in or out of the front door as we got closer, but dim lights shown through some of the windows, signaling that some people did stay here. No sign was needed to know that this was Raven's Inn.

"Conceal your weapons, but keep them close," Ben stated warily. "We don't know if we're among friends or enemies."

"So… this is like some type of trading post, right?" Jasper asked anyone in the group. However, all eyes turned to me.

"Something like that," I claimed as we quickly approached the wooden front doors. A lot of Arkadians probably had no idea this place existed, and it was even less likely that Chancellor Pike would openly address the place. Raven would rather live out in the woods with the Grounders - with the enemy - than be in the safe confines of Arkadia. Why would his power-hungry nature admit to someone not wanting to live by his totalitarian rules?

I yanked the nearest door open and walked inside. No noise could be heard. Not from me, not from the door, not from anywhere. Bellamy traveled in as well followed by the rest of the group and we deftly strolled to the front desk.

Still, no one came.

And after ten more seconds, not even footsteps could be heard to signal that someone was here as Bellamy halfheartedly tried to push his way to the front of the group to shield us all.

"There's a bell," Jasper stated nonchalantly and pursed his lips.

After rolling my eyes, I read the small sign that said, 'Ring for Service' in too fancy cursive writing. So, I did just that.

 _Cling._

Just one ring that seemed to echo for several stories of the beautiful gothic-type building.

Just then, footsteps could finally be heard. More like a thud, creak, thud, creak.

A tanned tall woman with dark hair and wild, but calming eyes came through the back door. She wore a red tank top and green cargo jeans. Except one of the pant legs was covered almost entirely by a metal and plastic brace from the knee down.

"Welcome in everyone, my name is Raven. How may I help you today?" she smiled, but I could tell the smile was very straining, as if she had to repeat this mantra everyday.

Everyone in the group exchanged gleeful glances. Phase one was almost done and over with.

"Hi… Raven. My name is Clarke Griffin, you knew my mom…?" I questioned to make sure we were talking with the correct Raven. One could never be too sure in this world.

"Abby's kiddo," her smile turned more genuine this time around – sympathetic almost. "Here you're in a bit of trouble…" she stated ominously.

So she knew. _Would she turn me in to Pike? Let us go free and tell us never to come back again?_

"Looks like I gotta couple rooms open," she said with the same smile that made my lips twitch just barely. "I hope you'll be pleased with your stay."

 **How did you all like the chapter? We're soon wrapping up Part one of this series. What are you hoping to see in these last few chapters? What do you want to see in Part two? Let me know in a review. Don't forget to follow and favorite. Have a good day/night! :) My apologies for the chapter being so long (it was the original reason why I split up the previous chapter and this one.), but a lot did happen, so you can't complain that much, eh? :)**


	7. Ghost of Me

**Author's Note: Hello all, I've actually had this chapter and the next chapter written for a couple weeks, but I was just now able to get around to editing. This is going to be the first chapter seen through the eyes of Charles Pike. I apologize for the longevity of this chapter (almost 6500 words!), but it encompasses many years that have shaped Pike into the man he is today. Next chapter, we're going back to Clarke and co. at the Inn. It'll be some sweet moments, as well as some surprising moments. Stay tuned!**

 **As always, please feel free to leave a review/follow/favorite. I love the response that this story is getting and I hope to live up to your expectations from here on out. :) This chapter's song is "Ghost of Me" by Daughtry. Truly a wonderful song, and one of my favorites by the band.**

 _Chapter 7: Ghost of Me_

 _Charles' POV (Flashback):_

"Alright class, don't forget to send me your assignments. The due date is three days from now and this essay will account for forty-percent of your grade," I stated with finality to my class of sophomores. As I looked across the students, I could see mixed faces – some students looked rather smug and prepared, while others looked awfully worried.

A hand went up in the back amongst the sea of students, but I dared not take the question. "And no, Mr. Murphy, an essay on America's 'Planet of the Apes' series will not be accepted." I looked to him expectantly and he shamefully put his hand down. "Have a good day, class," I finally dismissed.

Teenagers had always baffled me; on the one hand, they were too lazy to do their damn homework half the time, but man did they move fast when they didn't want to be in class. I couldn't help but smile at myself as I recalled doing the same thing when I was younger. God only knows why I decided to become a teacher. My parents always irked me to become a politician, like Thelonious, but I opted for teaching. I felt like more of a use that way – full time teacher, part time councilman.

I locked up my classroom door and walked down the narrow hallway of the Ark, stopping by the window to look at the stars. Simultaneously, I could view the planet Earth as well as it's moon. My generation had never been to the ground before due to the radiation from almost one hundred years ago, but the Earth I saw now still resembled the Earth from old copies of geography books at the Ark library. For the life of me and due to Earth's constant rotation, I could never name the proper oceans and seas, or even the continents for that matter; but that hardly mattered to me. Any window in the Ark was always my second favorite view. Just knowing that someday, people of the Ark could walk free on Earth's surface…

"Daddy!" an excited toddler yelled at me and jumped at my legs, hugging them tightly.

I laughed whole-heartedly. "Hello sweetheart," I said to my daughter as I picked her up into my arms. I gave her a big kiss on her cheek and she giggled. Some people passing by smiled widely at the two of us. "How was your day today?" I asked while walking us towards our quarters.

"Really, REALLY good, Daddy!" she yelled into my ear.

While I loved this girl to the end of the universe and back, she had the lungs of the Ark's alarm system some days. Those days included, but were not limited to being excited and/or on the brink of a tantrum.

"Myranda, what've I told you?" I scorned her.

"Inside voices, I know. Sorry daddy," she said quieter this time.

"It's okay, sweetie. Tell me about your day," I said to her as we came to our quarters.

"Today in school, we learned about different animals! Miss Monroe even said that some places WAY long ago used to have a bunch of animals in one place called a zoo. How cool! I think my favorite is a… a… elephant?" she questioned while flapping her hands behind her ears.

"An elephant, sweetie," I corrected her in my so-called teacher voice.

She, however, carried on with only the roll of her eyes. "And then we painted some pictures, and Clarke invited me over to have dinner and play!"

"And what did you say to that?" I asked her. She was independent for her age, but she still needed to understand that she had to ask permission before doing some things.

"I said that I would ask my daddy!" she smiled brightly at me. God, she reminded me so much of her mother. Those bright eyes and big grin always brought back wholesome memories of my late wife, Christine. The only resemblance that Myranda even shared with me was my dark skin.

"Well, I guess if you two behave, then you may hang out," I relented. _How could I say no to those bright green eyes?_

The arrangement worked out well, I dropped off Myranda at the Griffin's quarters – it was a long two minutes of Clarke and I will do this, and Clarke and I will do that! Jake and Abby Griffin already assured me that they let Clarke's babysitter know that another guest would be joining them, to which the babysitter seemed fine with.

With Jake and Abby in tow, we walked down to the Council room to meet with the other members. Once every month, we designated time to a mandatory meeting. I would give up an hour of grading high school papers and math problems.

Abby would give up an hour of running the infirmary, and let Jackson tackle it all.

Jake would give up an hour in the lab, along with Jacapo Sinclair.

Likewise, Marcus would hand over his duties to one of his deputies for an hour.

And our dear Chancellor, Thelonious, would finally present his ideas for making the Ark a better place to live. Although, that in itself seemed to be a seemingly more difficult task this past year.

Today would be no different.

When everyone finally flooded into the room and Thelonious let the Griffins know that Wells joined Clarke and Myranda at their quarters, we were able to carry on with the meeting.

"Does anyone have any requests to kick off the meeting today?" Thelonious stated, opening the table for discussion.

"More teachers," I threw out. "There are too many kids per class, and most parents have to work, so they aren't able to home school. My class average is thirty-five to forty students… I just can't seem to connect with any of them."

Lots of the other Council members nodded their heads, thinking the same thing.

"Good point, Charles," Thelonious stated, resting his chin into his hand. His dark skin nearly matched my own, but his face was clear of any beards or mustaches. His eyes remained thoughtful. "But who will do it?"

"We could recruit some of the next graduating class?" piped up Jake.

The conversation fell from topic to topic as we neared the end of the meeting. Thelonious rose from his seat and spoke above the mumbles of everyone in the meeting room. The slight noise halted to a hush and Thelonious began speaking. "There is one more rather important matter that we must begin talking about. Jacapo and Jake here have informed me that the Ark will be able to land on Earth within the near future," he paused. Everyone looked shocked and looked between the two scientists. Even Abby did so as her beautiful brown doe-eyes filled with confusion towards her husband. Something tells me that she had no idea about this. "We were able to find a way to test the radiation floating in Earth's atmosphere, and it appears that it would not be toxic to people of the Ark because of the radiation that we have been exposed to in space."

It made perfect sense. The logic was there and everything. I trusted Jake and Sinclair's words like none other.

"Pike," Thelonious said to me, getting down to business. "I want you to start teaching survival classes here soon. I have some books from the library to give you that will hopefully cover everything we need people to know."

I was baffled. He wanted me to teach classes on Earth survival skills? "Are you sure, Chancellor?"

"Yes, Charles," he said to me. "You are one of my longest friends and I would trust that you get this job done any time of the day."

And so I began my own studying to surviving the earth below us. Myranda would finally see the ground, and not just from an old worn-out copy of a textbook.

Maybe, just maybe, she would get to see that elephant after all.

 _(Flashforward:)_

One year after I had finished teaching hundreds and hundreds of survival classes to the young and to the old, we had finally landed on Earth. Some residents on the Ark had been wary about traveling to Earth, but the consensus was that people were happy – genuinely happy. After so many years, we were finally going home. _Home._ On top of teaching survival classes, I had taken a couple books on architecture and began drafting ideas for a house for Myranda and I. Instead of the stuffy quarters we were currently situated in, we could live somewhere... open. Free.

Upon landing safely, we didn't have to worry about much. Our technicians were able to land the Ark safely around a forest-y area, near enough to a river. Sinclair said something about our coordinates being within the Eastern United States of America, at least what was left of it. Until we could make plans to do further development, people would still be permitted to live in their quarters, but the thought of being able to walk outside without being sucked into the vacuum of space was a welcomed adventure.

I remember seeing Hannah Green's kids running the complete opposite direction of the Ark, his father laughing right beside him. Likewise, a lot of the other children did the same. Hell, Myranda even convinced Clarke and Wells to trek off and explore the grassy terrain.

On the other hand, the adults preferred to stay near the ship and relax. Everyone was glad to be off the ship, but were glad for the shelter.

I merrily stepped out of the shadows and breathed in the brisk and slight humid air. Did the air taste different or was that just me? I could feel the sun beat against my skin. I was so used to the cool stale air ventilated through the Ark that I almost immediately began beading with sweat. But it felt great. Everything felt great. No one ever sweat on the Ark.

"Isn't it a sight to see?" Thelonious asked me. I could see him out of my periphery, but dared not take my eyes from the endless green and blue that lay in front of my eyes.

"It's... magnificent," I stated with a sense of awe. "And somber."

"What an odd choice of words," the aging chancellor stated to me.

While the terrain was breathtaking, I could help imagining the original people of Earth, the one's who didn't make it on to the Ark. Whose houses were ripped up by the hurricane-like turmoil of the Earth's ending? Whose cars were buried under the rubble? Whose skin and bones were used to replenish the Earth's botany?

The Chancellor's hand came down to rest on my shoulder for a brief moment. This time, I turned to him. My eyes felt heavy, as I tried to keep them from being deceiving. "We are home, Charles."

"We... are home," I repeated.

"Dad!" Myranda yelled at me. "Dad, it's so amazing… and green!"

The Chancellor saw this as his chance to part with me to check the other occupants of the Ark.

I hugged my daughter close to me and said nothing. She was going to turn ten here soon and it felt like she was growing up too fast for her own good. "It's wonderful, isn't it?" I asked.

"You think mom would've liked it here?" Myranda asked me. Christine had died in childbirth and Dr. Griffin had assured me that nothing could be done to save her - said she overexerted herself. Myranda never felt too sad whenever I brought up her mother; at least, she didn't feel the sadness I felt. Even in the lost areas of the storage, no camera could be located, so I never had any photographs of Christine to show, but my vivid descriptions allowed Myranda to know that she had a very beautiful mother. I think she was just bothered by the fact she didn't have a mom, like most other kids in all her classes. However, it was part of the reason why her and Wells got along, and why he brought her into his friend group.

"I think your mother would've loved it here," I said into my daughter's hair. When Christine was pregnant, she would often fantasize and wish about raising our child on Earth. "This is all she ever wanted for you."

 _You got your wish, my love. My Christine._

It only took a few days for shit to hit the fan, though.

One day while letting the kids play out in the woods, some of the guards working on a perimeter heard them. I heard them. I was helping the guards out with making the perimeter, just so I would be close if Myranda needed me. She said her and the other kids wouldn't go too far into the woods. From the sound of their screams, I could tell they hadn't.

Somehow, that worried me even more. _Could it be an animal?_ None of us had gone out in any hunting parties yet, so we didn't know the full extent of the wild life, if there was any beyond the vast greenness of the forest.

Almost all thoughts escaped me as I ran to the screams. It didn't sound like my Myranda, but all the kids were supposed to stay together. I just knew my daughter was in trouble.

"Myranda!" I yelled at the top of my lungs. There were guards behind me and one of them was contacting more people over the mandatory walkie that comes with their uniform. "Get more guards over here, STAT!" I said while taking the guard's gun out of his holster. The gun was quite familiar to me. There was a time before becoming a teacher that I had wanted to be a guardsman. I had gone through all the training, but when graduation date came, it became something that I didn't want to do. My job would've been to rummage through other people's homes looking for contraband and anything suspicious, and a part of me just couldn't do that to someone else's private home.

"Dad!" I heard my daughter sob. She was close by. I held the gun more firmly within my hands - not flinching, not shaking.

Soon enough, I was upon her. I had seen some of the kids running back to camp but knew that not all of them had done so. Namely, Myranda. And Clarke, as well.

 _Please don't be hurt, please don't be hurt…_

I skidded to a halt in the mossy dirt of the forest upon seeing my daughter. Clarke was with her also, trying to shield Myranda behind her. I tried to check over the two girls for injury, but it was a difficult task, considering neither of them were facing my direction; they were looking directly at a figure. Not just a figure… a human! But, this man was not from the Ark.

My eyes went wide with horror as I looked at the daggers laid out in both of his hands. He raised the daggers to their full extent when I raised my own gun at him and clicked off the safety, effectively stealing his attention, as well as the two children on the ground. "Who are you?" I asked. "Answer me!"

The man was tanned, but it was hard to tell as his face and any exposed skin was more or less covered in tattoos. The rest of him was covered in what looked like fur pelts. From his right side, I could see what looked to be a sheathed sword. This man seemed to be a warrior… or a hunter of some sort.

What stole my attention the most was his long and scraggly hair and its various intricate braids. Surely, he couldn't have done that himself. There had to be more. But where?

He made no move to put down his daggers, and yelled something at me, although I could not tell what he was saying. _Was he speaking a different language?_ Both of us made no move to do anything but stare each other down. Everyone on the Ark spoke English, so there was no classes taught for the ancient languages of Spanish, French, and so on.

Suddenly, his foot moved forward, whether it was towards the girls or myself, I didn't know. Without giving any second thought, I could feel my finger tighten around the trigger.

"NO!" I screamed as my finger pressed down hard onto the trigger.

Finally, the man dropped his daggers. He, himself, followed them shortly after. He mumbled the words, "Ai gonplei nou ste odon." Still, I did not understand.

I consoled the girls and swiftly took them back to camp. Myranda stayed in my arms the whole time, while I had Clarke walk in front of me, as I tried to keep a protective hand over her shoulder. The kids were such a tight group of friends that I often took on a fatherly role for Clarke whenever she was with Myranda.

"What even happened?" I asked to neither of them in particular.

I could only see the back of Clarke's bright blonde hair. She was looking at the ground, with her arms crossed around her waist. Myranda rested her head on my shoulder.

"He just came out of nowhere…" Clarke mumbled.

The Council had been holding emergency meetings what seemed like every other day now. After my killing the man – what we are now calling 'Grounders' – their leader, whoever he was had sent more of them our way.

Between the past month, there had been much bloodshed on both of our sides. Our front line, our guards were coming and going more and more. Whenever any of them even saw a figure move in the woods, they became trigger-happy. Kane looked more and more rugged and tired every time he walked into the Council room.

Not even the kids wanted to be outside anymore.

On the bright side, we had kicked it into high gear and built a fence big enough to surround the Ark. That barely staved off everyone's fear.

"I'm telling you, Jaha," I began vehemently. "We need to get rid of them by any means necessary!" Our people wouldn't feel safe if the threat of other people trying to kill us continued to loom over our heads. What kind of a home is that?

"You mean kill them?" Abby asked with disgust in her voice. Her cheeks were beginning to hollow out and her eyes began to sink in from the long hours spent with people in the infirmary. "Charles, they are people, too!"

"They may be people, but they tried to kill OUR kids! Or do you not remember that?" I asked, taunting her, making her remember the danger that her child was also in.

She stood abruptly from her chair. "Do NOT mistake my morality for ignorance, Pike!" she yelled. As she leaned over the table, I had to physically restrain myself from looking to her cleavage. Yes, Abby was a sight for sore eyes, but her features still offered radiance and lustful reactions. Besides, Jake wouldn't take too kindly to me looking down his wife's shirt.

Jake quickly grabbed her hand to calm her down, rubbing reassuring circles into hand. She sat back down and said a quick mild-mannered apology to those around her.

For some reason, seeing Jake and Abby's joined hands bothered me. But, why?

"They need to go," I seethed.

"We need to make peace," Kane spoke up. "Go to them without 'guns a blazin' and talk it out. We can live together in peace, but we have to work for it."

A lot of people nodded at his suggestion. Even the Chancellor. Meanwhile, Marcus sent me a sorrowful look.

"Chancellor," I began, turning towards him completely. "We cannot trust that making peace with these monsters will actually work. Are you really willing to put your life on the line for that? Your child's life?"

"Our guards are dying because we can't figure out a solution to this territory situation. Soon enough, it will be us. It will be our families that are dying if we do not put an end to this," said Thelonious.

I lightly smiled that the Chancellor took my side in this mess.

"However," the Chancellor once again began. "Killing them would not solve the issue either. They may have resources, technology, knowledge that can help us to survive."

We had been having this same conversation for weeks now, and it always ended the same way. Everyone would give their two-cents and leave, looking at me with a side-eyed glance. I would stay behind with Jaha to convince him that my ideas were the most promising and full proof.

One day, he stopped listening. Thelonious Jaha looked me directly in the eye. "Charles… this has to stop," he said after everyone else left the council room. By this point, the other council members looked to me with worry and hints of fear behind their stoic eyes. They were scared. But not of the Grounders. They were scared of... me.

"What do you mean?" I had asked, my eyebrows furrowing in confusion. His statement was awfully vague.

"The rest of the Council took a vote," he stopped talking for a few seconds. "We will be moving forward with the peace negotiations and you will not be a part of them."

My eye widened. "You're kicking me off the Council?" I asked with disdain.

"You may remain in your role as a teacher, but you will be no longer permitted to participate on any political agendas regarding the Council," Jaha stated all too formally for someone who was a so-called long-time friend.

"But... why?" I asked lowly.

"Charles, everyone is scared of you," Thelonious looked at me as if I should already know the answer. "All this talk about… killing other people is scaring the other members. What kind of an example would we be setting for the people if we just kill what we don't understand?"

I left the Council room shortly after with a whole burned into my heart. I loved my daughter, I loved teaching, and I had loved politics and being a part of something that mattered to people.

That night, I tucked Myranda into bed, making sure to tuck her in extra tight. As Earth's autumn rolled around, the nights became increasingly colder and blankets were becoming more and more scarce.

I sighed when I looked at her, sitting at the edge of the bed. "You know I'm just trying to protect you, right?"

"Maybe they're just trying to protect their own, too," she said back to me in a forbidden whisper.

Funny, that's the type of thing Christine would say.

(Flashforward:)

Winter was here now and we were not even close to being prepared. Between being worried about keeping the fence up and running, and keeping the Grounders at bay, no one gave a passing thought to how cold it was due to be.

When snow started falling, almost everyone had become sick. The first couple people who were sick were able to receive immediate treatment and be cured within a week, ready to go back to work and daily living. Those who developed the sickness later were less fortunate. Supplies were running low, especially medicine and not everyone was able to receive a vaccine or antibiotics.

The two Dr. Griffins were working in over time – one was trying to dispense and ration flu medicine accordingly, while the other was trying to recreate it for future use. The only problem was that more flu medication was going out than coming in. Not everyone was going to get their share of medication.

Including Myranda.

Abby told me that Myranda would be fine if she stayed under observation and stayed warm. Her cold wasn't even that severe. And I believed her.

A week passed, and Myranda only seemed to get worse. "It has to get worse before it gets better. It'll peak and then it'll be over. Everything will work out, Charles," Abby had consoled me one day. She no longer seemed afraid or looked to me with contempt. With her words, some semblance of hope filled me. _Everything would work out… right?_

Another week passed, and Abby became less attentive to Myranda, even as Myranda seemed to get worse with each passing day. Apparently, Clarke had the same sickness.

"Doc, you gotta get my girl some medicine," I plead with Abby one night, tears nearly in my eyes.

"Charles… I wish I could, but I just gave the rest out yesterday… to-to Clarke," she said. "Myranda will pull through, she's a strong girl." But even as she said it, I had a hard time believing her words.

My shoulders sank at her words. Of course, Princess Griffin would get the medicine before all those before her needed it.

I became bitter towards the blonde ten-year-old and her mother for making such a rash decision.

Another week passed, and Myranda's flu had morphed into pneumonia. My baby girl could barely breath at this point, mostly wheezing out what air she could. She was paler than usual and could barely keep any food down – not even soup. My Myranda was so weak that she could barely even sit up in bed to take sips of water without choking. I could barely look at my daughter without wanting to cry.

My bright, beautiful daughter was sick. So sick, and there was nothing to be done about it.

By the time Winter was over and all the snow had melted to showcase sprouting Spring flowers, twenty-five people had been pronounced dead from contracting sickness over the cold months. Twenty-four of them were adults, one of them was a child.

My child.

I stopped teaching classes. I stopped going out. I locked Myranda's old bedroom door, something I didn't want to see any longer, but it was something I knew that I couldn't just get rid of.

People came by and brought strange-tasting casseroles from old family recipes, but most of them went bad.

And it wasn't until a run that some of our hunters found an old bunker with blankets, canned goods, candles, and everything in between. They even found a beat up and dirty stuffed elephant. _How... somber._

To try and cheer me up, Jaha had invited me back to the Council, I knew it was a pity offer, but I took the opportunity. It no longer felt right to teach children when I couldn't look any of them in the eye and ask, 'Why couldn't it have been you?' And I didn't want to stay inside my quarters all day, Myranda's door starring daggers into my head. Politics were the only thing that felt right at this time, even though I couldn't muster up an opinion to share during meetings.

From what I gathered, Jaha and Kane had been in contact with the Grounder leader, who called herself Princess Anya. Really, a Princess? Not even a King or some other type of monarch? Jaha had stupidly invited her and her own Council into our territory for a formal dinner.

This was ridiculous. Bringing the enemy into our gates? Jaha was practically inviting evil into the premise and the fool didn't even seem phased by it! This man and these people on the Council were testing their leadership to the fullest, not giving a rat's ass about the safety of the camp whatsoever.

 _Anyone could do better than him… I could do better than him._

At last, the peace negotiations were here. It was dusk outside when Princess Anya arrived with her personal guards, who acted as her council as well. The Princess looked very regal, yet ready for battle at any given moment. Her hair – much like the first Grounder I ever saw – was done up with intricate braids cascading down her back. She wore a face of no-nonsense, her eyes seeming soulless. Both of our councils regarded each other as respectfully as possible and sat down opposite each other.

The Griffins and Thelonious had prearranged for Clarke and Wells to join the negotiations, considering the both would most likely end up in the world of politics.

The little brats probably weren't even paying attention to a word that was being said tonight.

"Welcome to the Ark, Princess Anya kom Trikru," Jaha stated regally.

"And thank you, Thelonious Jaha kom Skaikru, for your generosity tonight," the Princess spoke in a gravelly voice, yet her English was perfect.

A waiter of our own came out with drinks for each table member to make a toast.

"Now, let's talk peace," Thelonious said while raising his glass. Everyone around the table, even the Grounders followed suit.

"Let us talk compromise," Anya agreed. She gave the briefest of smiles and everyone took a drink from their goblets.

As people began to lower their glasses, Thelonious and Wells had a look of discomfort on their faces and both dropped to the ground within seconds after that first sip.

I jumped from my seat and went to the older Jaha, checking his vital signs just like the books showed me how. His pulse was rapid, I could barely count how many beats per second it was beating. He looked to me with fear in his eyes and signaled for me to check on his son as he continued seizing. Wells looked much like his father in the moment, but white stuff was oozing out of his mouth. Abby was trying to perform chest compressions on the eleven-year-old as Clarke held his hand, crying into his forearm.

After fifty more compressions, Abby rose to her feet and looked me directly in the eye. Disbelief shown in her orbs. "He's dead."

Clarke wailed.

The Council members reeled back in fright.

And Princess Anya was hastily being whisked away from the scene altogether.

"Poison," I said with vehemence in my voice. "Poisoned!" I screamed, while following the Grounders out of the room. "You poisoned our leader!" it only made sense, after all.

By now, everyone had made it out to the main area of our camp. "You killed our Chancellor!" I screamed at the retreating Grounders as they hopped onto their horses and ran.

"We invited them into our home… the place where we sleep! And they killed two of our own – our leader and our future leader!" I yelled at the rallying citizens in the court yard. "We let this happen!" I said while grabbing a gun from our artillery shed.

Before I had any more to say, people were following in my footsteps, armed with guns and grenades. I was their leader now.

They trusted me.

They followed me.

And all I would lead them to was glory and victory.

(Present:)

The Griffin household was truly a sight to see. Jake and Abby had clearly spent a lot of time perfecting each and every corner of it, inside and out. For the most part, they found the time between work and family-time to create such a lovely home.

Most people had opted to move into their own personalized homes, me included after a long time of securing Arkadia's safety, but some remained in the Ark's quarters and were charged a small rent each month. It was mostly young couples who were still trying to get on their feet.

I entered the quiet Griffin household, swinging the door open and letting it hit the back wall. "Griffins!" I yelled in an almost sing-song voice.

Both Abby and Jake came from the living room, both wearing sweatpants and sweaters. It regularly got cold this time around the year, especially in the mornings and at night, so their attire didn't faze me. That, and the fact that they had been under house arrest for several weeks. I wouldn't have the need for jeans either.

I was dressed in my normal black attire, with my issued Ark jacket - none of those horrendous cloaks and pelts that the Grounders wore. I rested my hand on my gun as they seethed at my presence. "Alright, let's do this again," I said to the pathetic looking couple. A strong part of me was proud that I could accomplish the near-demise of the power couple.

My Progressives looked like they were starting to do a number on them as I saw the numerous bruises on Abby's face and the sleek cut that lay across Jake's forehead.

Maybe they would relent.

Not that I would openly admit it, but the fact that no one was giving away Clarke's position and whereabouts was starting to worry me. I could only assume that the other missing Arkadians – the Blake siblings, Abby's damned social justice apprentice, and the Greens – were with her. She was gaining strength in numbers.

That was my strategy to power.

"You know the drill," I said to the Griffins in a bored tone. "Sit down."

They did as I said.

"Where's Clarke?" I asked.

"We. Don't. Know," Jake said lowly.

"You see, I think you do," I said matter-of-factly. "No… correction. I think you know where she's going. All you gotta do is tell me that. We won't hurt her, we just don't want her starting up shit that doesn't need to be messed with."

Abby snorted from her position and I looked to her expectantly. All these years later, and she was stunning as ever. We had all aged, and it began to show with the fading of her dark chestnut hair into something lighter, getting closer to greying. Her eyes – those damned beautiful orbs – remained ever the same. Sharp, trained, pointed, just a surgeon's eyes should be. Yet, compassion was held behind them for her daughter. I saw it every single time.

"Got something to say, Mrs. Griffin?" I asked.

"Not to you, Pike," she spat at me.

"You know, the punishment for treason on the Ark was floating," I began while grabbing a glass of juice from the fridge. "Mind if I have some? Oh, of course you don't!" I laughed lightly and took a drink. "The punishment for treason here is a formal exile. Although, as Chancellor, I could always change that sentence to death and nobody would bat an eye," I stated and took another drink. _Maybe…_ "Anyway, I've gotta admit, I'm impressed with the both of you. Really, bravo! You have done so well to protect your daughter from me and her own punishment."

"Myranda and Christine wouldn't want this," Abby stated to me. I hadn't thought about either of them in so long…

"DON'T talk about them. You have no right!" I yelled directly in her face as I grasped my gun in my hand, trying to defend the memories of my late wife and child. She was part of the reason both the loves of my life had died anyway. It's not like Mrs. Griffin was stacking up any good karma, so why was she still alive?

Abby let a few tears slip outside of her eyes, of which I swiped away with my thumbs. "Don't cry…" I stated, while looking at her longingly. Jake looked uncomfortable at my contact with her, but he dared not move out of fear of both me and the willing robots in the other room.

After another moment, I moved away from her face and looked at both them. "I'm real tired of having to go back and forth, and back and forth with you people. It's not getting me any results. And what I'm about to do probably won't get me results either – big surprise there. Just know that I will never stop looking for Clarke. Her punishment? It is in my hands now, and since no one seems to be cooperating with me on this situation, I can't say her future is looking promising."

The concerned parents looked to each other and seemed to have a silent conversation. Christine and I could do the same thing when the time did not permit for spoken words. This silent conversation often happened with them, but when they looked back to me, their eyes revealed nothing and neither one of them said anything.

"So, that leaves me with the question, Mr. and Mrs. Griffin… who do we need more?" I silently clicked off the safety on my hand gun. "Who do we need more of? Doctors or engineers?"

Swiftly, I shot Jake Griffin in the head as I heard a startled scream come from Abby's throat.

I stood over both of them, Abby sitting on her chair and trying to keep her tears and sobs at bay, and Jake on the floor as his blood stained the wooden floors with his eyes wide open.

And even though these people used to be close family friends throughout the years, I couldn't bring myself to feel any sympathy for the weeping widow. "I'll be seeing you real soon, Mrs. Griffin."

With that, I walked out the door. I had no further leads about the latest thorn in my thumb, but I felt somehow better just knowing that I caused her emotional pain.

After shutting the door to the Griffin household, I heard the ragged scream of Abby as she sobbed and yelled for her dead husband. _Just wait 'til you see what I do with your daughter, Mrs. Griffin._

 **Thoughts? Let me know! Definitely derailing from our heroes, but very important. Let me know if you want more Pike POV chapters! Next chapter goes back to Clarke and her band of rebels**


	8. If You Only Knew

**Author's Note: Hey guys, I'm back again! Already had a good portion of this chapter figured out for a couple months ago, but had no idea how to end it. Well, I figured it out and I hope the ending leaves you guys wanting more. As always, please feel free to drop a review/follow/favorite or PM me if you have a question or comment you want to bring up to me. Enjoy!**

 _Chapter 8: If You Only Knew_

 _Clarke POV: (Present:)_

"We got a couple rooms open that share the same floor, surprisingly enough," Raven commented a few minutes later, rummaging through paperwork.

"How is that surprising?" asked Ben warily.

"Well," Raven said as she started grabbing a few keys. "This is the most comfortable and affordable rest area between a lot of Grounder villages and Polis. We get a lot of traders here. Some of them don't leave and prefer to make their sales here, which is fine. Gets us more business. They usually set up shop in our main courtyard."

"Oh," I said. I had totally forgotten about money. Considering we had been taking hand-outs from strangers for weeks upon weeks now. "How much will we owe you?" I asked.

Raven looked to me with a slight smirk on her lips and said, "Since your mom practically saved my life? Consider your rooms and food paid."

Raven and I looked to each other and her smirk turned to a more genuine smile. My own stoic features relaxed into a slight grin of my own.

I looked to Bellamy then, and my grin turned into more of a smile, silently telling him that we could trust her. His eyes held the slightest bit of skepticism in them, but he trusted me. I know he trusted me.

"So what is Polis anyway?" Bellamy asked. It was a question that had been nagging me as well.

Raven looked taken aback for a moment, not realizing just how sheltered we were within the walls of Arkadia. "Polis would be the Grounder capitol. It's basically the largest city of Grounders, aside from Ice Nation." Now the brutal warriors of Ice Nation, I had heard about. If people of Polis were anything like those from Ice Nation, then I hoped that we would not run into any of its people.

As we all walked down hallways and traveled up a few flights of stairs – Raven begrudgingly doing so with her braced leg – we had arrived at a couple sets of rooms. If the rooms were as elegant as the hallways were, my group was surely in for a treat.

"Six rooms available and here are your keys," Raven started passing random keys out to everyone. "We have warm water so shower up, and dinner will be served behind the foyer at about seven tonight. Until then, relax and explore."

When Raven was going to hand Octavia a key, she politely declined and looked to Jasper knowingly. I pretty much had to restrain Bellamy from marching right over to his sister and gluing the key to her hand. I could see his resistance against Octavia and Jasper sleeping in the same room. He was reluctant to let them share a tent the few times they had. But, you couldn't really lock the tents and have it be soundproof. Plus, there were no plushy mattresses in tents.

When Bellamy finally took his key from Raven, he gave her one of the meanest looks I've ever seen. I had to give Raven props for not backing down with her customer-service smile. "Go," I said to Bellamy and nudged him in the direction of his room, which just so happened to be on the opposite side of Octavia and Jasper's room. I could hear a clearly annoyed sigh escape Octavia and saw Bellamy scrunch up his face in a 'What'cha gonna do now?' way. A little bubble of laughter rose in my chest and escaped after they both nearly slammed their doors in equal parts frustration and arrogance. All the while, I stayed behind with Raven.

"Is he always like that?" she asked, letting her polite smile drop into an annoyed sneer. She wasn't the first person to give Bellamy that same look, and surely wouldn't be the last.

"Not usually," I said to her. "The other girl, Octavia, is his sister," I pointed out and something in Raven's eyes seemed to click with clarity.

"Ah, and I take it that the goofy looking kid with the goggles is her boyfriend?" she asked knowingly while tightening her ponytail and its braid.

I nodded slightly and laughed at my group's awkward situation. She soon joined along in the giggles. I had only known Raven for a few minutes, but I could already tell that she was going to be a good friend. "Thank you… for this," I said.

"It's no problem. Truth be told, even if your mom hadn't helped me out all those years ago, I still would've done this for you," Raven said sincerely. "You're all over Arkadia's news alerts. Pike wants you arrested for treason for what your father did. He wants you arrested because he thinks you're going to rally up some type of rebellion."

I looked at her and widened my eyes in a 'yeah, so what?' fashion.

"So… are you?" she asked me.

I couldn't take her piercing gaze and looked to the floor, specifically at Raven's leg brace. It looked heavy, but it did the trick and allowed her to stay upright. "My leg is usually a little stiff by the end of the night, but it helps to get around. Definitely better than crutches and it would've been a lot worse had your mom not fixed me up."

"What happened?" I asked abruptly. My curiosity was justified, but I mentally chastised myself for asking the question so rudely. "Sorry, that was incredibly rude of me to ask," I stated to the slightly older woman.

"It's fine," she stated. "At least you came right up front with it and asked instead of half the people we get here. When I was back at Arkadia, I was a mechanical engineer. I actually worked with your dad a lot, but Sinclair was my mentor. They were like… work spouses; it was disgusting," she stated with an easy smile lighting up her face.

I couldn't help but smile as well as I thought about all the times Sinclair was invited to the house as he and my father rambled on and on about new projects and future improvements to make Arkadia a better and safer place to live. All the while, my mom and I would not-so-eagerly listen to them and roll our eyes at them.

Raven sat down on one of the decorated chairs in the hallway, likely to take away some of the pressure on her leg and I eased myself into the adjacent chair.

"Well one day, there was an issue with one of the machines inside the Ark. Something got disconnected but no one was small enough to fit into the tiny space to reconnect the chords. Sinclair and your father were off at Mount Weather, trying to get our two systems connected so we could radio them, and vice versa. I'm sure one of them would've come up with a better solution…. Well, Pike oh-so-graciously volunteered me to go and do the job. I didn't mind. I told him that we would have to turn off the power for a little while so that I could fit in there without being crushed by the other moving machines. Needless to say, his impatient ass couldn't wait for me to get out of the hole before turning the power on again and he just about crushed my spine," Raven said and she looked away from me, something resembling tears glistening in her eyes. "Your mom is the reason I still have one good leg, but the other one is pretty useless these days."

"I'm so sorry… I couldn't even imagine the -the" I stated, but was cut off by her.

"The pain," she deadpanned. "I still feel it every now and then, but it got easier, and I have Wick here to help out. Without him, I wouldn't have this handy dandy leg brace."

I noted the smile on her features and asked with a devious smile, "Wick is your...?"

"Husband," she said. "Coming up on a two-year anniversary here soon."

 _Would I ever have that?_

"So if you don't mind my asking, how did you end up here? Why go to the middle of nowhere?" I asked.

She didn't seem phased by my questions thus far and merely smiled at this question. "I couldn't live by the laws of someone who showed no remorse for almost killing me. Wick and I were just dating at the time, but his impulsive ass came with me. We were just gonna keep roaming, but we found this place along the way and decided to settle down. Make a place of our own, and people started coming to us, asking if they could seek passage. We couldn't just turn them down."

"Who were they?" I asked.

"Some were Arkadians, looking to leave for the same reason I did. Mostly Grounders. A lot of Grounders that ended up coming this way because their village got burned down by the Progressives. There were so many mothers and children without their fathers… how could we ever turn away from them?" Raven asked solemnly, looking me directly in the eye.

I looked at her as well with a pained expression on my face. "You couldn't." _And neither can I._

"And then we got some merchants here headed to Polis to sell their product. Some would set up shop and then leave the day after. We charged a small price for them to set up their areas in exchange for a small percentage of their earnings. A lot of them actually decided to stay because it's cheaper to rent a space in our courtyard than it is to rent in Polis."

"So that's how this place stays afloat," I said more to myself.

"We aren't taxed either. We're neither on Arkadia land nor Trikru. Food gets a little trickier, but we manage. Some of the traders will give us food instead of money, which works just fine. Otherwise, we hunt or go to Polis."

"This… is brilliant Raven. You and Wick really have made something special here and I'm happy to know that others appreciate your work," I said in astonishment. Living more so off the land than technology-based living must be difficult for the married couple, but they're doing it.

"Go relax, Clarke. You deserve it," Raven said while patting my shoulder slightly and making her way to the other end of the hallway. _But did I? Deserve it?_

I sat there for a few seconds contemplating her words, but my feet unstuck from the ground and I unlocked the door to my room. My real, live room. I didn't bother relocking the door. If one of my companions needed me, I wanted it to be like old times where they could just open the flap of my tent or yell to me if they needed anything.

I looked around the decorated room – it wasn't overly done, but it was nice and well-kept. I had my own bathroom – an actual bathroom and not just the backside of a tree! That in itself was enough to make me smile as I set my large pack on the ground next to the bed.

 _The bed…_

I over-dramatically leapt onto the bed and buried my head into the plush pillows, laughing into the fresh scent of the sheets, but wrinkling my nose at the disgusting scent I radiated.

I hopped off the bed faster than I thought my jelly-like muscles could muster and looked at the bed, hoping to not find any dirt or grime on the bright white sheets.

I unpacked a moderately clean pair of clothes and underwear and sat them on the bed for later. Right now, that shower was calling my name.

I scrambled into the bathroom and took note of the shampoo and bar of soap that sat atop the counter by the sink. Next to it, a full-sized towel was hung up, and right across from that was my sanctuary.

It took a few seconds for me to adjust the shower nozzle and select my ideal temperature. It was just a few notches down from being the hottest temperature.

While the water continued to warm up, I began to unravel myself from my clothes. First to go was my shirt and then my pants.

The mirror in the bathroom allowed for me to see my own image in weeks. I was not impressed, and was quite surprised that Raven didn't turn us away at the door. My blonde hair was covered in so much dirt, it was starting to turn a light shade of brown. The rest of me was either severely coated in dirt and grime or still relatively clean from where my clothing would not allow the dirt to reach. Even so, those areas were still covered in a light shade of grime.

About the only area on my body that wasn't dirty was the wound on my side, which I was thankful for. It was starting to hurt again, and I didn't want to be in the shower for very long because of it.

I shed myself of my basic bra and panties, took one last look at myself in the mirror and turned away in shame.

 _How could someone accumulate so much dirt in so little time?_

I stepped into the shower and all my tension began to go away, much like the damn dirt being washed away by the drain. I smiled into the hot water and tucked my head under the shower's nozzle, applying the no-scent shampoo.

About five minutes in to the shower, no more dirt flowed to the ground and through the drain.

About ten minutes after that, my pruned-up hands were telling me that I needed to exit the warm embrace of the water. That and my side was beginning to cramp up again.

Now, I wouldn't mind relaxing until dinner.

I wrapped my body in the short towel and opened the door. My stomach growled, and I couldn't help but wonder what Wick would cook for us…

"Oh my god!" I screamed and turned away. "What the fuck are you doing here?!" I whisper-screamed.

"What the hell, Clarke?" Bellamy asked from his place on the bed. "You spent god-knows how long in there, and you couldn't put some clothes on?"

I turned back to him, fully aware that I was most likely giving him a good glimpse of my ass and realized that he was as his dark eyes obviously shifted to meet my own. He gave me a cheeky smile. _That bastard._ "Are you gonna turn around so that I could get dressed?" I asked as water started dripping from my legs and hair.

"And why should I do that?" he asked smugly.

At first, I couldn't come up with a good excuse.

I didn't want Bellamy to face the other direction. But, he had to. That's how it had to be.

"Bellamy Blake, I don't need a reason. Just turn around," I said sternly.

Instead of just doing what I told him, he laid his back against the pillows and put his arms behind his head. However, he did have the decency to close his eyes after a moment.

After waving my hand in front of his face a few times to make sure he didn't react, I quickly stripped myself of the towel and changed into the clothes I had laid out. "You do realize that the clothes I was going to change into were sitting right next to you," I said when I was fully clothed again.

"Oh darn, wish I had seen them," Bellamy said with mock surprise.

So much for the blissful naked nap I was gonna take. A fleeting thought in the back of my mind annoyingly let me know that I could still do so with Bellamy there. Be naked, that is. In his arms. His own nakedness surrounding me….

"You should go relax," I said to Bellamy as I abandoned my train of thought. I tapped him on the foot, letting him know that he could open his eyes.

"So should you," he said back to me.

I stared at him and he mock-narrowed his eyes at me. "Whatever," I said while easing my way down next to him on the bed.

"Besides, your bed is way comfier than mine," he stated.

I looked to him at my side, really looked at him. He looked and smelled as if he had done the same thing I had done – showered and put on the cleanest clothes he had with him. Even so, his attire didn't differ from what he normally wore. "You smell nice," I said to him.

"You too," he said back in a whisper.

When I looked to him, he looked both contemplative and calm. It was a look only Bellamy could pull off.

"What's on your mind?" I asked, trying my best to turn facing towards him, no matter how much I strained to do so.

"Whoa, Princess, easy there. Don't wanna hurt yourself," he said while easing me down onto my back again. He himself hovered over me slightly, his hand resting against my shoulder as his thumb drew tantalizing circles against my skin. If I thought he smelled nice next to me, then his scent was almost overwhelming on top of me.

As much as I wanted him in the moment, I couldn't shake a thought from my head. It seized my mind and wouldn't let up. "Bellamy, what do we do now?" I asked in a worried tone. He looked at me quizzically and I continued. "My mom told me to come here. That's it. Nothing else. So… what now?" I asked.

"I wish I knew the answer, Clarke," Bellamy said to me, his eyes sincere as ever.

"The whole issue is that we need to get people to see that the Progressives are bad news. Sure, my dad's broadcast helped, but Pike's censorship will take care of that like it never happened," I said in a frustrated tone.

"We have people on our side. Everyone that gave us food and supplies while we were on the run… they are with us," Bellamy argued.

"It's not enough, and you know it. They don't have guns or weapons to help us" I said back at him, sitting up from my position. "It's not like the Grounders are going to welcome us with open arms either."

Bellamy mirrored my sitting up. "Clarke, slow down and –"

"No, Bellamy! I don't have the time to relax and slow down. My parents are in trouble, they're getting beaten because of Pike!" I all but yelled at him beginning to pace the room frantically. My nerves were on fire and my blood felt like it was boiling.

"Don't you think I know that? He killed my mother, Clarke!" Bellamy yelled at me as he stood up as well. "When he decides that he wants to go on another power trip, my people will be at the expense of that first!" he screamed while locking my arms under his firm grip, looking me dead in the eye.

We stared at each other for what felt like an eternity as he continued to grip my upper-arms.

"Then why are you here and not protecting them?" I asked him level-headedly, but anger still lingered in my voice. I needed to hear his answer – his reasoning as to why he continuously contradicted his own sound reasoning through this conversation.

"Because…" he paused for a moment as he pursed his lips, obviously hesitating. "Because of you and Octavia. And even though the both of you are too stubborn to admit it, you needed me – and I needed to be there for you."

My mind settled on his last statement and how he needed to be there for me. More importantly, I realized just how right he was. But, this conversation was getting too close to a subject matter that we needed to leave alone.

"Stop," I said and turned to him. "Just… stop."

"Stop what?" Bellamy said with confusion in his voice, but it didn't reach his dark eyes.

"Stop being so strong for the people around you," I said and gazed at his features. His eyes, his lips, his nose, his lips, his cheek bones, his lips. If it weren't for our proximity and his positively warm hands covering my arms, I would've laughed at my gawking at him. Besides, I was a little too old for a school-girl crush.

Although, maybe it wasn't just a crush. Maybe.

"Screw it," Bellamy muttered before finally covering his mouth over mine. The last thing I saw before I closed my eyes at the sensation of being kissed – by Bellamy Blake, no less –- was the look of determination on his face. His hands still gripped my upper arms, but I hardly noticed it. I was stunned into a paralysis of some sort; I couldn't will my body to move of any sort. So, when Bellamy's warm lips moved away from my own after our chaste kiss, I could finally gather my thoughts and feelings as they all came rushing back. The moment I felt a cool, dull breeze against my lips and cheeks was when I realized that our moment was over.

All the while, I just stood there. Like an idiot. What was I supposed to do or say, for that matter? _Thanks so much for the awesome kiss, it was better than I ever dreamt. You have really nice lips. Want to do it again?_

No, not even Octavia was that up front with people.

 _Did that really just happen?_

He physically moved away from me after I neither said anything nor did anything to reassure that I didn't hate him kissing me just then. His hands left my bare arms and his feet began to move backwards; it looked as if he was on the defensive from a feral animal.

"Oh," I whispered finally. I kept my eyes downcast, but continued to register his retreating form.

 _Did I really want the moment to end?_

His hand was about to touch the door knob when I finally made up my mind.

"Wait… no," I stated and launched myself back at Bellamy, this time wrapping my arms around his neck and threading my fingers through his hair as my lips crashed to his in a fit of passion. My ramming into him pushed him back against the door with a thud, but neither of us cared as I trapped him between my body and the wooden door. Somewhere in this newfound moment, I felt his rough and gentle hands encircle my cheeks and jaw as our lips and nose smacked and rubbed against one another affectionately.

We didn't take it any farther than that, which was fine with me. The butterflies flapping away in my stomach were almost painful, aroused with the thought of what would happen next, yet afraid to take that step.

I pulled away from his mouth to breath, but kept my fingers laced through his now tussled hair. Together, we reveled in each other's presence as we stood in the near-silent room.

"Wow," Bellamy breathed out as he bent his head down to rest on my forehead. "That was…"

"I really liked it," I stated, ignoring the roughness of my voice.

Bellamy smiled lovingly down at me as his eyes lit up. "I really liked it, too… you don't even know how long I've wanted to do that."

 _And you have no idea how long I've wanted that._

I almost started laughing at how wonderfully absurd this whole situation was. "I'm sorry for basically pushing you into the door," i said while trying to hide my smirk into his chest.

"Hey," he said while lightly lifting my chin up. "I said I liked it, too. It was pretty hot if you ask me," he finished with a wink.

"Is that so?" I asked with a lilt to my voice that I couldn't seem to control.

"Yeah, it is," Bellamy stated huskily as he tilted his mouth down to my own again. This kiss was passionate, but slow - not the same rushed ferocity that it was before. And then I realized, I really liked kissing Bellamy Blake. A lot.

For the rest of the time before dinner, Bellamy and I stayed within the walls of my room, just basking in each other's company as well as the plush bed, kissing and whispering wishes and wants into each other's ears. Neither of us wondered about the looming near future.

 _God, this bed was wonderful._

By the time dinner rolled around, my group started filling in one by one. Bellamy and I got there fashionably early, so we witnessed Ben come in shortly after. Monty followed suit looking both clean and tired, as if he just woke up from a nap. And right on time, Jasper and Octavia came in hand in hand. Octavia looked slyly between Bellamy and I while giving a knowing smirk; although, I'm not too sure how much she knew.

Each one of us found a seat at the lavish table and sat down. Bellamy and Ben sat on either side of me, as if they were my body guards. Monty sat on his dad's side, his head resting on the table as Ben rubbed soothing circles into Monty's back. The poor kid couldn't even put up a fight with his dad. Jasper and Octavia sat across from us, Jasper looking anywhere that wasn't at Bellamy, and Octavia starring fiercely into Bellamy's challenging eyes.

We sat in the dining hall for a few minutes before anyone came. First, Wick with food. As he sat platters of different meats and vegetables and other side dishes in front of us, I began to salivate at the intense rush of smells that were wafting in the air.

"Compliments to the chef," Ben exclaimed as he dug in.

"I appreciate it, man," Wick said. "Raven should be here any moment now, but please let me know if I can get you guys anything. I'll be at the front desk, alright?" he asked looking to each of us.

We all nodded our heads, all sure that we would not need anything from him.

And true to his word, Raven came in moments after he left. But, she didn't sit down with us. Rather, she stood at the slightly-opened door, looking to us nervously and at whatever was on the other side of the door.

"Raven…?" I asked suspiciously.

I started to put my defenses up, the entirety of my appetite gone. This was it, this is where Raven was sure to turn us in to the Progressives and turn a pretty profit for her cooperation. Who could blame her? I wouldn't want a bunch of delinquents stirring up trouble in my place of home and work.

I reached under the table and grabbed for Bellamy's hand, needing his strength for whatever was about to happen next. He didn't look in my direction, but he let my hand squeeze his, his grip matching my own.

"So this is nothing bad, if that's what you're thinking," Raven started out with.

"Well forgive us for being suspicious…" Monty said as Ben slapped the back of his head.

"This… could actually be beneficial for you guys. Uhmmmm, yeah," Raven said awkwardly as she stepped aside and let the new stranger into the room.

Everyone seemed relatively unfazed by our new guest, that is everyone but me.

When trauma hits, the people involved will unfortunately have an almost picturesque memory of the people, places, and events that occurred. So when I saw the familiar sight of high cheek bones, dark blonde hair, and a deadly gaze that gave off no remorse for her actions, my heart sped up and not in the way that it did when I was kissing Bellamy.

"You!" I yelled as I stood up from my chair and began angrily walking to the figure standing in the doorway as Raven tried to step in front of me and block my advances.

I barely registered the feel of Bellamy's hand slipping from mine or when he tried to get ahold of my arm. I didn't even hear my chair hitting the floor. I didn't even hear Raven's "oof" when I pushed past her, nor did I see her form stumble to the ground.

No.

I only had eyes fixated on the person in front of me. My ears were perked, but all I could hear was a constant ringing. My hands curled into fists instead of remaining dormant at my sides.

I was brought back to a night I hoped would never make its way fully back into my mind again. It was the night that our dear Chancellor Jaha died. It was the night that Wells died.

And here stood in front of me the bitch who was responsible for it all. Yes, the fierce Princess Anya stood in front of me and I was ready for my revenge.

 **So what did you think? We got some new settings, some fluff, and a new development that will be sure to shift the story in a new direction. Drop me a review/follow/favorite, and the whole works! Have a good day/night!**


	9. The Other Side

**Author's Note: Hello all! I am back :) I've been writing this chapter in little bits since the last chapter. As always, more will be revealed in this piece of the puzzle. We pick up exactly where we left off and the aftermath of it. I'm LOVING the most recent reviews. You guys are awesome and keep it coming! Today's song pays homage to The Greatest Showman. The whole theme of this chapter is to basically show that not everyone shares the same "truth." If that doesn't make sense, then read ahead to get a clue!**

 **As always, please read, review, follow, favorite! I love your guys' support. Enjoy! :)**

 _Chapter 9: The Other Side_

 _Clarke POV:_

"You!" I accused with a vicious lilt to my voice. Some unconscious part of my mind began to take over my body. My targeted gaze remained on her face and I felt the sting of connecting skin as I punched her. _When did I even stand up?_

"What the hell Clarke?!" Raven yelled at me with panic in her eyes. She bent down to help the grounder princess as I stood over her, seething.

Anya looked to me with eyes mirroring my own. A red spot began to form on her earth-tanned cheek and I inwardly smirked with satisfaction towards the older woman. "Typical Skaikru… always rushing to violence," Anya muttered in a gravelly tone.

"Us? Us?!" I yelled. "YOUR warriors attacked my people first. YOU killed our chancellor and… and my best friend!" I could hear my voice beginning to crack with the emotion I tried so hard to keep level. Although I seethed at the woman in front of me, memories of Wells overtook the emotion of total hated I felt in the moment.

His eyes… so full of fear and worry for both himself and his father, and then nothing. His beautiful, round eyes remained open but there was no emotion to convey when he lay dead. My mom was fiercely trying to revive the chancellor, Pike was yelling obscenities at the quickly-exiting Grounder party, all the while I remained holding Wells' cold hand. Soon enough, the room had been cleared out, and Chancellor Jaha's body was being taken away. The people who were coming to collect Wells waited for me patiently to pull away from the preteen, and eventually had to grab my mother to coax me away. The whole situation was just traumatizing. How could one just watch their best friend die? How do you come back from that?

Someone laid a gentle hand on my shoulder and I looked over to see Octavia's reassuring green eyes staring at me, knowing my thoughts immediately. She didn't say anything – she didn't need to. _How could I ever come back from that?_

I retreated to my chair and gave the vile Grounder some space. Soon, everyone followed suit and Raven even pulled up two chairs for herself and Anya on the opposite side of the table.

"Look," Raven said sternly, darting her eyes between us and the princess. "She's here for a reason just like you're all here for a reason. You all have one common goal, which is to take out Arkadia's leader. How about we talk about that instead of fighting?"

 _Well someone knew how to command a room._ Raven's words spoken and her fiery gaze acquired my most acute attention.

"With all due respect, shouldn't you be dead?" Ben asked. He sat along with the rest of the group, but he partially shielded Monty from the rest of the table. I would've done the same thing. Even Bellamy sat more forward in his seat to protect the slightly younger companion.

"Yes, well…" Anya stated while dusting her already dirty clothes. "Your monarch saw to that."

"What do you mean? What happened?" Octavia asked.

Even I was curious about Anya's whereabouts up until this point.

"One could say that Princess Anya is dead and has been dead. For the past several years, I have gone by the name of Arya," she said while looking between us.

"How conspicuous…" muttered Octavia. Bellamy sent a death glare her way, but Octavia didn't care.

"There are only a handful of people who know me by my true name and clan, Raven and Wick being two of them," Anya stated. "My own people have forgotten me." At this, Anya finally seemed to show a semblance of sadness. Behind the hard exterior of her face were the raw emotions of abandonment.

It was a look I was becoming all-too familiar with.

"Alright! How's everyone enjoying their food?" Wick asked as he burst into the room.

The room took an awkward silent pause. "Oh… shit. I'm interrupting something here, huh?" the man in question asked.

"Sweetie," Raven said with a sweet smile which molded into what could only be described as a trademark resting-bitch-face. "Get out."

"Uhhh, okay love," he smiled nervously as the room began to let out soft giggles.

Raven rolled her eyes, and everyone gradually began picking at their food, still weary of the grounder princess.

"Hey," Bellamy spoke in a soft voice, cupping my elbow lightly. "You okay?"

 _Was I okay?_ "I… don't really know," I said back, as I smiled softly at Bellamy's loving nature.

"Hmph," Anya huffed from the other side of the table, looking disgusted with our exchange.

Annoyance filled my system, yet I wasn't the one to speak. Instead, Bellamy said, "You have an issue?"

"No," she stated nonchalantly. "I just remember my lover from before your people burned my village to the ground."

My mind hung on the word 'lover,' but I couldn't let myself become too engrossed with that now. "Sorry, _Arya_ , but I can't speak upon their actions." I never could on that matter.

While I grieved Wells and his father, I never could justify the slaughtering of a whole village. "But… never mind the past," I said. I pushed Wells' haunted and empty eyes to the very back of my mind. "Raven was right, we have a common enemy in Charles Pike."

"So just kill him," Anya said matter-of-factly while biting into a roll.

"It's a little more difficult than that…" Ben said.

"Until recent, our people haven't been given a reason to go against him," Bellamy stated. "Pike's a fucking snake of a man with a loyal guard to go along and enforce his law."

I could hear the passion in his voice and had to stop him from snapping the handle off his fork.

"Strong words from someone who has done nothing," Anya emphasized, with her now-signature bored tone.

Bellamy was about to start arguing with Anya, but I interjected. "You're right," I stated plainly, sending Bellamy a look to calm down. "You're absolutely right. Which is why we need your help… to stop him and stop his reign."

"Hah! And what do you suppose I'll get from this transaction?" Anya's interest seemed to pique.

"Your status. Your freedom," I claimed wistfully.

"And who's to say that I'm not already free?" Anya asked with a smirk.

I rested my hands on the table and folded them politely. "Because people like you and me feel trapped when on the run – when hiding."

Hook. Line. And sinker.

The room went silent, mind the occasional clink of someone's fork against a plate. Not even the common noises of the hotel seemed to penetrate the deafening silence of the dining room.

"Raven talked a great deal about you, Clarke Griffin. And of your mother as well. Abigail Griffin is the reason I am now alive. She asked that I fulfil a favor of her daughter's when the time came," Anya stated. "And now I must uphold that promise."

I felt a sigh of relief barely escape my chest at this news – at the woman with whom I hated so much.

"My mom said that there was someone who could help us take Pike out of office, as well as his adversaries. What can you offer us?" I asked.

She thought about her answer for a moment and looked to me wearily. "You need an army to take out those monster killers," Anya said while scrunching up her nose.

"Progressives," everyone in the room groaned at the same time. It almost brought a smile to my face.

"I can request an appearance with our Commander," Anya stated while stroking her chin. "Between the Commander's personal army and the foot soldiers of the other eleven clans, it might just be enough."

The Commander must have been their grand monarch. "When can we meet with this Commander?" Ben asked, hands folded on the table.

"Only one of you may take this journey. Our Heda does not take kindly to multiple strangers of Skaikru showing up out of nowhere," Anya stated to Ben specifically. "Clarke will be that person."

"No… no way!" Bellamy yelled. "She's not walking into enemy territory alone!"

His features flared with anger at the prospect of my journeying alone, while Anya remained rather amused.

"Bell… stop," I stated. "It's fine, it'll be fine."

"No, Clarke!" he stated aloud. Much quieter he said, "I can't lose you again. Not now…."

"You're not losing me though," I said intimately. "I'll come back. I'll come back to you, I promise."

Surely, I had no clue as to what we were – if labels were even important anymore – but what I felt for the man beside me was enough to get me back to him at all costs.

"You are both too damned strong-willed for your own goods. I can already see in your eyes, Bellamy, that you will follow no matter the warning I heed," Anya pressed. "Clarke and Bellamy will make the trip. The rest shall remain at The Inn for further instruction."

I could feel the nervous energy in the room and everybody's desire to argue with this prospect. I nodded my reassurance to them and shook my head at the others to keep from argumentation.

The food was long forgotten at this point.

"When do we leave?" Bellamy asked.

"I will leave tomorrow and present myself to the Heda," Anya stated firmly. "You will both leave the day after tomorrow for Polis and hopefully we can come to some agreement.

After all, the enemy of my enemy was supposedly my friend. We had to try this. "Sounds great," I stated, not totally meaning it.

XXXXXXXXXX

I continued to eat the wondrous food without complaint although my stomach was left in knots. I still had so many questions; I still had so much hate for the woman across the table.

Little bits of conversation filtered around the enormous table, but none of it loud enough to fill the void of the room. Raven sure did have one impressive piece of architecture here. But even with the room's enormity, the walls felt like they were closing in on me and the voices of my peers felt as piercing as tinnitus, the food as bitter as poison in my mouth. "I'm gonna walk the grounds," I abruptly stated to Bellamy who was discussing the finesse of bowhunting with Monty quietly.

"You want me to come along?" he asked immediately, Monty looking to us inquisitively.

I shook my head no and received a sad smile from Bellamy signaling that he reluctantly understood. "We'll talk later," I stated firmly and caressed his upper arm lightly.

On my way out, I saw Jasper talking to Raven and gesturing wildly at her leg brace, both reminiscing over my mother. I couldn't help feeling more out-of-place even if I tried. What with Raven being so close to my dad and Sinclair, and Jasper being so close with my mother, I felt as if I was intruding on my own family business. "Raven, mind if I steal you away for a second?"

"Yeah," she said to me. She first turned her attention back to Jasper. "When I get back, I'll tell you the modifications I made to make this damn thing accessible."

"Right on!" Jasper stated. "Maybe when we make it back to Arkadia, we can send some braces your way to modify to suit people better," he said with glee.

I couldn't help smiling at Jasper's elation for the future, whereas I could only conjure up a grimace.

Raven and I walked out the door together and down a couple hallways. "Should we really leave Hot Head in there with Anya?" she asked.

"Maybe, maybe not," I claimed distantly.

Raven looked at me sternly, with a no-bullshit attitude that was becoming trademark. "As far as I've seen, you're the only one I really need to worry about losing their shit. Don't gotta worry about Bellamy when he's not the one throwin' punches."

I looked to the floor then, ashamed of my actions. "Right. I'm sorry…"

"No, don't apologize for what you thought was right. But did she deserve it? Probably not," Raven interrupted.

"I don't think I understand…" I said, confused.

"Everyone has their own truth. Know yours – hell, own it!" Raven said confrontationally. "But respect hers, too."

"That's not what I was going to apologize for," I stated although I began to understand what she truly meant.

"Then what for?" the spunky brunette pondered.

"I'm sorry for pushing you down… _that_ was wrong of me," I said.

"Already forgiven," she said back. "Right out that door at the end of the hallway leads to the gardens. Has an ocean view," she claimed while walking away.

Upon walking out the doors, I was met with a chilling breeze that I wasn't quite prepared for. I hadn't brought my jacket to dinner, but was regretting the lack of clothing now as I tried to pull my sleeves down to cover my hands.

The scents from the garden were absolutely heavenly. Different plants and flowers littered the patch of greenery, some I recognized, some I didn't. the air felt perfumed with their wondrous smells but it wasn't overwhelming in the slightest.

And man, was Raven right about the ocean view! One could hardly call it a view when the water was right there. Every time the waves crashed against the shore, I could feel the ever-so-slight spray of water hit my face.

I walked the gardens for quite some time, ignoring the slight cramping in my side. The wound didn't need nearly as much attention, but it could still be a pain in the ass.

The cramping became more painful as time went by, and I decided to take a seat at one of the picnic benches that was in the middle of the gardens, resting my arms against the cool concrete. _Maybe I could take Bellamy here tomorrow…_ The thought brought a slight smile to my face.

But then my smile dropped as thoughts of Wells Jaha filled my mind.

Sitting amongst the beautiful flowers and exotic plants, I thought about what Wells would have thought of this place. Politics was never Wells' chosen dream, it was just some responsibility that was placed on him before he was even born. When we had landed on Earth, Wells had become almost obsessed with the local plant life and its comparison to the plants that inhabited Earth before nuclear war.

I even helped him steal an encyclopedia from the library, so he could just have it ready. Nobody ever wanted to use it, and we figured it wouldn't be missed. _"Ooooh, we're so badass. We stole a library book," we would joke with each other._

 _And then other days, Wells would joke "If politics don't work out for me and everyone turns out hating me, then I can just run to the woods and become a hermit."_

 _"And I'll just have to come with you, because even a hermit needs to have a best friend as great as me!" I said back._

 _"I wouldn't have it any other way," Wells would say more seriously._

 _I'll never forget you, Wells…._

"Pleasant night, is it not?" came a low voice from behind me.

I cursed myself for letting my guard down. "It is, this place is incredible."

"May I sit?" Anya stated, gesturing lightly to the seat across from me.

I nodded my head curtly and deemed that her presence was safe. Surely, she wouldn't kill me – if she kills me, she kills her chances of gaining her identity and status back.

"Polis will be a lot different from Raven's… crowded streets, lots of people trying to sell you food, jewels, clothing, weapons. Lots of guards, especially the closer that you get to the Heda's tower," Anya stated in a serious tone as I took mental notes.

"How should Bellamy and I present ourselves to your commander?" I asked.

"Be humble and remember your place. You are Skaikru, not a friend. Remember that," Anya said rather harshly.

"Ouch."

"Would you expect anything less? Your people have destroyed countless villages of ours – villages that don't even house our warriors," she continued.

Pushing down the immense guilt I felt towards the actions of my people, I asked, "So what is your role in all of this?"

"The plan is for me to leave tomorrow morning and present myself to the Heda. I never met her before I was declared leader of my village, so it will take time to convince her that I am who I say I am. After all, 'Anya' is technically dead," she chuckled a little.

"Well not anymore," I said inspiringly.

"Right," we both paused. "You and Bellamy will join hopefully a day or two after. That should give me enough time to convince the commander of my own identity and prepare her for your presence."

"Do you have a map?" I asked, remembering that I had no idea where Polis was.

"I have one in my pack and will pass it to you tomorrow morning."

"Okay… alright," I said, while the anxiety built up in my chest. "What could go wrong?" I joked.

"I betray you and you and all your friends are killed," she said curtly.

"Oh, so you don't know what sarcasm is…" I said.

"Oh, I do," Anya smirked slightly as we let the silence hang between us for a few seconds.

"How do you know my mom?" I asked, remembering the small detail from dinner.

"Your mother saved my life," Anya said. "If it wasn't for her… I might not be here today. She found me in the woods nearly dead and brought me back to your medical facility."

"How?" I asked. _How did mom get passed all the security?_

"She reassured me that she had done what she did for me many times before and that I could trust her. Naturally, I didn't. I was in enemy territory after all," Anya said.

"I had no idea…" I claimed, questioning all the times my mom came home late.

"Your mom," Anya said looking me dead in the eye, "She knew it would come to this at some point. When she found me… it was only two days after we met for the peace negotiations. My people were gone, and I fled. Somebody had shot me, but I just kept running and running. I didn't know where to. I kept running until I thought that no one would follow me," Anya almost whispered. "I knew my people… were dead," she took a long pause. "I couldn't make it to Polis and couldn't tell the direction I was going in... I thought I would just die. When your mom found me, she told me that a bullet nicked my femoral artery and that I was lucky to even be alive."

I made a risky choice and gently laid a hand across her wrist that rested on the table. "I'm sorry for what we did to you. Even after Jaha… that was unspeakable."

She took her hand back from my own with discomfort in her posture. "Clarke… you should know something."

The air between us stilled for several moments; The crashing of the waves became silent; the perfumes from the plant life were halted.

"My people did not murder your Chancellor…" she whispered as if it were a secret. "We were eager to agree upon peace and felt that we could learn a lot from the group of people that fell from space, and share resources."

"You thought we could work together…" I said.

"I did," Anya admitted.

"I did too, even though I was too young to really understand all the politics," I claimed.

"But you're older now and you still see a possibility of peace between our clans. That... that takes courage," Anya reassured.

"Do you? Still want peace, that is?" I asked suddenly. After all, I needed to know if her heart was going to be in her mission.

"I want peace with the people who also want peace," she stated matter-of-fact. Changing gears, "You don't seem surprised about what I told you… about Chancellor Jaha and his son – your friend," Anya said in her own surprised tone.

"Yeah…" I said calmly. "Yeah, I think I've known that… to some extent. I mean, it makes sense. It was just easier to blame it on someone else, not one of my own people."

"Do you know who could've done something like that?"

"Yeah, unfortunately I do," I claimed. "Pike."

"Pike… makes sense," Anya shook her head in agreement. "Fuel to the fire," she ended with.

I could once again hear the waves and feel the slight chill of the spray hitting my face. I could smell the floral scents from around us. I could feel the earth beneath my feet and the cool concrete of the bench.

"Fuel to the fire," I repeated.

 **So, I'm sure that some of you guessed it. It wasn't the Grounders that poisoned the Jaha's! As it turns out, Anya isn't the worst person ever. We got some insight to the upcoming plan for our heroes, and there is lots of Bellarke coming your way! I'm thinking of doing a little fluff chapter for our group of delinquents next up just taking advantage of the Inn and the water before getting back into the plot. Thoughts?**

 **Keep it classy, guys!**


	10. One Indescribable Instant

**Author's Note: Hello again, thanks for staying tuned! Here's some fluff... and angst... and confusing young-adult stuff for you. Got a couple different POVs in this chapter, some dealing with heavier subject matter than others. Why not take a little break from the plot?... Just a little one. This takes place right after Anya leaves and the day before Clarke and Bellamy are due to leave. I set this chapter up to kind of mimic the format of "The Tales of Ba Sing Se" from Avatar: The Last Airbender.**

 **The song comes from the show Crazy Ex-Girlfriend season 1. Sound familiar? Good, cause its another CW show! As always, review, follow, and favorite your convenience. :) I am also going to be updating my other Bellarke story, _Something Different_ , hopefully later on today as well. And for those of you who are currently reading that piece, I'm sorry, I know it's been a year-ish but I've been going back and forth and back and forth to give the best chapter that I can give. **

**ANYWAYS! ENJOY!**

 _Chapter 10: One Indescribable Instant_

 _Clarke's POV:_

 _The next morning:_

Anya wasted no time in making her way out of Raven's Inn and left on horseback, assuring Bellamy and I that we would have our own horses and giving us a map to go off, even though it was far from readable. "Just go that way until you see a really tall tower," she claimed sarcastically, pointing in the direction where Polis supposedly was. _Bitch._

The plan was simple, just follow Anya's lead, don't overstep with the Commander, and don't act entitled. _We could do this…_

But until then, what?

"So do we have an actual day to just, dare I say, relax?" I asked Bellamy, who stood at my side, loyal as ever.

"Yeah… yep," Bellamy responded after a few seconds. "This feels… weird."

"Almost like its too good to be true," I thought suspiciously, my mind already betraying a perfectly good day. _Stop being so paranoid, Clarke._

"Alright, stop right there," Bellamy said to me as if he was tuned in to my consciousness. Turning me to face him with his hands on my shoulders, he said, "None of that. We actually have a day to relax and we should take advantage of it."

"We've had many days to relax," I stated plainly.

"Yeah, but when was the last time we had real beds to sleep in and no hikes to worry about?"

"Okay, so you make a good point with that," I said with a slight smile. "So, what do you wanna do?" I asked, an unfamiliar flirting lilt taking place of my normal tone. _Jesus Clarke, tone it down._

Before answering, he took me in his arms and I felt his lips descend onto my own. We weren't too out in the open despite being outside, but a small thrill ran through me at the thought of being caught. Or was it worry?

"Whatever the hell we want," he claimed in between breathes as he continued the delicious ministrations against my lips.

I let him take control of the moment as he backed me up against the building's wall. My hands traveled from his waist, to his shoulders, and into his hair – my nails surely leaving light trails of reddened skin. He didn't seem to mind. He himself held me fiercely to his chest, his own hands trailing and pressing against my waist and back, even traveling down to the swell of my hips.

While I enjoyed it all, the feelings that were stirring in the pit of my stomach were relatively new for the man in front of me. And while I did… have feelings for him, this was all just so new and a little confusing.

I blamed the nervousness on my last failed relationship and Finn's cheating ways. The man – more like boy with the way he acted – tore my heart out and broke my trust. And while I was able to pick up the pieces of my melodramatic heart, my trust was something that couldn't be easily earned anymore. Sure, I trusted Bellamy enough to not let me die, but I couldn't be sure that I could trust him with my heart quite yet.

 _Maybe I should just pull away before we get too deep; before one of us gets hurt._

 _Or maybe just keep going and let myself be happy._

But what if one of us died? Maybe Bellamy could go on without me, but after so much history, I couldn't imagine a life without him.

"C'mon, let's go see what everyone else is up to," I pulled away, not trusting myself to let him continue, now with a sour taste in my mouth and a pit of anxiety swelling in my chest after my zero-to-one hundred thought process.

Behind me, I could here his groan of frustration, but he complied. "As you wish, Princess."'

* * *

Ben POV:

This morning was different to say the least. The dreaded Princess Anya had left for Polis this morning, Bellamy and Clarke sending her off. I had gotten up shortly after Anya left to see what the plan was, doubting that my son, Octavia, and Jasper were awake yet, but when I walked into the courtyard, the two horny little shits were going at it like it was the last day on Earth.

 _Hooligans, I swear_.

Still, I felt a bit of happiness to see some sort of normalcy among these kiddos. All of them, including Monty, grew up way too fast.

I just wish my son could find someone to match with. However, not in the way where him and his companion made out in public or slept together despite family being in rooms all around. _Hooligans._

Me? I accepted that my love story was over. My heart would always be with Hannah, and I don't think I could be with another person even if I tried.

I came to terms with it.

I accepted it.

But there were just some days, like today, that I felt the loss like a sack of bricks was thrown onto my chest.

Shaking the thoughts of young love out of my mind – _damn young people_ – I crossed into the foyer, coming up to Raven as she sat at the main desk.

She looked up from whatever it was she was doing and gave me a courteous smile. "How're you doing this morning, Mr. Green?"

"Please, just Ben," I claimed with a short smile. "I'm well enough. And you?"

"Eh, woke up with a stiff leg. Hah-hah," she said with sass and an easy smirk.

"Well, it seems my group has a day off today. What's there to do around here?" I asked her as she gave me her full attention.

"Well, we have the Saturday Market going on today – our regular vendors sell every day, but because Saturdays have the most foot traffic, Wick and I allow some of our regular travelers to set up their booths. Lots of food, music, drinks, crafts, knick-knacks," she listed off.

"Sounds like a Unity Day festival," I said lightly, remembering all the festivities that Monty, Hannah and I would do on those days, especially when Monty was younger.

"Yeah, but this isn't an Ark holiday," Raven stated. "This is just what we do."

"I suppose it is," I stated thoughtfully.

"We also have the beach. Today would be a great day to get some sun and take a dip in the water…. Have you been to the ocean yet?" she asked, realizing that I had still lived a sheltered life in the confines of Arkadia.

"I have not had a chance to be at the beach yet. Anything I need to know?" I asked, mulling the thought over in my head.

"Don't drink the water, don't cut yourself on a rock, go with the waves and go with the riptide," Raven said with confidence.

I didn't ask how she seemed to know so much about this subject. Instead, my eyes were transfixed on something behind her.

A calendar.

"Today's May 21st?" I asked. The time had passed.

"Uhhh…" Raven looked behind her. "Yeah, appears so."

"Oh. Th-thank you," I stated to her, leaving the front desk.

I decided to take Raven's advice and check out the Saturday Market. Maybe the kids would come out and join, but I decided against going to check on them. It was still early, and they needed the sleep.

I walked through all the vendors, different Grounder merchants speaking in their own languages while also appealing to the English language sometimes to sell their delicacies.

Some of the peaceful Grounders could sense that I was Arkadian and gave me weary glances, but even so wore tentative smiles on their faces to make their products the most appealing.

Each and every craft and article of clothing was done beautifully and seemed more intricate than the last, the items clearly made with care. And the food – oh god, the food – smelled divine.

However, it wasn't until I came across a small booth with bouquets of flowers lining each shelf that I was truly mesmerized. Some of the botany I was familiar with, whereas others were a mere mystery. The red carnations, I recognized those immediately and was going to run a finger over the delicate petals before a small but commanding voice said from a chair, "You are Skaikru."

Not a question, not a frightened exclamation. Just fact. "Yes, I am," I said back, giving the elderly woman my full attention now.

"Your friends – the blonde and the tall one with dark hair – they saved my village from being burnt to the ground and killed those Skaikru monsters…" the woman went on slowly. It was easy to tell that English was not her first language, but she got her point across.

"Yes, I remember that. I'm… sorry that we couldn't get there sooner," I claimed and looked away from the woman's face. I truly did remember that village. Some huts and houses had been burned to the ground, and there were a few casualties among the villagers. Still, our group of delinquents received gratitude from the small village, and they offered for us to share the river. "You are quite a ways from home. What brings you this way?"

"Good for business. Miss Raven grows a beautiful garden, but she buys her exotic flowers from me. In exchange, she gives us meat that lasts the month. Sweet girl," the old woman smiled fondly as I wondered if we were talking about the same Raven. "I see you admiring the dark red carnations. Do you know the meaning of them?"

"Deep love… affection," I stated simply, a slight smile on my face as I remembered the first time I ever brought one home for Hannah. She had admired pictures of them in books back on the Ark's library. When we first married, my gift to her had been a bouquet of paper carnations colored red. She teased me for the numerous papercuts that ran jagged across my fingertips.

"For your significant other?" the older woman inquired with a slight grin in place.

"My wife, yes" I stated simply as the smile slowly dropped from my features.

"Take them," the woman beckoned.

I looked to her dumbfounded, making no move to grab the bouquet.

She rolled her eyes and placed the bouquet into my hands. "Free of charge," was the last thing she said before going back to her chair and picking up a well-read book from small table.

"Thank you," I said at last, the bouquet beginning to shake ever so slightly as my hand trembled.

I walked past the rest of the shops and down towards the beach, admiring the waves crashing against the shore. I would have to take Monty down here later.

Instead of walking through the sandy shore to get to the water's edge, I traveled more into the increasingly dense forest. That is, until I got to a clearing of sorts. Rather, the ground was plainly covered in rocks and boulders opposed to the normal mossy dirt from only a mere few feet away. "This'll do," I said to myself.

Soon enough I had created a small shrine of rocks. Really, I was just stacking them neatly and praying to whatever deity was out there that they wouldn't be knocked down.

This would be Hannah's unofficial grave. No grave stone, no carved words, no true funeral. Just this pile of pathetically stacked rocks. At least this was something that wouldn't be propagated per Pike's unyielding wish.

I sat down in front of the impromptu grave and frowned. "I wish I could've given you more. But, I suppose this will do. You were never much into big gatherings and people making a fuss over you anyway. Remember our wedding? God, you were so uncomfortable with everyone watching you – you tripped twice just walking down the aisle," I smiled fondly at the obstacle of that day. Sobering up, "I'm so sorry that this happened to you. God, Hannah… how am I supposed to go on and feel this way? How can I be strong for Monty when I can barely be strong for myself? This is all so… fucked up. All these kids… they shouldn't be here. They should be living their lives and finding jobs and getting married, not running from the fucking government. How could it come to this? Clarke, Abby and Jake's kid – you remember her, right? She was shot, and nobody noticed. She almost died and I felt that grief… of almost losing a child. I realized that somewhere along the lines, they all became my children, even the surly one - Bellamy. I guess that's the one good thing that came out of all this shit, huh? Monty always said he wanted a bigger family."

I sighed deeply, thinking back on the time spent with my new family. "But in that grief… I didn't reassure Monty that it wasn't his fault. He kept thinking it was him – that he should've noticed something was wrong, that he should've shot the Progressive first. I didn't try hard enough to reassure him that none of this was his fault. God, Hannah. I wish you were here." And like many times whenever I would be stressed or frustrated, I moved my right hand to rest atop my left shoulder, almost as if I could feel the pressure of Hannah's own hand there. Always there for me. "Always," I whispered with a tear slipping through my eye.

I grabbed the intricate bouquet of carnations from a nearby rock pedestal and set it atop the stony grave.

"Happy Anniversary, sweetheart."

* * *

Octavia POV:

I felt the sweet embrace of my boyfriend cuddled up to me. _My boyfriend._ A small smile came to my face as I began to wake up.

The loud and abrupt snore from right behind me had my smile turn more into a grin. _Gross._

Trying not to disturb him, I turned slowly in the bed to face Jasper better and my heart did a flip-flop.

He was so peaceful as his mouth parted slightly, hair hanging in his eyes, almost touching his nose at this point. _He needs a haircut._

I swiped the hair out of his face and tried to push it behind his ear when he suddenly grabbed my hand and brought it down to his lips to kiss. He then opened his big brown eyes and smiled wide at me. "I could get used to waking up like this," he claimed.

"Ditto," I said back to him. "This is nice. This bed is absolutely lovely. And the company is okay I guess," I claimed while smiling bright at him.

"Okay? Just okay?!" he asked while jumping on top of me and pinning to the bed with one hand holding both of my wrists. "Take it back – say I'm the best bed-mate ever and I'll let you go," he claimed with his face inching closer and closer.

"And if I don't?" I challenged.

"I swear to God, I will start a tickle fight with you," Jasper stated back.

Quick as can be, I threw my hips into his own which gave me just enough leverage to flip us. Now I was on top and had his hands in my own. "Please, go on about that tickle fight," I stated ruefully.

Sure, I was small, but Marcus Kane had only taught me how to use that to my advantage if in a self defense situation.

"Way to play dirty," Jasper huffed.

I ground my hips into his own and witnessed a sly grin cross his face. "Quite literally," I said back. I allowed my body to languidly slide down to be flush against his chest as my legs still straddled his lower half. I flipped my long dark hair to one side and attacked Jasper's neck with my lips.

With each bite, suck, and lick to his skin, he grew more and more restless if his writhing was anything to go off. When I felt that I had left his skin nice and marked, I let go of his wrists and sat up. However, I did not have time to get off from the man below me before his upper half shot off the bed and held me to him once more.

My hands flew to his shoulders to hold the both of us steady as he looked into my eyes. "You are so beautiful," he said. And I could have sworn that I could see shooting stars in his pupils.

My hands made their way into his hair as his ran up and down my back and sides, dipping ever so slightly to my hips, and even more tentatively towards my ass.

This was a new step. Before in the tents and even last night, we had not gone as far as kissing or touching in socially-acceptable areas. So yeah, this was new, but I liked it. "It's okay, keep going," I said to him in a small voice.

His eyes searched out my own just to confirm my words and I felt his hand cup my backside with one hand where the other ran circles and shapeless patterns across my thighs. At these sensations, I let out a soft sigh of bliss and felt Jasper's erection lightly against my leg.

Our lips were brushing against one another, but neither of us moved in closer to finalize the kiss, afraid of breaking the rhythm we had created thus far.

As if of my own accord, I began to lightly grind against his clothed but hardened cock, not necessarily knowing what I was doing. Hearing the soft sighs and groans he made though, along with his hands tightening against my ass and thighs, I knew I had to be doing something right.

"Octavia," he whispered to me, a sense of need and urgency in his voice.

 _Kiss him, kiss me._

I titled my lips and dove onto his own waiting mouth when a loud knock at the door stalled my actions and sent me jumping high into the air and away from Jasper.

My heart stilled, and a brief moment of panic shot through my body. All the while, Jasper threw a blanket over his nether regions, breathing heavily.

"Octavia, Jasper! Time to get up!" Bellamy's voice boomed from the other side of the door. It was then that I noticed it wasn't locked.

"S-sure Bell! Be out in a minute!" I yelled through the door. "You didn't lock the fucking door?!" I whisper-yelled to Jasper.

He gave me an incredulous look and threw his hands into the air. "How was I supposed to know?! We've been living in the woods for the past umpteen weeks. I forgot that locks were a thing!" he whispered back.

"O, you good in there?" I heard Bellamy yell through the door.

"Yup, see you in a few!" I yelled back, sitting back down on the bed next to Jasper and laughing a little.

"Next time don't forget to lock the damn door," I said to him while taking his hand in my own.

* * *

Monty POV:

I remembered my bed from home and it was sure as shit not as comfortable as the one I was lounging in right now. Realistically, this bed could fit three people, and that wasn't even counting the space left at the end of the bed!

 _Could I steal this bed and take it home?_

Home.

What even was that concept now? Was Arkadia really still home? Mom was gone, and Dad was already here with me. And when I really thought about it, I couldn't think of anything that I left behind that I truly cared enough about now in this moment. I had everything that I needed, but it would be nice to settle down at some point. I wanted to get a job and work in a lab, build a house of my own, get married, have a kid or two. I didn't just want to survive, I wanted to live.

I just wanted life to be normal again.

But there was another part of me that wanted to take part in it all. One part of me loved the adventure and traveling to new places. I didn't know there was so much of a world on planet Earth. There was some part of me that felt I had a purpose in all this, despite the people around me trying to shelter me from it all.

That couldn't last. It wouldn't. Everyone knew what this was leading up to, and when that time came it would be all hands on deck.

I was brought out of my thoughts by a light knock at the door. "Monty? Can I come in?" Clarke asked from the other side of the door.

"Yeah, go ahead," I yelled from the bed, turning towards the door and sitting up in the bed.

She smiled to me fondly and I couldn't help the streak of jealously that I felt knowing she and Bellamy had a thing going on. Even back during our class project, I was attracted to the blonde. What could I say, Clarke was my first real crush. I knew she didn't see me in the same way, given that she gave off more of a nurturing vibe when around me. Even though Octavia was younger than me, I was the kid.

"How'd you sleep?" she asked while taking a seat opposite of the bed.

"Really good. It was weird not hearing my dad's snoring. Or not being on the ground. Or not being cold. Or not hearing weird animals at night… but when I got passed all that, I slept like a rock," I rambled.

"Good, glad to hear it," she laughed a little.

"Did Anya leave already?" I asked.

"Yeah, just a little while ago. Your dad is out and about, but I was thinking that we could get everyone together and go to the beach when it gets warmer today. Take a picnic out, go swimming for a bit. How does that sound?"

"Sounds great!" I exclaimed. "I can finally meet some babes," I winked to Clarke mischievously.

"Hah, alright stud. Reel in that ego of yours, before you get as bad as Bellamy," she laughed. "Let's say three hours? Gives you enough time to explore the grounds if you want."

"Nah, I think I'll just go back to bed for a while. Let me know when you guys are good to go," I said cheekily. I couldn't tell how long we would be staying at Raven's Inn, but I planned to take full advantage of the downtime.

"Sure thing. Curtains closed?" she asked while getting up.

"Yes please!" I said while getting myself comfortable under the sheets again.

The room became dark as she closed the curtains and shut the door to the harsh lights of the hallways.

I heard the sound of Bellamy yelling and knocking on Octavia and Jasper's door when Clarke walked out of my room. At least I'm not the only one not getting laid…

* * *

Bellamy POV:

The morning was generally calm and quite warm, given that it wasn't summer yet and I was just looking forward to having a day off, which was a strange concept. To not worry about anyone for a whole day was something that I hadn't taken advantage of yet since being thrown into this whole overthrow-the-government thing.

Really, before Jake Griffin's announcement, I hadn't realized just how wonderfully easy life was. Now, I begged for the days where I went to work and came home. And that was it.

But passed all the killing and having to fight to live each day, I felt more in my element than ever. I loved the adventure - not being confined.

Not to mention, the close proximity with Clarke was always something to be grateful for. Nowadays, she wasn't a walk across town, she was two tents down. A selfish thought, I know, but who is it that says to make the best out of a bad situation?

But now, we were at Raven's Inn, and although our worlds were turned completely upside-down with Anya's introduction, we all reveled in the day off for it might be the last one in quite some time.

After Clarke and I saw Anya off this morning and our short moment of intimacy, she had abruptly cut off going any further. I understood, but still let a groan slip out. I wanted her so bad, but knew the only way for her to be comfortable was for her to come to me.

So I would wait.

And wait.

But one day – hopefully soon – she would come to me and I would be ready.

"You okay?" Clarke's voice brought me back to earth. "What's with the smirk?"

Truthfully, I hadn't realized that I was wearing any type of grin. "Don't worry about it, Griffin," I said with a cocky tone and continued to walk in front of her, leading the way back to our rooms.

After a few seconds, "Oh, gross!" Clarke yelled at me and swatted at my arm.

This time, I felt a warming grin cross my face at her jab. "You don't even know what I was thinking about!"

"I know it was something gross… sicko," she mumbled.

"Wouldn't you like to know," I claimed in a sing-song voice, baiting her.

"Not yet," she joked back although there was a seriousness in her eyes.

"Not yet," I repeated her words as she smiled tentatively back to me. I knew what I wanted from this… whatever we had going on but wasn't sure that she was ready for anything yet. She hadn't even told me about what her and Anya talked about last night.

 _Don't overthink it Bellamy._

At some point on our short walk, we thought that today would be the perfect day to go to the beach. Not daring to let Jasper and Octavia do whatever they pleased behind closed doors, I had banged on the offending architecture to let my presence be known. _God help him if he touches my sister…_

Meanwhile, Clarke had gone to wake Monty. Neither of us worried about Ben as I had at least caught him witness to our kiss not so long ago. _Maybe that was why Clarke pulled away… No, stop. We're trying to have a relaxing day. Don't read so much in to it._

It was agreed upon that we would all meet up to go down to the beach in about three hours to fully enjoy the warmth. Until then, everyone did their own thing, which mostly consisted of going back to bed and enjoying the respite of the day.

I myself had gone back to my own room for the couple of hours and tried going to sleep. That wasn't happening. I wished that I could be back in Clarke's bed – _talking, kissing, cuddling, touching… Stop that!_

God, it was like one head had a mind of its own.

To stop my topsy-turvy thoughts I got up, prepared to search the Inn, maybe even talk to Wick about some of his cooking tips, or apologize to Raven for acting like an ass the day before. However, when I walked out of my room, Octavia was quietly shutting the door to hers. She looked to me with a slight smile and put her finger up to her mouth, signaling to be quiet. "He's sleeping," she whispered.

I merely nodded and asked "Wanna go for a walk?"

She nodded and we trekked off to wherever our feet led us.

"Clarke okay?" my sister asked after some time, her voice full of worry.

"I… don't know," I admitted.

"Yeah, she gets upset when Wells is brought up," Octavia pointed out matter-of-factly while I stood in shock.

"Oh, I didn't know they were close when he was… yeah," I stammered, hurt that Clarke never told me about this.

"Oh, yeah," Octavia started off awkwardly. "She doesn't tell very many people that Wells was the 'best friend' before us."

"Makes sense," I stated shortly.

"But, you mean a lot to her, so she'll tell you eventually, okay?" she said while looping her arm through mine and placing her head against my shoulder.

I placed a quick kiss to the top of her head, something I've done many times, but hadn't for a while, at least since everything happened. "I miss this," I said absentmindedly.

"Me too," Octavia said into my arm as we continued walking.

It was silent for a few minutes before either of us spoke, and then when we finally did again, the conversation was rather trivial.

"What are you talking about?" Octavia asked sometime into our chat. "Jasper isn't that weird!"

"The kid wears goggles around his neck half the time!" I stated back talking about the somewhat-lovable doctor.

"So that just means he's prepared. We're going to the beach later, right? I bet no one else has goggles they can use," she fired back.

"Touché, little sister, touché," I smiled. "But, he's treating you right? No funny business?"

"Alright Bell," Octavia said. "I am not having that conversation with you, Mom already –" she started before a look of immense sadness crossed her face.

I felt it too.

"You know, when you were banging on the door earlier this morning… it sounded like the Progressives all over again," she admitted, looking at the ground. And there she was, the small girl I had cared for since she was a baby, no longer the warrior hardened by the hand dealt by life. "I was scared for a second, like it was all happening again."

Even though she didn't look at me, I could see tears shining in her eyes as she willed them to not spill over. "O…" I said and pulled her into a hug. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean for that," I apologized while holding her. Slowly, her own arms came to circle me as well.

"It's not your fault. I just – it made me realize that I haven't thought of her in so long," she whispered, as if disclosing a sin. "Is that bad? Does that make me a bad daughter?"

"No!" I stated vehemently to her while holding her even closer than before. "If Mom could see you now, she would be so proud. You gotta believe that, O."

"She'd be proud of you, too," Octavia said back as a dull pain ached in my heart. Octavia started laughing though. "Mom and I, we used to make bets about when you and Clarke would end up together."

"What?" I asked, bewildered.

"Don't play dumb," Octavia said while disentangling herself from me. "We both knew you were head over heels for her back then, and it's just gotten worse since. You guys seriously make me wanna barf."

"Wait, what was the bet even?" I asked, baffled that my own sister and mother were conspiring behind my back.

"Let's just say I would've won," Octavia said smugly.

"Hmmm, maybe not," I said with a sigh.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"Let's just say," I said using Octavia's own words, "two steps forward, one step back."

"Well Clarke is difficult like that," Octavia stated with a smirk. She had a point. "She'll come around."

"That's what I'm hopin'," I whispered back. In my periphery, Octavia smiled.

"Besides, you're pretty difficult too," she sassed.

"Well if that just isn't the pot calling the kettle black," I threw back as we made our way to our family.

The conversation about Mom left me feeling raw, but upon seeing everyone headed towards the beach – together, no less – I felt a new sense of completeness. Ben threw an arm across Monty's shoulder and ruffled his hair. Octavia and Jasper ran towards the water hand-in-hand. and Clarke… Clarke stood a respectable distance away but admired the extended family as much as I did.

"You good?" she asked, concerned.

"I'm good," I replied confidently. "Are you good?" I asked back.

She bumped my shoulder then. "I'm always good," she said sarcastically. "Just trying to remember this moment."

 _Together._

"Me too," I admitted.

Although the sun and the water painted a beautiful picture, I knew that it would all be a mirage come tomorrow. The family would be split up, the calm would be no more, the stakes would be higher.

I reached for Clarke's hand and she took it without hesitation. We knew the future would not be so picturesque and basked in the comfort that each of us offered the other – wanting it, needing it.

But this moment – _God, this moment_ – could last a thousand years.

 **Author's Note: See look at me confusing the story and such. I love being evil like that :) Hope you all enjoyed the chapter and let me know what you think. Next chapter... back to the plot.**


	11. Heaven Nor Hell

**Author's Note: Hello everyone, got your chapter 11! We have some conflict coming up in this installment. However, it is relatively short with less than 3000 word-count (yes, that seems to be short for my writing). Title of the chapter comes from Volbeat and supposed to signify a type of limbo that these two are settling into.**

 **As always, let me know what you think! Review, follow, favorite, or drop me a PM - it all keeps me going. :)**

 **Enjoy!**

 _Chapter 11: Heaven Nor Hell_

 _Clarke POV:_

 _Three Days Later:_

* * *

Although leaving the rest of the group was difficult, Bellamy and I had saddled up some horses and rode to the general direction of Polis, hoping that we weren't being lead into a trap.

As the long days and cold nights continued, I found that it became easier to strategize an upcoming plan to diplomacy opposed to living in the moment with cramped legs and awkward smiles. It provided a great distraction from the family I left behind and the stupid-handsome man beside me, and the seemingly impending doom that was sure to come.

Before Anya and I parted the night of the disastrous dinner, we discussed more about what peace might look like between Arkadia and the Grounder clans. She explained the full extent of how the coalition of the thirteen clans operated. She claimed that Ice Nation – Azgeda, she had called them – was once a part of the coalition for many generations but with their most current queen taking a violent turn against the Commander, it was no wonder that the other twelve clans elected to banish them from the coalition's territory and trading routes. Over time, even before Princess Anya was declared 'dead,' there was no treaty between the two power entities and a covert war had begun.

And today, the role of the thirteenth clan was available, and maybe Arkadia could take its place. Instead of taking from the Grounders, we could also give back and help – just like with the small villages we passed to get to the Inn. _If Bellamy and I played our cards right… maybe we could score that spot._ This was how we got to peace. This was plan A through Z, and I was unsure of what to do if this plan were to fail. "You think this'll work?" I pondered aloud while riding up closer to Bellamy. I wasn't pretending any more than he was that I knew how to properly ride a horse, but neither of us had fallen off or died yet. However, the dull ache between my thighs was becoming overwhelming as the pain in my side turned sharp with each gallop. My wound would surely never heal properly what with the hell I'm putting it through. However, I could only imagine the discomfort that Bellamy was in.

"If we try," he smiled. _I want to believe you._

"I just keep thinking that Arkadia could be the thirteenth clan and – I don't know – make it work," I stated hopefully. But then my expression became grimmer. "And then I think about the shit storm we'll have to endure to get there… _if_ we get there."

"Never said it would be easy Princess," Bellamy defended.

We trekked uncomfortably on the horses for a little while longer, the aches becoming worse with every step my stead took.

It truly felt as if we were nearing Polis, but any 'giant-tower-that-you-can't-miss' was still not yet visible.

We had barely spoken to each other and neither of us complained about the silence thus far. There were times I wanted to converse with the man at my side, yet something held me back. I felt like I was expecting too much from him, yet I was angry for what he had given me – kisses, a yearning for more, a little piece of heaven.

I could see the same restraint in his eyes and posture when riding. He would sometimes turn to me or smile slightly as if he were going to say something but then the corners of his lips would turn down into a frown and he would bow his head almost shamefully, picking at his horse's saddle. And nothing would be said. We were walking on egg shells at this point, willing to keep them from breaking any further, stuck in a type of limbo.

Nevertheless, we found a steady rhythm. We rode, one person took watch for several hours and would wake the other for second watch. We left mid-morning and then resettled down just before sunset.

Today was no different as we pulled off to the side of the beaten-down path and pushed further into the dense forest to make camp for the night.

"You set up the tent?" Bellamy asked as we came into a small clearing, surrounded by seemingly thicker trees than before. This journey so far made me think back to when the Ark first landed as Myranda, Wells and I explored the new terrain with no cares in the world, our young minds' allowing us to believe we were invincible. How I missed them both dearly – the boy who wanted to live among the flowers and the girl who didn't live long enough to develop any relationship with Earth.

I merely nodded my head absently as I hopped down from the horse, careful to not fall or startle the gentle creature. I tacked the beautiful black stead to a nearby sturdy branch and Bellamy did the same, taking out a container to pour them water. I grabbed the equipment to pitch our tent while Bellamy went to collect small sticks for a fire. It was in these moments that I took peace in his absence.

I felt more frustrated than grateful towards his insistence on traveling with. The less people on this journey, the better it would turn out; yet, Bellamy had to risk himself and the mission for some foolish concept of chivalry. And even more so, I was frustrated with myself for letting him come on this mission. I should've tried harder to get him to stay where he was safe with Octavia and _our_ people.

Hell, I didn't even need _protection!_ There had yet to be any signs of hostile Grounders, dangerous animals, or Progressives. A win to behold in my book for sure. We were a long way from Arkadia by now, so it was natural to think that the Progressives hadn't traveled this far out. While Arkadia knew about Ice Nation, I was unsure that Pike or any one Arkadian knew of Polis.

However, what was to be said about Raven's Inn? She housed open trading there. Anyone could pass through and cause harm and she was within the Porgressives' radius, and from what I observed, she was lacking in security or self defense detail. It was dangerous to rely to much on the goodness of people, even though I had counted on it many times until this point. What if they needed one of us there? What if we both died without any of our family knowing?

To reiterate, it was dangerous to rely of the goodness of people – even family.

We could fail, or die, or both most likely and no one would know. They would be left merely with an inkling suspicion.

And with that, I realized that Bellamy Blake was a selfish, selfish man.

Putting up the tent, I thought of the place I once called home, my mind running off on another tangent; not just Arkadia, but simply the home that my parents had built. My father being an engineer for the Ark and Arkadia and my mother being the chief doctor, we were very well-off. We were given the chance to design our own home and that's precisely what we did. It was a comfortable four-bedroom house with all the amenities that any other household was granted. My favorite part of the house was the large bay window that faced towards the woods along with the little window seat. That, and the wrap-around porch just outside the front door where I could draw the landscape from any direction I wanted. Even with the threat of Grounder attacks prior to the treaty, Wells and I spent many times in those woods, taking care to be wary of threats. After his death, Octavia and I spent most days hiking and exploring the trees and different plants, ranging from making each other flower crowns to throwing mud at each other.

Now, I found that my home rarely revolved around the physical place that I lay to rest or played a game of tag in. My home had become my people – my family. And right now, my home was somewhere in these woods right now, collecting firewood. I smiled to myself despite the shrewdness I currently felt for him.

And then I felt something completely different as I popped off the pouch of my long knife and took hold of the hilt, letting my fingers dig into the soft leather as I pretended to dust off some dirt on the tent, my attention on the unknown discrepancy behind me. _Stay frosty Clarke._

Rule #1 of Marcus Kane's self defense class: _if you feel like you are being watched, chances are that you are. Stick with your gut._

My breathing stilled as I whipped around, expecting to be met with force. Instead, a group of black crows flew from the thick branches. Their loud flapping and horrible caws frightened me, my heart leaping with trauma never to come. Should I be relieved that they were nothing more than crows or worried for the bad omen that a murder of crows often brought?

From my right came another loud crash as I gathered myself into a defensive stance.

"Ow, Jesus! This fucking brush is thick," came Bellamy's voice as he emerged from the bushes, rubbing at his forearm where a thin but angry red mark marred his otherwise perfectly tanned skin.

I visibly relaxed as he fully came into view but still held my stance, knife poised and ready to strike out. He held a sensible amount of firewood under his arm, while his other reached out to part the branches and thorns blocking his way.

"What's wrong?" he asked while setting the wood down in a neat pile.

"Nothing… I guess I just got spooked," I stated, looking away while slipping the knife back into its holster. An uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach remained.

He grasped my elbow slightly, concern evident in his dark eyes. "Anya will come through," he stated soothingly. I wanted to believe that so much. "You sure you're okay?"

A small flare of anger made itself present at the distant thought of his protectiveness and pushiness. So, I shook his arm away and stared daggers at him, my previous fear completely forgotten. "I'm quite fine, actually." My mind raced and zeroed in on one thought: _selfish, selfish, selfish!_

Bellamy looked taken aback by my abrupt attitude change. The slight outburst had been manifesting for days now, even since the day on the beach. Now, my frustration with him along with endless days on horseback and dwindling supplies was starting to boil over.

You'd think by now that I would learn how to deal with stress better. Guess not.

The sun fell completely shortly after as we ate our small dinner in a tense silence, a small fire between us, just barely lighting the contours of our faces.

Although the fire would have been nice to have going all night, we couldn't risk anybody spotting us. The fear of the unknown became a real possibility the closer we got to Polis.

"You figure out what you wanna say when we get there?" Bellamy asked as he tended the slowly dying embers.

We both knew our time in the woods – yet again – was coming to an end. It was time to figure out the right things to say when presented to the Commander. However, I would not lie to my coleader. "No, nothing seems right," I said almost shamefully.

He sighed and glanced away. "Better figure it out then."

"Don't you think I know that?" I exclaimed with annoyance. "Why are you trying to start shit right now?"

That got him riled up. So many times, Bellamy and I had fought over the most trivial topics. But that was a long time ago, and we were playing different games.

The stakes – the cost – was much higher now.

My head told me to stop before I got too far ahead of myself while my heart oh-so begged to go on, excited for the nonsense fight that was about to commence.

"I'm starting shit…" Bellamy laughed in disbelief. "I'M STARTING SHIT?!" he raged on. His eyes flashed with anger against the fire as he stood, storming over to me. He yanked me up by my upper arm and held me in a tight grasp. "I'm just trying to make sure YOU don't go and get yourself KILLED," he nearly yelled in my face.

I pulled out of his grasp and gave him a rough push away from me. and then another push for good measure. Although I had been taught to fight by one of the greatest fighters in town, Bellamy still towered over me and weighed a great deal more. He barely moved backwards at my shoves. "ANYONE, literally anyone, could have _escorted_ me. Hell, I could've saved everyone the trouble and _escorted_ myself!" I yelled in his face. "I'm not just some… child you can push around – we aren't kids anymore. EVERY choice we make from here on out will affect our future."

"I know Clarke!" Bellamy said hotly. "But we need to go in there as a united front. We need a plan of action," he calmed down significantly.

"Then why was it not two minutes ago that all the pressure was on me?" I asked while breathing heavily. "Why is this all so fucking complicated?" I asked more to myself, resigned.

"Are…" Bellamy began but was hesitant to finish his thought. "Are you still talking about meeting with the Commander?"

I took a moment to answer, trying to compose myself as tears began to blur my vision. "No, I suppose I'm not."

"Oh," was all he said.

"Why did you kiss me?" I asked, only a small impish hint of desperation in my voice.

"Why did you kiss me back?" he repeated, his brown orbs pleading with me.

I took a moment to answer. Really, there were several things I could have said. _Because I wanted to know what you tasted like._

 _Because I wanted to know how your lips felt against mine._

 _Because I wanted to stake my claim on you and live the life two twenty-something year olds should._

 _Because I think I love you… I think I'm in love with you._

Instead, "Because I care." _I care about you._

And dammit, if I wasn't a selfish, selfish woman to be even remotely happy that it was Bellamy on this journey with me.

"Well, I care too," he immediately stated back with no hesitation, reaching down to kiss me. He was already cupping my cheek in his warm hand, his thumb running against the frail bone beneath. The movement was mesmerizing, a hypnotist's best trick. His nose bumped into my own and I felt his breath caress my top lip, a silent plea for an invitation. I so badly wanted to oblige. And yet –

"But we can't… not right now," I whispered as a tear slid down my cheek. I rested my hand against his chest to stop any further movement, feeling his shoulders slack in grief. I looked into his eyes to find a great deal of disappointment in his dark orbs. "I'm so sorry Bellamy."

An awkward silence fell between us, neither wanting to make a wrong move, or a wronger move than what had been previously made.

"I'll take first watch," he said while sitting back down and poking at the fire. "Get some sleep."

Suddenly, I missed the way my nickname rolled off his tongue and the way his hands held me so dear.

I discreetly wiped the unshed tears before they could fall and turned away. "Goodnight Bellamy," I barely whispered.

No response.

I took up space in the sleeping bag under the glorified tent, which more resembled a protective tarp. I could still see Bellamy's silhouette from my position.

The last thought I had before drifting into a fitful sleep was that the sleeping bag smelled like Bellamy Blake – something I took an annoying amount of comfort in.

* * *

"Clarke!" Bellamy yelled from the ground as I sat up quickly in the blanket, my eyes adjusting to the darkness quickly. His chest was pinned down to the ground, a boot heavily resting against his back.

I attempted to hastily remove my knife from its holster as Bellamy was knocked upside the head by our attackers.

I threw my knife and hit the target in the side of the neck, a pained gurgling noise coming from him as he reeled away from Bellamy, falling to the ground.

Before I even had time to register my first kill – the first time I ever murdered someone – someone else attacked me, punching me across my face.

I fell to the ground and the last thought I had before being hit in the back of the head was: _Grounder_.

The fire was completely burned out, the scent of smoke filling the air around. My vision blurred as I attempted to reach for Bellamy. I felt one more crushing blow to the back of my skull and passed out.

* * *

 **So what'd you guys think? C'mon, I couldn't simply make this an easy journey for our protagonists. All types of conflict going on in this chapter, AND MORE TO COME! Just need to get the next chapter edited, but it is written and HEAVY! Keep it classy, guys!**


	12. Betrayed

**Author Note: Hello everyone! We're back with the next chapter! Little bit of overlap in the beginning, but it's basically picking up where the last bit of chapter 11 left off... but with Bellamy's POV. There will be a POV switch later in the chapter and a "Dreamscape" portion clearly marked _"Dreamscape"_ with a line break. **

**Look at that chapter title... Betrayed. Hm, wonder what's going to happen. Title is both relevant to the plot (duh) and the dreamscape scene, so keep your eyes open for that tidbit. Otherwise, the inspiration for the title comes from Avenged Sevenfold's song off their _City of Evil_ ****album.**

 **As always, feel free to drop a review/follow/favorite/PM as you see fit! I love to know what you guys are thinking. :)**

 **Enjoy!**

 _Chapter 12: Betrayed_

 _Bellamy POV:_

There were two reasons that I offered to take first watch that night: One was for the pure reason that I had too much adrenaline in me to even attempt a nap. The second was due in part to the blonde who lay in the tent right now.

I wasn't trying to push her buttons. Really, I wasn't! There was a time and place for that kind of stuff but now clearly was neither to intentionally pick a fight.

Or maybe deep down in my unconscious mind, I pushed her buttons to get a reaction out of her… just something. Anything!

I could still feel the area where my chest burned from her almost electrifying pushes, even after hours later. Part of me was surely mad that she was shutting me out, after everything, and especially after our rather intimate times at Raven's Inn. Those sweet, sweet kisses. What I wouldn't give to do that now…

But no. She needed space. And that's just what had to happen. Far be it from me to change Clarke Griffin's too-stubborn-probably-for-her-own-good mind.

I looked to the tent that held the currently sleeping woman. Her back was turned toward me, but her shirt was beginning to ride up, giving me a new view of her back, her bra just barely peeking out from under the offending article of clothing. It was a teasing sight to behold. _How dare she._

Suddenly, I heard a rustling in the brush just up ahead, near the tent. The sound came and went as if it was done by accident; a predator slipping up.

It was a noise that I was not meant to hear.

As if the predator could read my mind, a loud thud and sharp sting against the base of my neck brought me to the ground. I was dazed as I tried to flip the hair out of my eyes.

"CLARKE!" I yelled as a foot pushed into my spine.

More attackers came out surrounding our camp. The rustling was no accident; it was intentional – a test – to see if I would take the bait, and I fell right for the blasted trap.

These men were too versatile and comfortable in their surroundings to be Arkadian. Plus, the four or five of them didn't appear to be using guns. These were Grounders and they did not seem to think we came in peace.

Before I could tell Clarke to get out of here and run, I felt myself unable to speak as my world went black. The last scene before me was Clarke's blue eyes shining with terror as she reached for her pocket knife.

* * *

 _Dreamscape:_

I was tired from work and all I wanted to do was go home and crash for the rest of the day. And the next day. Luckily, I had switched a shift with someone, so now I had both tomorrow and the next day off. A real weekend! Even though it was the middle of the week.

I was already prepping my mind for the wonderous sleep it deserved only hoping that Octavia and Mom were out and about. Mom would most likely still be at work herself, but there was no telling if Octavia would still be in school for the day or home.

The walk home was generally pleasant as I passed houses and buildings, seeing people and Progressives preparing dinner or doing chores. I turned from the houses and set my sights on the path of the standard and small dwelling I called home. Much like many other Arkadians, my mother decided to move us into one of the small housing units on the ground as opposed to on the Ark. Due to the still-new policy that families could have more than one child, our house was only a two-bedroom with a small study. When Octavia was little, the study was her designated room because who needed a desk? I loved history and always did well in school, but never cared to do any homework on an actual desk choosing a small tray and the comforts of bed instead. In short, we had the space. When Octavia got a little bit older and into her teen years, she plead her case that she needed more space "for sleepovers and stuff!" she had argued vehemently. So, being the amazing and selfless big brother that I am, I let her switch rooms with me – I wasn't using most of the space anyway.

While my room was small, I was excited to get back to it and sweet, sweet sleep.

Upon rounding the last corner to home, I was surprised to see a slender figure sitting on the porch. "Clarke?" I asked. "Where's O?" I wondered with a more worried tone.

"She's probably just in class still," she said in a small voice, head down. And did I hear a sniffle?

"Hey… are you, uh, crying?" I asked stupidly. _Dumbass Blake… of course she is!_

She laughed at me curtly and looked to me with red-rimmed eyes. "No, Dummy. Just admiring the beautiful day. Clearly."

"Clearly," I repeated back in a joking tone, trying to lighten the sour mood. Never in my life had I seen this woman cry before and I was concerned for the circumstances.

However, I knew trying to pry information from her would only result in her pulling away from me. Our 'friendship' was hardly a friendship at all, but I knew enough about Clarke Griffin to know some now-trademark mannerisms. I would let Octavia handle this one, no matter how curious I was. "Wanna… come inside? Get a snack before O gets here? You can wait in her room or chill in the living room if you want."

She numbly nodded her head and stood from her spot on wobbly legs. She must have been here for a while.

"You want anything to eat or drink?" I asked her while she took up residence at my kitchen's island.

"Just water, thank you," she said.

We both knew that she knew where all the dishes were, per our study time rehearsing Julius Caesar and then her continuing friendship with Octavia. Yet I felt a strange urge to provide for the woman who sat before me, despite my aching joints.

I took my time getting her water, trying to fill the silence without actually speaking.

After handing he the cup of water with a polite smile, I did small things around the kitchen, like putting away the small amount of clean dishes into the cupboard or taking a wet rag to some of the dusty counters and appliances. I would make my exit when she did, and she had not given any indication to doing so.

"Broke up with Finn today," she said out of nowhere, breaking the tense silence that had been building. "I should feel great, but I just feel like shit right now," she admitted. "It's stupid, I know."

"No… it's not stupid. It's normal," I tried to reassure, taking a seat right next to her and giving Clarke my full attention.

"Turns out…" she breathed in and out shakily, looking at the ceiling to keep the tears at bay. "Finn was cheating on me. Don't know for how long, didn't care enough to stick around."

 _Wow._ I was at a loss for words. It wasn't any secret that I wasn't fond of Finn Collins and I usually made that a point of topic whenever Clarke brought up her boyfriend. Between us, it was just good-natured fun. But now, my hatred for him nearly exceeded its limits. Just as Octavia had been accepted into the Griffin household, Clarke became an extension of the Blakes.

Needless to say, I was ready to punch a certain long-haired brunette of the male species. _Stupid motherfucker._

"Yeah, he is," Clarke chuckled humorously. I hadn't realized I had said what I did out loud in my thoughts of anger. "It's just… and I'm not looking for any validation here," she paused, pursing her lips in concentration. If I stared at them for too long, she gave no mention of it. _What was that, Blake?_

She picked back up her thought and two tears fell down her cheeks. My heart broke for her. "It feels like I'm not enough. I tried to give him everything, except, well… yeah," she mumbled the last part as her cheeks got red. I understood immediately and felt my cheeks go hot at the admission despite my best efforts to push it to the back of my mind. "And if he did this to me, who's to say that someone else won't… like I'll never be enough."

Clarke let out a pent-up sob and I couldn't resist bringing her to my chest in a near bone-crushing hug. I tried to cradle her head as best as I could as I felt thick droplets of tears soak onto my neck. I tried my very best to comfort the poor girl whose spirit seemed shattered. She continued to cry while letting out a sob every now and then. Meanwhile, I slid my hands across her back and up and down her arms, trying to lightly massage the tense muscles beneath.

A few minutes had passed when her tears fell less frequently and her sobs turned into hiccups.

"You are enough Clarke," I stated just above a whisper. I wasn't even sure if she heard my admission. I felt another few tears drop onto my skin. "And if Finn Collins couldn't see that, then he is a fool who doesn't even deserve to be in your presence. "You are royalty after all, Princess," I ended with.

I felt her chuckle against my skin as her hands began to let go of my now-wrinkled shirt. "You're weirdly good at this," she stated matter-of-fact.

"Well yeah," I replied back. I've had to comfort Octavia who found herself in similar situations.

She fully pulled away from me now, looking significantly better, although her eyes and nose were still red-rimmed. Nevertheless, the blonde in front of me remained beautiful as ever.

And I, unfortunately, was falling for her. I had been for a while now, ever since the first time she came over to run lines as Pindarus and Cassius in the final act. Even during the duration of my relationship with Gina, Clarke's well-being remained at the back of my head.

She was just in my thoughts. Constantly! I often found myself wanting to ask Octavia if Clarke was coming over for dinner that day. Or hoping that she would spend the night just to get the chance to see her in the morning.

"I would hate to ruin your 'lady killer' reputation if someone saw this," she gestured between us, a small smirk playing at her lips. I hadn't even known these rumors of my sleeping around was still a thing. However, I knew of one person who had seen us together: my mother, who sat outside now. She looked into the window before walking into the house some minutes ago and had waited patiently since, not wanting to disturb the moment, all the while being present for it.

"Well then I guess we'll just keep this a secret between us," I said looking into her thoughtful eyes, a new twinkle in them that I hadn't seen before. I wondered if she would ever see herself the way I did.

"I suppose so," she sassed. Clarke was back. She gave me one last hug, burying her face into the crook of my neck, her arms circling around my midsection. I wrapped my arms around her once more, gentler this time – not out of sheer desperation. "Thank you," she said simply with one final tear that ran its course down to my chest.

* * *

I woke to the all-too familiar wet tears dripping down my neck and chest. However, this time I was not presented with the warmth of home and the tears of heart break. Not to mention, my head felt fuzzy as if making its way through dense fog as I tried to gain all my senses back.

Scent: the musty air from wherever I was, yet faintly lavender. Or was it vanilla?

Touch: the cold ground pressed against my back. Sturdy. Cement to be sure. Wet. Generally unpleasant. Yet… warm hands were running across my chest and down my stomach. Not so unpleasant.

Taste: cotton-mouth, at best. Chapped, although how does a whole mouth feel chapped? And the air was humid, so much so that I felt I could taste it in my throat.

Sound: "Bellamy, please wake up," a teary voice plead. She was distraught. Clarke. My Clarke. "Not like this, Bell. Not. Like. This."

"Don't be crying over me and ruining my rep. now," I tried to say halfheartedly although it came out more of a croak.

Sight: there was hardly a lick of light in the room we were occupying. Whatever light there was was compromised of torches on the other side of thick steel bars. But in front of me, in my direct line of sight, sat a teary-eyed Clarke Griffin. Her hair was sticking up in all ends, dirt and blood giving her blonde tresses a new character. Her face was caked in a sheen coat of sweat, donning a slight cut against her cheek and upper lip. Beautiful.

* * *

 _Clarke POV:_

"You stupid fool," I cried to the bleary-eyed man on the ground, as I cradled his cold cheeks, feeling some warmth come back to them. "You fucking idiot," I muttered this time around, looking at the man that lay before me. _He was just so still… cold…_

 _I thought you were dead_ , I wanted to say, yell, scream, and whisper all at once.

"Wow, that's harsh to wake up to," Bellamy groaned, trying to sit up.

I placed a reassuring hand to his back to combat his struggling from sitting up. "Take it easy," my voice cut through the silence once more.

When we pulled him up into a sitting position, we simply looked at each other, an unspoken conversation I was unsure of. His hand reached up and grazed the side of my hair, coming back with traces of dirt, leaves, and dried blood on his palm. The place where the Grounders knocked me upside the head was slightly tender but there didn't seem to be an cranial damage or otherwise signs of traumatic brain injury.

Bellamy gently moved his hand to then gently trace the pulsing cut that ran along my cheek. Hopefully, it wouldn't scar. Stupid guards.

We had the same thought then as we came together for a crushing hug – a primal urge brought about by our meek survival. "I thought you were dead," I chose to whispered into his chest.

He only pulled me further into his lap, as if we could possibly get any closer and held me tighter. Neither of us argued; we both needed the comfort, appropriateness aside.

For several moments, we just sat like that, wrapped in each other much like several days ago at Raven's Inn, trading the soft bed for the dank, wet cement. The warmth in my heart remained.

"Clarke…?" Bellamy asked after some time. "Did they hurt you?"

Stupid Bellamy all bent out of shape about the wrong things. I almost laughed at myself. "Your worry is horribly misplaced," I stuttered with a sheepish grin.

"It's not though," he said seriously.

"It's… nothing I couldn't handle. Just a little headache is all," I tried to reassure.

"And this?" he asked as his hand ghosted over the tender mark against the side of my cheek.

I shied away from his grasp ever so slightly and watched as he furrowed his brow. "Awhile ago, while you were still…out of it, some guards came in with water. When I asked where we were or what their plans with us were, they didn't answer because of course, right? So, I tried to grab one of them, and he hit me across the face. It doesn't really hurt though, could've been worse."

"Do you think we made it? To Polis?" Bellamy asked, a bit of hope in his eyes.

I sighed. I had been trying to figure this out as well. "I'm not sure. These Grounders look like Trikru from what I've seen, but there could've been two or three more villages before we got to Polis."

Bellamy started looking around frantically. When an animal becomes trapped in a cage, they are sure to try their damn hardest to look for an escape, no matter how unattainable. He sighed loudly. "So I guess we wait."

"Guess so," I breathed out, scooting myself against the wall of the cellar. I closed my eyes for a few minutes as I heard Bellamy patter about the small cell, most likely searching for a way out. I didn't have it in me to tell him that I already checked every block of cement, every crack in the wall, and every steel bar for weaknesses. Nothing.

Some short time later, he huffed a sigh and begrudgingly sat down next to me, the warmth of his shoulder just barely dimming the all-consuming cold I had been feeling.

Turns out, we needn't wait much longer before several armed guards unlocked the door and came into the room – more than before. "Don't try anything," one of them said in a heavily-accented voice and functional English. I recognized him as the man who had struck me earlier as we gave each other side-long glares. "Get up," he said to the both of us.

I thought about fighting them for a brief moment, but even with Bellamy by my side, we were horribly outnumbered. He must've thought the same.

Our wrists were tied painfully tight and our mouths gagged with a cloth I didn't want to know the origins of. After the guards' handy-dandy work, we were being pulled by chains from the cell.

Through hallways, corridors, and up staircases – many staircases – and even more hallways, my budding anxiety grew. My guess was that we were being taken to the clan's leader, if the increasing number of security detail was anything to go by.

With each passing step, I felt myself inching closer to Bellamy, seeking some kind of comfort or reassurance. I wanted to grab his hand but feared that it would raise suspicion and distrust. We couldn't have that, not now. We held each other's pinkies, barely a grasp and hardly able to put weight on the tentative connection.

As we walked through an opulent yet seemingly modest double door, I put forth as much strength as I could muster, as I now squeezed Bellamy's pinky finger in my own.

The throne room itself was rather elegant, yet held its deadly appeal that came with Grounder clan décor. I wasn't given much time to gaze about the room before I was being shoved to the floor, on my knees. "Bow before your Heda," one of the guards seethed.

 _Heda… Commander! That meant…_

I looked over to Bellamy, simultaneous hope and fear in my eyes.

Polis. We were really here. But something was desperately wrong. If Anya had done her part, then we wouldn't have been thrown into a jail cell.

The guard spoke a few words in his native tongue to the Commander, as I brought my head away from looking at Bellamy.

I wasn't surprised to see that the Commander was, in fact, a woman – because women were bad asses too – but I was surprised to see just how young she was. She was no older than Bellamy's age with nearly striking features. Her brunette locks were done-up in many different intricate braids that were carefully brushed away from her tanned face. She wore appropriate amour and looked battle-ready what with the menacing sword hilted to her waist. Her hand rested atop it comfortably. Her face was covered in a mask of war paint that set her apart from any other Grounder I had seen prior; this was her crown and she was clearly in charge.

She cocked her head curiously at us, seemingly ignoring her guard. Her expression was heavily guarded and unreadable. "Why have clansman from Skaikru come so far? Surely we are outside of your… humble jurisdiction," she said in a booming voice.

"We do not come here as Arka – Skaikru," Bellamy said confidently from beside me, the malice in his voice barely being constrained.

"So it is asylum you seek then?" she asked.

"No, we do not," I stated this time.

At this, she almost seemed surprised. _Almost._ "Then why have you come?"

 _No. No, no, no, no!_ The Commander gave no indication that she knew who we were or our mission. Anya didn't follow through with the plan. _Bitch._ I tried not to look crestfallen. Our plan had failed and I was too stupid to come up with a backup, not that being ambushed really helped matters either.

"We've come to offer peace," I said confidently, winging it.

"Peace, you say? Attacks, massacres, dishonorable battle, thievery, rape, killing clan leaders –"

"But Princess Anya is alive!" I yelled while fully standing. Quick as lightning, the Commander produced a small knife and brought it to my neck. I felt a slight trickle of blood begin to run down the curve of my neck, and watched as Bellamy squirmed from the ground. I tried to ignore both as I stared down the Commander.

"Princess Anya kom Trikru was murdered at the hands of YOUR traitorous people after trying to make peace with Skaikru nearly a decade ago." She shook her head disbelievingly although no emotion was on her face, neutral as ever. "I should kill you right now." She paused. I held my ground.

She withdrew and languidly sauntered back to her thrown, sitting down and crossing her legs casually. "You will both answer on behalf of your people's crimes against my clans. For such heinous acts, your punishment will be see fit." Another pause as she looked directly at me. "Death by hanging. At dawn."

The guards stood us back up. My body felt numb as I was being hauled up, just barely able to see Bellamy struggling and trying to get out of the guards' firm grasps. "This isn't right! You can't do this!" he yelled.

"And it was not right when Skaikru MURDERED colonies of my people. Men, women, children, warriors, homemakers, merchants simply trying to make a living, and artists alike," she yelled back to Bellamy. She then looked me directly in the eye, while I tried to remain strong, although I was sure all the color had drained from my face. "Jus drein jus daun – Blood must have blood… You seem like a competent enough person, I hope you understand. You have until dawn… I suggest you say your goodbyes. Take this small bit of mercy of knowing your time of death and do what you may until then."

All the way back to the cell, Bellamy struggled against his security, having to have five guards carrying him by the time we reached the familiar corridors that lead to the cellars. Our last place of living. "Bellamy!" I yelled. The two guards escorting me gripped my arms tighter, but I made no move to break free. "Just give up Bell. It's over – we failed," I confessed aloud, one rogue tear slipping down my cheek as I realized the gravity of our failure.

* * *

 **Exit light, Enter Lexa, amirite? I feel like she's being pretty reasonable here, so props to her. But yikes for Clarke and Bellamy. And gosh dang it, I wonder what happened to Anya... Hm. Guess all shall be revealed shortly! Definitely one of my favorite chapters to write so far. Stay tuned and keep it classy!**


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